facts

Pain Is Inevitable, Misery Is A Choice

I talk a lot about letting things go and acceptance here at State Of Slay, I also talk about being accountable for your actions. Inevitably we will experience pain in our lives. Life does it dance and sometimes we fall and skin our knee. But it’s up to us whether we get back up again or remain on the ground focusing on the pain of what has happened. We have a lot more power than we think we do when we get knocked down. We may not be able to stop the blow, but we can determine how we move on from there. Or, if we move on. Sometimes we get stuck in that place of hurt, of being a victim, or because we think we belong there. We don’t. You always have the power to stop the misery that comes from the initial pain, and you definitely have the power from preventing it again.

Life teaches us things, or it’s meant to, if we are quick learners we only have to go through it once before we make a change to stop it from happening again, but there are many of us, myself included, who may need several times at bat before finally hitting that home run and moving on. I used to sit in my misery not knowing how to get out of it. I would harbor resentments for those involved, and myself for letting myself get or stay there, and just stay stuck, not knowing how to get out from under the pile of hurt I was finding myself in, and many times, not wanting to get out because staying in that place was a way to punish myself. We are not meant to stay in the place. We are meant to move on, to learn, make peace with what was done, make peace with our part, because yes, as I mention a lot, we typically have one, and move on. Let it go. Now, some things are easier to let go of than others, most of the time the ones that aren’t easy are the ones that are triggering something from our past. Something we haven’t dealt with or have been able to find peace around. This may have been the reason the pain happened in the first place, as a red flag that you are meant to deal with an issue from the past. When I hurt, I always ask myself, is this because of what has happened in the present, or is this something bubbling up from my past I still need to work on letting go? A lot of the time our feelings are tethered to experiences and feelings from our past, things we’ve buried deep, or refuse to let go of. Those will keep popping up in our present lives, often reeking havoc on relationships we have today. As I always say, what is the root of the matter? Where does it stem from? There are usually answers there, and ultimately a solution.

Finding the answers to those questions will usually help you to move on faster, to let your pain go, or to at least give it the amount of weight it deserves, without piling on more for optimum effect. I always go back to, what are the facts? The facts don’t lie. Our feelings can trick us, they often have far-reaching tentacles that reach far back in our lives, and can skew the truth of what the matter really is, but if we focus on the facts, they will usually point us in the right direction. Once we have the facts we can usually expedite a solution to let it go, much faster than when our feelings get into the mix. But our feelings can indicate what’s really going on. So don’t count them out entirely, just don’t use them as a barometer of what actually happened.

Acceptance is the key to most of our problems when we are feeling disturbed or hurt. Learn from what happened, make a note of what you could have done better, or what you learned, and let it go. If you choose to hang on, you’re only torturing yourself and causing yourself unnecessary pain, set yourself free and make a commitment to yourself to do better next time. After all, it’s pain that helps us grow the most, so look at it as just that, growth, and turn a seemingly negative experience into something you can use for the good. That’s how we do it SLAYER! SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: When you experience pain or get hurt do you sit in that hurt or work to move on? If you sit in it, why do you do that? How does that help you? How does that hurt you? What can you do to move on? What holds you back from doing so? How can you overcome that? Holding on to past hurt doesn’t serve you, it only holds you back, learn from the past and use that to make better choices moving forward. No one gets it right all the time, we are here to learn, so look for the lesson, and humbling look at your own actions, and let it go. You have the power to stop your own misery today, right now.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

How Do You Want To Feel?

I was speaking with a friend the other day about not feeling good about a situation and he turned to me and asked, “how do you want to feel.? That got me thinking. How did I want to feel? And as I started to think about it, I started to feel it. For a few moments I felt the way I wanted to feel, and that got me thinking. What action do I have to take so that I feel this way?

We often can get stuck in our feelings, and feelings can be tricky. They can be tied up in some many things and not necessarily with how we feel about our current situation, but can be tied to experiences and trauma from our past. I know for myself that there have been times on this journey where I gotten triggered by something, unbeknownst to me at the time, and I have reacted to how I’m feeling thinking it is a genuine feeling about where I am currently at, but it’s not. Something or someone has hit that trigger and it’s pulled up something that has nothing to do with the person standing in front of me. It used to baffle me. My hair-trigger reaction to things seemed to flare up immediately, and if I didn’t pause to think about why I might be feeling the way I was I would just react and react to whomever was standing in front of me, only to feel badly later on, or, if I was really not present, blame them for something that they were never involved in at all.

