Love

Slay Talk Live Video

Hey SLAYERS! Missed us tonight for SLAY TALK LIVE? Not to worry, I’ve got you covered.

SLAY on!

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! You just have to meet us halfway, just as you are.

New blog goes up Sunday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Souls

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! There are cracks in everything, that’s how light gets in.

SLAY on!

State Of Slay Beauty

Never Give Up

I’m spending the weekend with two beautiful souls and have gotten into some lengthy conversations about our stories, our journeys and what has brought us to where we are. Each of us has had a bumpy road, some of the bumps unique to each of us, but many we share in the commonality of having overcome them. As we’ve talked and shared it has brought up emotions, memories, parts of our lives, ourselves, we haven’t thought of for a while, or perhaps buried deep, but as we share from the places we are today, the other side of that turmoil, those challenges, the struggles, it is a reminder to never give up.

I almost did. I thought giving up was the only way to make the pain stop. To end my suffering. I let the darkness wash over me, consume me, and once I had let it take control, that was all I could see. I was a fighter, I was proud of what I had overcome in my life, I thought of myself as a warrior, but at some point my sword just got to heavy, and because I was not sharing my battles with anyone else, it ultimately was a fight I couldn’t fight alone, it was too powerful and the fight too long. I hated the idea of giving up and fought with every last bit of energy I had left before realizing that the one thing I was afraid to do, share my truth, was what was going to save me.

No one can do this alone. We’re not meant to. We each bring strength where others are weak, we each bring knowledge where others may lack it, together we are stronger. We  hold each other up when one of us has fallen, we lift each other up when we don’t have the strength to do it ourselves, and we remind each other to, above all else, never give up, because we are right there fighting with them.

There are so many warriors out there, more than you know, our heads will tell us no one cares, that everyone is to busy, that we don’t matter, but that’s a lie, we are all out here waiting to take action, we just don’t know we’re needed many times unless we are asked to. Sure, we can see when a soldier is down, but we can’t pick them up if they’re not wanting to get up, or don’t tell us that can’t do it on their own. It is up to each and every one of us to ask, to reach out, to take the action necessary to trigger us into action, because we will come, we will come in droves.

Every life is worth fighting for. Every person, every soul is special. Each of us has special gifts we can share and contribute, and if you don’t know what yours are, we’ll tell you. We know. We can see them, and appreciate them, we appreciate you.

Having walked through the darkness, having fought my way out of the pit of despair, I can tell you, it can be done, it wasn’t easy, it took a lot of work, and I didn’t do it alone. When I reached out for help, when I spoke my truth, there was an abundance of help around me, and more support than I could have imagined. The trick is to ask. To walk through the fear of sharing my story, my truth. To not listen to the voices that told me  not to.

Own who are you in this moment, and know that that is not who you have to be, you have the power to change your story, right here, right now. Never give up, always keep fighting, there is something great waiting on the other side of that battle. How do I know? I’m writing this from that side. Please, come and join me. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you suffer in silence? Why do you do that? Why don’t you reach out? Is your answer based in fact or the story you’ve been told or have crafted? Have you chosen the right people to surround yourself with? If not, find those people, look for people who are walking the path you want to be on. Find the people who are willing to help. They are out there. Sometimes it takes more than one try, don’t let that one no keep you in the dark. Keep looking, searching, they’re there, we’re here. Are you afraid of getting better? Do you think you deserve to get better? If not, why not? You do. You deserve to be your best you, to shine bright, to live in the light, don’t listen to people, or you if you’re telling yourself that. Fight. Find the light, even if it’s just a little spec on the ground, go to it, find it, hold on to it, that is enough to start. Share your truth, let the darkness out, and the light in, we’re all here to light the way.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Embrace those parts of you that don’t know they’re loved yet.

New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Butterflies

Slay Talk Live Video

Hey SLAYERS! Missed us tonight on SLAY TALK LIVE tonight? Not to worry, catch what you missed here.

A great chat with best-selling author Kelly Martin about Dealing With Anxiety.

Embracing Is Acing

Before walking this path the only thing I was embracing were the outside things I thought would fill me up. None of them ever did, not in the long-term. Sure I might get a hit of satisfaction or relief, but soon after that emptiness would creep back in. Back then, I couldn’t even fathom embracing something I deemed negative. Which, was pretty much everything in my life, including myself.

When I sought help and started to change my behaviors and embarked on a path of self-love, I had to learn to embrace all of those things I didn’t like. Those imperfections in myself, and in my life. Which was a lot to take on. I was pretty much unhappy about everything. But I started with learning to find acceptance first. And boy, that took some work, but learning to ease off, to let go, to look at each thing and ask if there was something I could do to change it, asking myself, honestly, why I didn’t like it, and using that information to move forward. If there was action I could take I had to take it, otherwise I was not permitted to complain about it. Fair enough. And if I wasn’t ready to take action, I would write down what the action should be, will be, because that was the only action I was ready to take in that moment. Finding acceptance for the things I couldn’t change came next. I felt frustrated, trapped, and discouraged. But if I was going to get better I had to learn to let those things go, they weren’t serving me, they were only bringing me down.

