I used to live in could’ve, would’ve, should’ve, might’ve. I would get stuck in the past and replaying it over and over, reliving a moment and what I should’ve done, should’ve said or could’ve done better. I was constantly pulled back to my past, or daydreaming of the future and would might be, while present moments slipped by. What I didn’t realize is that in the present moments were chances to do the would’ve, could’ve, should’ve, might’ve actions, but I was missing them because I was living in the past, or, future surfing into what hadn’t even happened yet. Life gives us opportunities to do the could’ve, would’ve, should’ve, might’ves if we are able to spot them as they come up. When we get stuck in the past we stay there, missing those opportunities the universe is giving us to do the things we wished we had done differently.
For me, I did this constantly, but I also used it was a way to not take action in my present life. I would stay in the past, thinking, in hind-sight, I was so smart to see how I should’ve done things, but not allowing myself to see that those same situations were coming up and giving me a chance to implement those “great ideas” I had, because the truth is, I didn’t want to change, I didn’t want to do the work and take the right action, it was easier to keep doing what I had always done, get the same results, and then talk about how it should have been done. But that behavior kept me in the dark, it kept me isolated from people and it kept me sick. And wishing, on bad days, that things would change, wasn’t ever going to change anything, I needed to change and I needed to make positive changes in my behavior and actions in the present to secure that life I wanted moving forward. Those changes took a lot of humility. I had to first admit my faults, and admit that I had kept myself from moving on, moving forward and growing, I had let my ego run the show and because I was at fault, the only place it could take me where I could feel superior was the past.
Today I live in the now. I do use the past to help me today, to show me right from wrong, where I can do better, but I don’t live there. Only by living in the now can I stop myself from bending backwards to my past or tip-toeing into the future, and only in the now can I take action for today and set myself up for better choices in the future. Living in the now also stops me from trying to take on things I have no control of, or from trying to take on too much, the whole picture, when all I really have is today. Many times before walking this path I would get so overwhelmed with everything I had to do that I would never actually start, but when I look at what’s in front of me, in the moment, I can break things down into what’s important, what I can do right now and work my way through that list, and before I know it, I’ve made progress. That way of life helps me to keep balance.
Make sure to make room for today. It’s great to learn from the past, but don’t live there, if you do, you may just miss those opportunities to right those wrongs that pull you back and you may hold yourself back from where you are meant to be. SLAY on!
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you find that you get pulled back into your past? Are there specific times or events that you go to? Is there something you can change about those times or events? What can you take away or learn from them that you can apply to your life today? Do you think that there may have been opportunities to change patterns in your life based on your past experiences, but because you’re stuck in the past you’ve missed those opportunities in the present? What can you do to live in the now today? How can you look for situations that may have come up in your past that you now have a chance to make right, or make better decisions? Look for the those moments SLAYER, to use what you’ve learned from your past to take positive action today, in your present, and set yourself up for a brighter future.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you