With the help of counseling and therapy I now have a better sense of what those triggers mean and what the root of them are, so that when one flares up, I can, when I take a moment, realize what the true source of that feeling is. Feelings tend to have a lot of baggage, and far-reaching tentacles in our lives. But feelings also aren’t’ facts. Feelings can tell us a lot about ourselves and what’s going on for us, but we can also manipulate them, or have a skewed perception, of what the true facts actually are. I used to romanticize a lot of things, or, make them far worse than they really were. It was all about really high highs and really low lows for me, when really, a lot of those things, probably fell more in the middle. But the memory of them, and my feelings of them, where at either a 1 or a 10. and, I would get stuck there. To the point where it seemed like I either didn’t care or I was in a complete rage, with no warning. Sometimes that can still happen, and when it does I know I have more work to do there, it’s a sign that I still need to work on what that trigger is and how to make peace with it.

But back to feeling the way you want to feel. Just by thinking about that, you do feel that feeling. It’s like an instant shot, and it may only stay for a moments, until our brain kicks in and brings you back to reality, but, if it can do it for a few moments we know we can go there, it’s attainable, we can get it, so the next question is, how?

You know I’m always about taking action, it’s what keeps us on a positive path, and makes us warriors. So, what can you do today to feel the way you want to feel? When you ask yourself that, the answers come, and if they don’t, just start by taking some positive action, any positive action, and keep asking yourself that same question. Sometimes, we can’t do it alone, I know I couldn’t at the beginning, and sometimes I still need the help of someone else, so don’t put pressure on yourself to have it all figured out right away, it takes practice, and there’s no prize for doing it alone.

Choose to feel the way you want to feel, and if you don’t, take action to go after that feeling. Even the thought of that makes me feel good. Take action to feel good SLAYER.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you tend to get stuck in the way you are feeling and feel like there’s no way out? How would you rather feel than how you’re feeling right now? What can you do to attain that, or, get closer to it? What have you tried in the past? What has worked? What hasn’t worked? What have you still not tried? What would you like to try? Try it SLAYER. Think right now, about how you want to feel, and before your brain kicks in to say you can’t, say yes I can, and go after that feeling. SLAY on!

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Ignoring something doesn’t make it go away, it usually does the opposite, the longer you neglect something, the bigger it becomes. Things are only as big as we give them power to be, tackle them early, and they stay right-sized.

New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Problems

Ignoring The Facts Doesn’t Make Them Go Away

You can’t pretend the facts don’t exist.
You may ignore them, twist them, or bury them deep—but they don’t vanish.

When we avoid truth—because it’s too painful, too inconvenient, or too scary—we don’t protect ourselves. We injure ourselves.

Truth, no matter how sharp, is the foundation for growth. Without grounding in what is, we drift into fiction, stories, and confusion.

The Temptation to Deny

Feelings are persuasive. Our minds can convince us “this isn’t happening,” “that person didn’t mean it,” or “I’ll worry tomorrow.”

I used to be a master at it. I saw only what I wanted to see to preserve my story. Over time, I blurred the line between fact and fantasy until I couldn’t tell the difference.

But ignoring the truth doesn’t erase it—it delays the consequences. The costs only build: regret, confusion, broken relationships, self-betrayal.

Avoidance is a short-term refuge with long-term bankruptcy.

When Facts Feel Too Heavy to Hold

Sometimes the facts we need to face are terrifying.

  • “This relationship is toxic.”

  • “I’m not being honest with myself.”

  • “I’ve been settling.”

The pull to deny them is real. It’s easier to live in a comfortable lie than wrestle with the weight of truth.

But the irony is this: truth brings liberation. Even when it hurts, it frees you from the prison of your own illusions.

What the Facts Give You

When you embrace reality—even the parts you don’t like—you gain:

  • Clarity. You see what’s actually happening, not what you fear is happening.

  • Authority. You can act from truth, not fear.

  • Power. You no longer cede control to illusions or assumptions.

