Good morning SLAYERS! We cannot become what we want by remaining what we are.
New blog goes up Tuesday, until then… SLAY on!
Slay Say
Take Yourself Off The Wheel
Nothing changes if nothing changes.
For years, I did the same things over and over again, expecting different results.
I thought if I kept applying the same approach—harder, louder, longer—somehow life would finally cooperate.
It didn’t.
Every time I repeated the same behavior, I got the same result.
The only thing that changed was how frustrated and exhausted I became.
And when I hit that familiar wall of fear, frustration, and anxiety, the noise in my head got louder—until it drowned out everything else.
I felt stuck. Paralyzed. Powerless.
But the truth?
I had the power all along.
It started with one bold choice: stepping off the wheel I’d been running on for years.
Change Is Uncomfortable—And That’s Okay
Change can feel scary.
Unfamiliar.
Uncomfortable.
Sometimes that discomfort makes us hesitate.
Other times, it’s self-sabotage in disguise—we tell ourselves it’s safer to stay where we are.
That we’re not capable of change.
That we don’t deserve it.
That nothing will really be different anyway.
But that’s a lie.
There is always a way out—or at least a better way forward.
We just have to be willing to take it.
Discomfort Means You’re Growing
If it feels uncomfortable, that’s probably a sign you’re doing the right thing.
It means you’re stepping into new territory.
It means you’re trying something different.
It means you’re finally breaking the cycle.
Change is rarely easy.
But staying stuck is harder.
What helped me most was shifting how I thought about change—not as something to fear, but as something that could bring growth, healing, and expansion.
We aren’t meant to stay where we are forever.
We’re meant to evolve.
To move forward.
To learn and grow.
And that means we have to be willing to do things differently, even when it feels awkward, messy, or uncertain.
The Power of a Single Step
Stepping off the wheel doesn’t require a perfect plan.
It just requires a step.
Even if the first thing you try doesn’t work, you’ll learn something.
That one step might be what sets everything else in motion.
The journey is the point—not just the outcome.
We are not victims of our circumstances.
We may not control every situation, but we can always control how we show up, how we respond, and what we’re willing to change.
Without that inner work, even if we move into new circumstances, we may find ourselves facing the same old patterns in a new setting.
Real change starts from the inside.
It’s Time to Get Off the Wheel
Change takes effort.
But that effort is an investment in you.
In your dreams.
In the life you want.
In the person you’re becoming.
Be willing.
Be curious.
Be brave enough to say yes to what’s new, even if it feels a little scary at first.
You’ve been running in circles long enough.
It’s time to stop the spin.
Jump off the wheel.
And walk forward—with purpose.
SLAY Reflection: Are You Ready to Do Things Differently?
- Do you find yourself resisting change?
What feels uncomfortable or threatening about it? - Are you happy with where you are in life?
If not, what steps have you taken—or avoided—to shift it? - What patterns have you repeated that no longer serve you?
Why do you think you’ve stayed in them? - What is one small change you can make today that would move you forward?
What would it feel like to say yes to that? - What truth are you avoiding because it would require change?
And what freedom might be waiting on the other side?
Call to Action: Join the Conversation
I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one change you’ve made—or know you need to make—to get off the wheel and create real momentum in your life?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.
And if you know someone who’s stuck in a cycle they’re ready to break, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a nudge.
Slay Say
Good morning SLAYERS! Do not tolerate disrespect, not even from yourself.
New blog goes up Sunday, until then… SLAY on!
Examine What You Tolerate
I used to tolerate a lot.
From other people.
From myself.
I let things slide to avoid conflict.
I ignored red flags because I didn’t want to make waves—or because I was too emotionally and mentally exhausted to face the truth.
And so I allowed bad behavior to take up space in my life, even when it was actively hurting me.
But life isn’t meant to be tolerated.
It’s meant to be lived.
To be enjoyed.
To challenge us, to teach us, and to help us grow.
When we start making excuses for the people, places, and patterns in our lives just so we can “get through” them, we’re not being brave—we’re betraying ourselves.
Tolerating the Things That Keep Us Down
When I was living in the dark, I let most things go—unless I was looking for a fight.
And on the days I was angry at myself, I was often searching for someone else to blame.
I played the victim like it was my role in life.
I pointed fingers outward instead of inward.
And I tolerated behaviors in myself I knew deep down were harmful.
