There’s a belief many of us carry without ever questioning it:
If things feel hard, we must be doing something wrong.
So when resistance shows up — discomfort, fear, pushback, uncertainty — we assume it’s a sign to turn around. To retreat. To go back to what’s familiar.
But sometimes, the opposite is true.
Sometimes you face difficulties not because you’re off track — but because you’re finally on the right one.
Especially when you’re choosing something new. Something honest. Something that honors who you actually are instead of who you’ve always been expected to be.
Familiar Paths Feel Easier Because They’re Familiar Not Because They’re Right
We are creatures of habit.
We do what we’ve been taught.
What we’ve seen modeled.
What feels easiest in the moment.
Even when those patterns don’t serve us, they feel safe because they’re known.
But “easy” doesn’t always mean aligned.
And “comfortable” doesn’t always mean healthy.
Sometimes the path that looks smooth is the one leading you further away from yourself. And the path that feels difficult is the one asking you to grow into someone new.
New choices almost always come with new discomfort — not because they’re wrong, but because they’re unfamiliar.
The Cost of Taking the Easier Softer Route
For a long time, I chose what felt easier on the surface.
I avoided conflict.
I tried to minimize attention.
I looked for solutions that required the least resistance.
But those choices didn’t bring peace — they brought consequences.
I didn’t get what I needed.
And when I did, it often came through manipulation, avoidance, or dishonesty with myself. I ended up doing far more emotional labor trying to maintain something that never truly fit.
What I thought was “keeping the peace” was actually betraying myself.
And over time, that betrayal showed up as anxiety, resentment, and exhaustion.
People Pleasing Is a Survival Strategy Not a Solution
Many of us learn early on that being agreeable feels safer than being honest.
So we prioritize other people’s comfort.
We swallow our needs.
We tell ourselves it’s not worth the trouble.
But unspoken needs don’t disappear — they turn inward.
They become anger.
They become sadness.
They become numbness.
And eventually, the weight of living out of alignment becomes unbearable.
That’s often the moment when people turn to outside fixes — anything to quiet the voice inside that says, This isn’t right.
I did too.
I tried to numb myself.
To silence the discomfort.
To convince myself I could stay somewhere I didn’t belong.
But I couldn’t — because I wasn’t supposed to be there.
The Truth Always Finds You
We can hide from the truth for a while — sometimes even for years.
But deep down, we always know when we’re not living authentically. When we’re shrinking. When we’re dimming ourselves to fit into spaces that don’t allow us to grow.
And when we finally start making decisions that honor our truth — maybe for the first time — the difficulties that arise can feel overwhelming.
But those difficulties aren’t punishments.
They’re signs that you’re walking where you’ve never walked before.
New Difficulties Mean New Growth
The challenges that show up when you choose yourself feel hard because they’re unfamiliar — not because they’re wrong.
They require courage instead of compliance.
Honesty instead of avoidance.
Boundaries instead of people pleasing.
But here’s what matters:
These difficulties are far healthier than the ones you lived with while betraying yourself.
Fear shows up when we’re letting go of old versions of ourselves.
Uncertainty shows up when we’re stepping into something real.
That doesn’t mean stop.
It means keep going.
Doing the Right Thing Doesn’t Mean Everyone Will Understand
Choosing what’s right for you doesn’t mean you don’t care about others. It means you care enough about your life to live it truthfully.
If you’ve chosen the right people, they’ll want the best for you — even when it’s uncomfortable. They may walk beside you through the difficulty.
And if they don’t — that tells you something too.
Sometimes growth requires moving forward without everyone coming along.
Or continuing relationships in a different way.
That isn’t cruelty.
It’s clarity.
Only You Can Walk the Path That’s Meant for You
Only you know what’s right for your life.
Only you can do the work to build it.
Only you can walk through the fear that stands between where you are and where you’re meant to be.
Difficulties don’t always mean danger.
Sometimes they mean direction.
So suit up, SLAYER.
Step onto the path that asks more of you — because it gives more back.
You’re not alone.
Plenty of us are walking beside you.
And we’re cheering you on.
SLAY Reflection
Let’s reflect, SLAYER:
S: Where in your life are you choosing what’s familiar instead of what’s true?
L: When have you ignored your needs to avoid discomfort or conflict?
A: What difficulty might actually be a sign that you’re on the right path?
Y: What would honoring yourself look like today — even if it feels uncomfortable?
Call to Action: Join the Conversation
I’d love to hear from you.
Where have you faced difficulty because you were finally doing something right?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.
And if you know someone who’s questioning their path because it feels hard, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a nudge.