And that’s it really. It’s taking a look at our lives and what is helping us and what is pulling us back, or keeping us staying stuck, and then doing something about those things that aren’t helping us get to where we want to be, or, robbing us of our peace and serenity. There are a lot of things I have no control over, and once I was able to let them go the happier I became. In terms of myself, I was eventually not only able to let go of my hate, judgment, or disappointment for those things n myself I didn’t like, I learned to embrace them. Embracing my flaws made them my assets. And yes, there are some that do hold me back, but the more I practice living in the light and living in my truth, the more those personal flaws start to lessen their grip on me.

As you know, I am a big believer in contrary action. Doing the opposite of what we’ve always done. That is the only way to get different results. And when we practice contrary action not only do the results change, but so do we. Our self-confidence grows, our self-esteem gets bigger, we start to love ourselves for who we are, and we start to see what makes us special. We learn to embrace who we are, all of who we are, and we begin to live a life that supports that love and is more loving to ourselves. When we are embracing we are acing. A reminder that we need to embrace our true selves, it’s only then that we begin to ace life, in whatever that means for you. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you struggle with embracing who you are, flaws and all? What holds you back? Why do you think you have trouble? The reasons you’ve cited, are they stories from your past that you’ve continued to hold on to? Let them go, those stories are old, and no longer you, only if you allow them to control your present. Write out who are you, as a person, what makes you you, write out your hopes and dreams, and then write down what holds you back. What can you do to diminish or get rid of those things that hold you back? Maybe even embrace them and make them work in your favor. You can SLAYER, if I can you can, I believe in you. Start looking at those things as something positive, something you can overcome, work around make you stronger to go after those things you want in your life, to be the best version of you. Take charge and focus on what you can do to move forward, and letting go of the rest. Embrace who you are and what you are, and you’ll see many of those obstacles fall way.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! You have two hands, one for helping yourself, and one for helping others.

New blog goes up Tuesday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Hands

Held With Invisible Hands

I talk a lot about how STATE OF SLAY is a community of like-minded people who love and support each other through their journeys. We talk about carrying a torch for each other, lighting someone’s path when it gets dark. And, I talk about walking next to you on your path as I walk on mine. But we are also all held by invisible hands. We are supported by all the hands of the many SLAYERS around the world, we may not see those hands, but they are there, guiding us, giving us strength, loving us, and cheering us on when we are victorious, or just need a hand to hold. Those hands are always there.

I was thinking about that the other day. I feel you all with me, all the time. Even though we are in different time zones, different parts of the world and on different parts of our paths, we walk as one, and as I often say, no one gets left behind.

Our hands are always stretched out for those in need, they are there to embrace one another in greeting, or in love and support, they hold the hands of others to help when it’s hard to speak, or share our truth, our hands can’t be broken, they make a chain, a link, to all of us, and that chain continues to grow.

I walked most of my life alone. And I felt alone. When I think of all of you out there I know I’m not alone, you are all with me each day and I can feel your hands around me, I hope you can feel ours too. And maybe that’s something to focus on, when we feel anxious, nervous, unsure, visualize those hands with you, holding you, giving you strength, because they’re there, and just by seeing them in your mind, they may give you exactly what you need in that moment.

We share a common goal, we share many common experiences, and we walk this shared path to becoming our best selves. We can’t do that alone, I know I can’t, I tried, and, it’s so much better to do it with others you know, you love, others who understand. Those outreached hands can also help us to learn. We can learn to trust again, or maybe for the first time, we learn that those hands are there when we reach for them, even when we don’t, they are always stretched out in our direction, we can depend on them, and we learn that we can stretch out ours, that it is safe and that we feel good when we do it. Those hands connect us to others, to old friends, to new friends, to those like us, we see that we are not alone, that who we are is OK, that we’re more than OK, that we are incredible and we should celebrate that.

Each and every one us is held up by invisible hands. Whether from this community, or others you may belong to. We are here to support one another, to lift each other up, to share this journey when it gets tough, and to show those who are struggling that it gets better, brighter, and that there is hope. All of our hands reach out to yours, we are always here, even when you don’t see us, we reach out to you, and hope you’ll reach out to us too. There is room for everyone on this path, and sometimes just to get by, it takes a lot of hands. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you feel supported either here within our community, or within one of your choosing? If yes, why? If not, why? If you don’t, what can you do to connect with others, or at least one person, who can walk with you and share your path with you? Is there something that stops you from connecting? What is it? Is that the truth, or is that a story from your past that is no longer valid? Only you can make it valid today, if it’s an old story, let it go, try something new, reach out to someone who you admire, who’s walking a path of being their authentic self, who will take you along with them. The only person we hurt by not reaching out is us, we lose every time, it is when we learn to overcome our fear to connect with others that our world opens up, it gets brighter, and we see those hands reaching out for us. I challenge you SLAYER, reach out to one new person this week, talk to them, meet up with them, and share with them, you can never have too many hands.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYERS! What would you say today to your younger self?

New blog goes up Sunday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Relationship