  • Growth. You move forward with integrity instead of spinning in confusion.

Facts aren’t magic. They don’t always heal instantly. But they give you the platform to heal intentionally.

How to Face the Facts

It takes courage—and consistency. But here’s how you begin:

  1. Ask yourself: What do I know to be true?
    In moments of chaos, pause. What fact can you anchor to—no matter how small?

  2. Stop arguing with evidence.
    When you catch yourself resisting what’s clear, name it: “I’m fighting the facts because I’m scared.”

  3. Document what you see.
    Journaling, voice notes, voice memos—let the truth come out in the light.

  4. Let the facts guide action.
    Knowing something is true isn’t passive. Use it to make decisions, to set boundaries, to course-correct.

  5. Practice radical acceptance.
    Acceptance doesn’t mean liking what is. It means not wasting your energy resisting it. Use your focus for forward motion.

Truth in the Toolbox

I now carry “facts” in my SLAY toolbox—tools I use daily.
They help me discern between inner drama and real problems.
They help me take responsibility where I need it, and release what isn’t mine.
They help me walk confidently in my life, not guided by fear.

Yes, sometimes facts will cut deep. But you’re meant to walk through the fire—not be burned by it.

SLAY Reflection

  1. What facts in your life are you avoiding or denying?

  2. How has ignoring them hurt you—emotionally, mentally, relationally?

  3. What’s one small truth you can own today (even if it feels scary)?

  4. How might your life shift if you stopped arguing with evidence?

  5. What action can you take now based on what is, not what you wish it were?

S – Stop ignoring what you already know
L – Let truth, not fear, be your guide
A – Act from what you see, not what you imagine
Y – Yield to integrity—let your life be shaped by real facts

Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one fact you’ve been avoiding—and how could facing it change your life?
Share your reflection in the comments. Let’s grow together in honesty.

And if you know someone who’s trapped by denial or stories, send this to them.
Sometimes, truth is the first arrow we need to slay illusions.

Shutter Shame

How often have we let shame get in the way of living the life we want to have? How often have we let it limit us, hinder us, and diminish us? We think our shame is a way to protect us from being hurt, from being rejected, from allowing others to see who we really are, because we believe we are not good enough. All of this thinking is false. Shame isn’t real. We can make it real by believing in it, by buying into it, but it’s no more real than The Boogeyman, or whatever else we hid from as a child. We give it life by feeding into it’s energy. We give it permission to be active in our lives. We let it in by and let it grow by not talking about it, not sharing with others, and believing it’s lies.

Shame can manifest from many places. Childhood trauma, addiction issues, or even just the failure in something you place importance and value in. Once we have let shame in we typically engage in a series of behaviors as a result of feeling shame, we try to cover up our perceived flaws by overcompensating, by blaming and shaming others, by perfectionism, by lying, or by isolating thinking we don’t deserve or are not good enough to engage with others. Shame has a ripple effect, it’s not just our own stinking thinking that disrupts our lives, but it ripples out to all relationships we have affecting us personally and professionally. Shame holds us back from connecting, from sharing, from allowing us to be our best selves and from celebrating that. Shame steals our light and causes us to choose self-destructive behaviors to reaffirm shame’s negative voice that you are less-than and not good enough.

But really, shame doesn’t exist. Not unless we let it. When you think about it, you can’t touch shame, smell shame, taste shame, it’s not really there, so why do we give it so much power? Why do we have so much fear around it, when, only we can give it the power to hurt us? Why would we turn our power over to something that, when we let it, becomes so strong it can manifest itself physically in our lives? Many of us, while in shame, will feel flush, dizzy, have tunnel vision, have an inability to focus, hear loud noises in our ears, feel a tightness in our chest, have shallow breath, or not be able to make eye contact. When we’re experiencing this level of shame, we have lost control. We have completely given into it. So, how do we overcome the shame we feel and allow ourselves to be who we are meant to be, flaws, and all, and not only be that person, but be proud of who we are?