That was the first place I had to start when I began my recovery:
What was I tolerating in myself that was keeping me sick?
Justifying What Needs to Go
I had made excuse after excuse for the choices I was making.
One bad decision would snowball into another, and I would justify every one of them.
I ignored warning signs.
I surrounded myself with people and situations that reinforced my belief that I wasn’t worthy of more.
And I used those experiences as proof that I was a victim of life, rather than someone who had the power to change.
Even when good people showed up in my life, I didn’t know how to let them in.
I had grown more comfortable with pain than with peace.
And that realization was sobering.
From Tolerating to Choosing
As I got honest with myself, I began to see just how much of my pain I had been allowing.
And once I saw it, I couldn’t unsee it.
So I took a stand.
First with myself—by refusing to continue the behaviors that hurt me.
Then outward—by looking at every person, place, and pattern through the lens of self-love.
If it wasn’t helping me grow…
If it wasn’t rooted in respect, support, or truth…
It had to go.
Letting go wasn’t always easy.
But every goodbye made more space for peace.
The Practice of Daily Self-Respect
Even now, as life moves fast and new challenges arise, I have to keep checking in.
When I start tolerating things that don’t serve me, I feel it.
The darkness creeps back in.
The negative voices get louder.
And I know—it’s time to realign.
Self-love isn’t a one-time decision.
It’s a daily practice.
And part of that practice is examining what you’re tolerating—and having the courage to release what no longer honors you.
SLAY Reflection: What Are You Still Tolerating?
- What have you been tolerating in your life that feels heavy, harmful, or out of alignment?
Why are you still holding onto it? - How have your own actions contributed to the pain or frustration you feel?
What patterns need to be disrupted? - Are there people or relationships in your life that take more than they give?
What would it feel like to set boundaries—or let them go? - What excuses have you made for staying in situations that don’t serve you?
Where did those excuses come from? - What would change if you stopped tolerating what hurts you—and started choosing what heals you?
What’s the first step?
Call to Action: Join the Conversation
I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one thing you’ve tolerated for too long—and how are you ready to honor yourself by letting it go?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.
And if you know someone who’s carrying things they no longer have to, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a nudge.
Slay Say
Good morning SLAYERS! How many tabs does your brain have open?
New blog goes up Friday, until then… SLAY on!
Slay Say
Good morning SLAYERS! You can’t control the wind but you can adjust your sails.
SLAY on!
Today I Will Not Stress Over Things I Cannot Control
Easier said than done, right?
Especially now.
It feels like everything—from the world at large to our daily lives—is spiraling beyond our control.
And it’s true: most of life really is outside of our hands.
No matter how hard we try to will something into existence or change an outcome, some things just are.
But here’s the truth I’ve come to live by:
I may not be able to control what happens around me—but I can control how I respond to it.
And that’s where the power is.
The Illusion of Control
When I was living in the dark, I was consumed by control.
Trying to manage everything and everyone.
Manipulating, bargaining, obsessing—believing that if I could just control the situation, I could finally feel safe.
But no matter how hard I tried, life had other plans.
It didn’t care how hard I worked to bend it to my will.
And I exhausted myself trying.
The more I tried to control, the more unmanageable everything became.
It didn’t just wear me out—it wore me down.
My mental health suffered.
My self-worth took a hit.
And I lost myself in the process.
Letting Go Was the Turning Point
When I finally made the decision to change my life, I was told something that made me flinch:
“You have to accept that you can’t control everything.”
That one sentence lit up every fear I had.
I didn’t want to hear it.
But I needed to.
Because as terrifying as letting go felt, holding on was doing more damage.
So I started small.
I worked on myself.
I practiced gratitude.
I focused on the good.
And I gave back where I could.
Slowly, the need to control started to loosen its grip.
And I began to feel something I hadn’t felt in a long time: peace.
The Freedom in Acceptance
Letting go doesn’t mean giving up.
It means accepting reality as it is—and choosing to move forward anyway.
It means doing what you can, where you are, with what you have.
It means focusing on your choices, your behavior, your energy—not the chaos around you.
And when you feel that old need for control creeping in?
Put the focus back on yourself.
Or do something kind for someone else.
It’s a powerful reset.
Because the truth is, trying to control what’s out of your hands only ends up controlling you.
What I Can Do Today
There are still plenty of things I can’t control—and many of them deeply disturb me.
