Nothing changes if nothing changes. For years I did the same things over and over and expected different results. Like somehow, magically, things were going to work out when I was using the wrong solution, or I was going to somehow force life to go my way if I just kept repeating the same approach over and over. It didn’t. Each time I did the same thing I got the same result, the only thing that changed is I got more frustrated and angry that I wasn’t getting the results I wanted. And, when I was in a state of frustration, fear and anger, that negative committee in my head would start talking faster and louder until it drowned out any rational thoughts and I could no longer think and would find myself unable to make the next move. I felt powerlessness. But, I had the power to change all along, by actually making changes to change my situation. I had to take myself off the big hamster wheel I had been running on for years and start to do things differently.
Change can be scary, it can feel weird, uncomfortable, and we may feel resistant to it, there are those of us too who may steer away from change as a way of self-sabotage, to hold ourselves back in the place we are so we can continue the narrative that there is no way out and we are not capable of finding a way out even if there was, or, even deserving of it. In my experience there is always a way out, or, a better way, but that starts with the willingness to change, of doing things differently even if it’s uncomfortable, in fact, feeling uncomfortable probably means you’re doing the right thing because it’s something you’ve never done before. Change often does feel uncomfortable and sometimes the most difficult part of change is to not give up but to walk through the uncomfortableness of it and continue on. It often helps as well to stop thinking of change as a bad word, to embrace it and know that change can bring great things, it can challenge us, and it can get us to where we want to go, where we need to go. We aren’t meant to stay right where we are for the rest of time, we are meant to move forward, learn and expand who we are and what we are and without change we begin to paralyze ourselves by believing the place we find ourselves, even if it is not where we want to be, is where we have to be. We always have the power to get off that wheel and step aside, try something new, and even if it doesn’t work, know we tried, and that effort might lead us to a solution that works. The act of trying may just be what you needed to start your transformation and change, the journey is the point, not just the destination. We are not victims of our circumstances, we can find ways to improve where we are, but that work has to come from us, or it doesn’t stick, it doesn’t work, and we may find that even if we moved ourselves out of one situation, if we didn’t change to get there, we are in the same situation we were just in with different circumstances.
Change takes work, but that work is an investment in you, your life, what you want, what you deserve, what you’ve dreamed about. Be open to change, be willing to do the work, and practice saying yes to new things, to things and steps that may bring about the kind of changes that will improve your life, improve you as a person, and may improve the community around you. Stop running on the same wheel, jump off, roll up your sleeves and get to work on making change happen in your life. SLAY on.
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you resist change? If so, why? What don’t you like about it? What scares you about it? Are you happy with who and where you are? Have you made some changes to improve that? What have you done? What else can you do? If you haven’t made any changes, are you aware of changes you could make but haven’t? Why haven’t you? What change can you make today to improve your situation? What changes are you willing to make today? What do you know you need to change but are resistant to? What holds you back? The only one holding you back from the change you want to see is you. Make that change.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you