First, shame is a feeling and feelings are not facts. As I say all the time, what are the facts? What do we know to be true? If the answers start with “I feel,” that’s shame talking, not what is fact. Second, shame can’t thrive when we talk about it, when we share how we’re feeling with others, it diminishes it’s power. When we talk about our truth it brings in the light, shame can only survive in the darkness. Also, when we share, we realize that shame is not a unique feeling to just you, we all can relate, and when we feel a sense of connection of our common experiences shame starts to die and our relationships get stronger, and we feel a bigger bond to those around us, we realize that we are all the same, and that really, there is nothing to be ashamed of, we all make mistakes, we all fall, we all have lessons in life we need to learn, we shouldn’t feel shame over not getting something right the first time, or at all, because our path and our journey is on it’s own timeline, not someone else’s.

We all feel shame from time to time, but when we live as our authentic selves, when we share our feelings and connect with others, shame goes and hides. We have the power to stop shame in it’s tracks by not apologizing for who we are and who and what we love. Things may not look the way we think they should, but they look the way they are supposed to look, it’s up to us to find the good within that place, and to change those things we can that we feel we can do better. Tell shame to hit the curb, it has no place in your life SLAYER, practice self-love and acceptance and allow yourself to make mistakes, there is no shame in that.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you feel a sense of shame about yourself? Are there certain events or incidents that you carry around as badges of your shame? What are they? Have you ever told anyone about them? Why not? What do you think will happen if you do? What do you think is happening because you don’t? When you think about your shame, is it based in reality? Or is it based on your own perception of how think it should have looked or should look? Is it based on what others think it should look like? All that matters is that you live in your truth, through the highs and lows, just be you, no one gets it right all the time, it’s part of our journey and part of this path, shed your shame and shine bright, celebrate everything that is you, and take your power back over shame.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Today I’m Feeling Blue

I write this today not because I want people to ask me how I’m doing, or to tell me it’s going to be OK, I know that, and please, I’m fine, but I write this today because it’s important to acknowledge how we feel. I’ve written before how it’s OK not to be OK, and it is, but I think when things are not OK, or they don’t feel OK, or we’re just feeling down, we don’t always voice it, and it’s just as important to voice that truth as it is when we’re doing great.

When I first stepped on this path and I started attending regular support groups, it was great to hear people making progress and how their lives had improved, but it was just as important, and maybe even more so, to hear when people were going through a rough patch because if I wasn’t feeling great that day I knew I wasn’t the only one, and that because I wasn’t feeling great I wasn’t doing it wrong, it was just the ebb and flow of life. So, that is why I share this with you today.

What is going on? It’s been an emotional week in a lot of ways, some things have come up from my past, I’m working on getting something new started and am excited about that, and there some things that are out of control that I’m frustrated with, so good and bad, the ebb and flow, but I think it has just weighed down on me emotionally. I do a lot of things every day, I wear a lot of hats, and I do always take time for myself and recharge, but sometimes I just feel heavy. And I’m feeling heavy.

Now I know this will pass, I have some really fun things to look forward to this weekend, and I have a lot to be grateful for, and I am, and when I get to this place emotionally, I know that means it’s time to get to work, to look at what is weighing me down and come up with some solutions of how I can make those lighter, or what I am able to change. It’s rare now that I have these days, it feels so foreign to me now, I used to live my life in these days, one after the next, so to have one pop up only once in a while is the result of a lot of hard work, work that I know to do to move past this place I’m currently in.

It’s a good time to take stock, to look at my life, the people in it, the choices I’m making, and see if all of it is aligned with who I aim to be, who I’ve worked to be, who I aspire to be, to look at what can change, or maybe what needs to change. Me feeling heavy is a sign that some things are off, or I’m holding on to some things I need to let go. We can only ignore the things we should be addressing for so long before they all catch up to us, they don’t typically go away unless we send them away. So it’s a time for me to take some extra time for myself, to reflect, to get quiet, to recharge and to take action.