But I’ve learned that obsessing over what I can’t change doesn’t help.
What does help?
Doing what I can.
I show up for myself.
I show up for others.
I make better choices.
And I leave the rest.
Because acceptance isn’t giving up—it’s breaking free.
SLAY Reflection: Where Are You Holding On Too Tight?
-
Do you stress over things that are out of your control?
What are they—and how do they affect your peace? -
How has your need for control shaped your relationships, habits, or mental health?
What patterns do you see? -
What’s one area of your life where you could let go a little more today?
How would that feel? -
What are you really afraid of when you try to control everything?
Is it fear of failure? Rejection? Uncertainty? -
What would shift if you focused on your response, rather than the outcome?
Where can you put your energy to use in a healthier way?
Call to Action: Join the Conversation
I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one thing you’re ready to stop stressing over because you’ve realized it’s out of your control?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.
And if you know someone who’s stuck in the loop of control and frustration, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a nudge.
Slay Say
Good morning SLAYER! Grow through what you go through.
New blog goes up Tuesday, until then… SLAY on!
Faith Is Hope With A Track Record
Some days, it’s harder to write than others.
Especially on the days when my light feels dim, when I’m tired, and when the fire that usually fuels me flickers a bit lower.
Today is one of those days.
And yet—these are often the days I most need to write.
To remind myself of what I know deep down:
This moment will pass.
This weight I’m feeling isn’t forever.
And no matter how disconnected or overwhelmed I feel, I’ve made it through harder days than this.
Faith reminds me of that.
Life may feel uncertain and unsteady at times, but faith is what brings me back to center.
Because faith isn’t just a feeling—it’s a belief rooted in evidence.
It’s hope that’s been tested. And proven.
From Hopelessness to Hope
Before I began this journey, I didn’t have much faith.
In fact, I didn’t even have much hope.
My mind always defaulted to the worst-case scenario.
And on the rare occasion I dared to hope, I quickly snuffed it out with a familiar voice in my head that told me I didn’t deserve good things.
But then someone shared their story with me.
Where they had been.
What they had come through.
And where they were now.
That single story sparked something.
A flicker of hope.
It was small, but it was enough to help me pick up the phone and ask for help.
And that call changed everything.
How Faith Is Built
Hope came first.
Faith came later.
Because faith doesn’t magically show up—it builds over time.
It’s earned through experience, through consistent effort, and through the proof that change is possible when we do the work.
As I began taking positive steps in my recovery, I started to notice shifts in my life.
Support showed up.
Healing began.
My mental health improved.
And slowly, I started to believe that I could feel better.
That I could build a different kind of life.
That belief—backed by action—became my faith.
Faith Isn’t Passive. It’s a Practice.
Faith isn’t just sitting back and hoping things will change.
It’s rolling up your sleeves and doing the work because you believe change is possible.
Faith can be rooted in something greater than ourselves.
In a higher power.
In the belief that we’re being guided or protected.
But it’s also in the way we show up every day—especially on the hard days.
When we take small, positive actions even when we don’t feel like it.
When we keep moving forward, even if we’re unsure of the destination.
That’s faith in motion.
Share the Flame
Today, if you’re in a low place, remind yourself of what you’ve already overcome.
Look back at the track record of your survival, your growth, your strength.
Faith is built on the moments you didn’t think you’d get through—but did.
And if you’re struggling to find your faith today, start with hope.
Hold onto that spark and trust that it will grow.
If your flame feels dim, share it anyway.
Because when we pass our light to someone else, it only gets brighter.
SLAY Reflection: Are You Holding Onto Faith or Reaching for Hope?
-
Do you feel connected to your faith today?
If yes, how does it support you? If not, what’s made you feel disconnected? -
Did you always have faith—or did you find it later in life?
What helped you begin to believe again? -
When you think about hope, what comes up for you?
Are you nurturing it—or avoiding it? -
What action helped you move from hope into faith?
What did you do that built trust in your own journey? -
Who in your life might need a reminder that faith is possible?
How can you be the light that helps spark theirs?
Call to Action: Join the Conversation
I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one moment in your life where hope turned into faith—and how did that change your path?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.
And if you know someone who’s searching for that spark, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a nudge.
Slay Say
Good morning SLAYER! The best time for a new beginning is now.
New blog goes up Sunday, until then… SLAY on!