Again, I write this today because I made a commitment and a vow to myself to always be honest here at STATE OF SLAY, and today, this is my honest self, and I do that because I always encourage you to do the same and I always intend to stay accountable for my own actions, so if you are also feeling blue to today I send you my love, we are in a position to make some changes, and that, really, is a great place to be, and something we have control over. If you are feeling blue you are not “doing life wrong” you are feelings your emotions and you may have some things you need to address. We get to decide the narrative of our story, we get to decide if we’re going to have a good day or bad day, and even though I may have a heavy heart, I am still going to have a good day, because I am choosing to, and when I choose to and I choose to focus on the good I will find myself in the good, and that I know to be true, and you will too. SLAY on.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you acknowledge when you are feeling down? Do you tell people? Do you have a special someone you confide in? How do you feel after you share your truth? Do you sometimes find a solution by sharing your truth with someone else? Do feel lighter after sharing your truth? If you don’t share your truth, why not? What holds you back? What do you do to release it? Do you release it? What changes or actions can you take today to release some things you may be hanging on to? What do you need to let go? Let go of what you no longer need, or what weighs you down, let it go, and set yourself free. Smile SLAYER, it’s going to be OK.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Talk Live Video

Hey SLAYER! Didn’t join us tonight for SLAY TALK LIVE, here’s what you missed!

Are You Afraid Of The Solution?

We can get so used to living in our own darkness that we let fear keep us from a solution. Our brain tells us that we can’t get better, our fear backs that up with unhelpful thoughts that are based on old information and stories that don’t have to be, or may not be, our present, but if we let them dictate our lives, they will continue to hold us back, and they’ll keep telling us those same old stories and those same old fears will keep us from getting well. We have the power each day to make better choices for ourselves, to take positive steps that will walk us into the light, to give us tools to live a life we deserve, and one that can be our “new normal.” It’s incredible how much pain many of us endure, at our own hands, because it’s what we’ve come to know, and even though we may not be happy there, we stay, because it’s the normal we do know, the thought of stepping out of that normal into something healthier, brighter, and better may be so scary we’d rather stay in the dark and continue to suffer there, even though there may be solutions all around us, and, people to help us get there. We are the only ones standing in our own way of recovery, or a better way of life. And as hard is it may be to believe for someone looking in at us, we might even be hanging on to that part of our life, not wanting to let go and set ourselves free. We may identify with it so much that the thought of it no longer being a part of our lives may leave us wondering who we would be without it. Who we would be, and could be, is our authentic selves. The people we were meant to be, who we aspire to be, who we can be. We can have all of the things we would like, it is going to take work, likely a lot of it, but there is no better person to invest in than yourself. Change can be scary, but look at it like you are giving yourself a software update, you are still you, but with some upgraded features to make you run more smoothly, more secure, and maybe with some new apps, or bells and whistles to make your life run easier.

All sounds good right? So what holds us back. Our friend fear. I talk a lot about find out the facts, well, fears aren’t facts, they are feelings, and feelings aren’t always accurate information, feelings can have all kinds of things attached to them that we’re not even aware of, things from our past, things that haven’t even every happened. When we live in fear we are not living in the present moment, we are living in the past or the future, when we live in the present moment, and are always looking at the facts we have, what we know to be true for sure, we are safe, we can make sound decisions, and we can start to let go of those fears that haunt us. Our brains like things to stay the same, they like to know what’s coming next, or what the outcome will be, and when things are changing fear likes to jump in and tell us it’s protecting us, but it’s really holding us back. It’s when we walk through those fears that they start to lose their power over us, and when we practice walking through those fears, our brain stops telling us to be afraid because it now has proof that when we’ve made changes everything is still OK, in fact, it’s probably more than OK and is better, so it stops trying to, well, stop us. The trick is to walk forward even if you’re in fear and trust that if you’re doing something that is for your greater good, that it’s going to be OK, and if it’s not, then you’ve learned a valuable lesson to be used for the next time, but even that is good, it’s learning, it’s growth.

I know for myself when I started to get better it felt very uncomfortable, I felt uncomfortable in my own skin because I was used to wearing the skin that I had been wearing for years and years, and even that skin didn’t feel good, I knew what that skin felt like, it was familiar to me, and when I started to make changes in my life, that skin no longer felt good, but neither did the new skin, it felt foreign, but I was told from many who had walked this path before me that it would feel uncomfortable at first, but to keep wearing it because one day it would feel great, it was just my brain trying to pull me back to the place I had been. I learned to get comfortable in the uncomfortable, and now I know when I’m there it’s because I’m changing, and, that’s a good thing. In fact, when I get too comfortable I know that’s the time to challenge myself again, that I’ve gotten lazy, so now that comfortable place I used to sit in is no longer desirable because I want to continue to grow and continue to challenge myself.

I know you can do this, I did, and I doubted I could many times when I began this journey, but I just kept putting on foot in front of the other, and I surrounded myself with like-minded people to support me on my journey. Walk through your fear, let go of the past, and step into who you are meant to be.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you let your past dictate your present? How do you do this? Why do you do this? How do you think it hurts you? What step can you take today to overcome this? Do you think you let the comfort of staying where you are keep you from moving forward? Why do you think you do this? What fears keep you from moving forward? What are these fears based on? How can you overcome them? SLAYER, I know you have it in you to become your best self, but you have to work to move forward each day, and on those days when you fall back, and you will, you have to get right back up again and keep trudging forward, as someone who has walked before you, I promise, the more steps you take, the easier the journey becomes. SLAY on.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! When we know the facts we are safe.

SLAY on!

State Of Slay Knowledge

Knowledge Is Power

I used to be a “I don’t wanna know” kind of gal. I would put off going to the Doctor or looking into something I didn’t really want to know the answer to, or was afraid of. Consequently, by the time I would find out the answers is was generally too late to do anything about it because that opportunity had passed. I write a lot about finding out the facts, or focusing on the facts, and that, when we have the facts, we are safe. But we can take that one step further with, when we have knowledge, we have power. For instance, I was a passenger in a car accident this past summer, I got injured, not horribly, nothing was broken, but just your average car accident stuff, stiff neck, sore back, even though I was in pain I powered on, thinking it would right itself eventually. Well, it didn’t, so I started treatment, and it has improved over the past few months, but having just moved I had to switch doctors, and he ordered X-Rays, that sounded kind of scary, like, what if he finds out things are really bad in there, or, even worse, finds something else wrong? The old me would have avoided those X-Rays like the plague, coming up with excuses to not getting them, but now, even though I was nervous about the results, I went and got them done, because if there is something wrong, now is the time to correct it, not later when the body cannot be adjusted and has locked itself in to being a certain way. Looking at the X-Rays I learned a lot about my body, and why it does certain things, I gained knowledge, and, in the end, what I learned was that things weren’t nearly as bad as I had worried they might be, what is there is fixable, for the most part, and will help me live an active and healthy life, so, with that knowledge I know that everything will get better, and my Doctor now knows what plan of attack to start to get things back on track. I feel better having the knowledge about what is really going on and what it looks like, instead of just blindly going to treatment and trusting what’s being done is the right thing and helping. Now it’s not the unknown.

Why are we so afraid of the unknown? Why do we let it paralyze us? Why do we let it get in our way of taking care of ourselves and seeking out the best care? I know, for me, that even though I can have some fear around something, finding out the truth and learning about something I may not know about, far exceeds that fear, in fact, a lot of time it stomps all over it. Sometimes, gaining that knowledge takes some work, so we don’t do it, but if we’re not willing to work for ourselves, to help ourselves, then who are we willing to do the work for? If it’s for our well-being we should always be willing to do the work, no matter what it is, no one is certainly going to do it for us, nor can they most of the time, so invest in you, put in the work, put in the time, put in the energy to learn more about you and those things that affect you. I know, each of us carries around the baggage of our past of certain things having gone badly, but think about those times and ask yourself if you sought out the knowledge around those circumstances, did you get the facts? Sometimes no matter what we do there’s nothing we can do to change or better the outcome, but at least in those situations we can prepare ourselves for what’s coming, and possibly find a way to lessen the blow. Knowledge is always better than ignorance, or diversion, or not doing what’s best for you. Get the knowledge. Seek out the knowledge that helps you make the best decisions for you, that allows you to be our best you, and that gives you the tools to so you can help yourself.

Knowledge is power, don’t you want to arm yourself with as much power as you can?

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you always seek out the answers to a problem, or do you avoid them hoping they’ll fix themselves? Name 5 instances when a situation got worse because you didn’t take action. What could you have done differently? What can you do in the future to avoid this same result? Name some times when you did take action and found out the truth and got some answers. How did that make you feel? How was this better than ignoring it? Make a pledge to yourself SLAYER, to get as much knowledge as you can, to find the answers in any given situation, and to give yourself the power to make the right decisions for you, and perhaps, find a better path. SLAY on.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you