Author: Carrie Genzel

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Our greatest good is what we can do for others.

New blog goes up Tuesday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Change The World

Be A Conduit Of Good For Others

Before I began this journey, I often did good deeds—but if I’m honest, many were tied to expectations. I sought recognition, appreciation, or something in return. My actions, though seemingly kind, were often self-serving.

When I stepped into recovery, I was met with unconditional support. People offered help without expecting anything back. It baffled me. I waited for the catch, but it never came. Instead, they simply said, “Pay it forward.”

At first, I didn’t grasp the depth of that phrase. But as I started to help others without expecting anything, I felt a shift. Supporting someone else lifted me, too. It reminded me that even in my lowest moments, I had something to offer.

The Power of Selfless Acts

Helping others became a cornerstone of my recovery. Not grand gestures, but simple acts: a smile, a kind word, a listening ear. These moments connected me to others and grounded me in my own healing.

I learned that when I offer support without strings attached, it not only aids someone else but also reinforces my own growth. It’s a two-way street of healing and connection.

Letting Go of Expectations

True kindness doesn’t come with a scoreboard. When I stopped expecting reactions or rewards, my actions became more genuine. If someone didn’t respond as I’d hoped, I learned to let it go, sending them silent well-wishes instead.

This shift freed me from disappointment and allowed me to act from a place of authenticity and compassion.

Small Gestures, Big Impact

Being a conduit of good doesn’t require monumental efforts. It’s in the everyday moments: holding the door, offering a compliment, or simply being present. These small acts can have profound effects on someone’s day—and on our own hearts.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Reflect & Rise

  • Do you look for ways to be a conduit of good in your daily life?

  • Have you experienced someone paying it forward for you? How did that make you feel?

  • What can you offer to someone today?

  • How does giving without expectation shift your perspective?

  • How can you cultivate compassion for others—and yourself?

Call to Action: Join the Conversation
I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one way you’ll be a conduit of good today?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who might need a little hope, send this to them.
Sometimes, we just need a reminder that we matter.

Would you like me to create a WordPress excerpt and tags to go with this?

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Celebrate who you are and what you’ve been through, it’s prepared you for where you are right now…and, what’s to come.

New blog goes up Sunday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Celebrate

Yay! Congratulate Yourself, Especially For The Tough Sh*t

We recently got a puppy and are in the throes of house-training. We’ve had some hits, and some misses. A lot of misses. So when we get a hit, there’s a lot of celebration in the house. There’s always an immediate YAY and a lot of congratulations, and those celebrations aren’t just reserved for the wins at home, they can happen anywhere, and do. We laugh sometimes because, now, without even thinking about it, when our puppy does something good, we burst into yays, no matter where we are. And not only does she get excited, but it makes us laugh as well. It got me thinking today, in mid-yay, that we should cheer ourselves on just as much, maybe even throw out a verbal YAY when we do something great or something new. We all deserve some yays in our lives and some celebration.

Before walking this path, there very few yays in my life. What there was a lot of was negative self-talk. I was constantly telling myself I was stupid or had done something wrong, or even if something went well, I told myself I should have done it better. Nothing was ever good enough, and as a result I dug myself deeper and deeper into a depression. I didn’t feel worthy of praise. I was ashamed at how I was living my life, the things I was doing and if someone did praise me for something I thought they were lying, or they wanted something from me, I never trusted it, but I also didn’t trust myself.  I never gave myself any leeway to learn and grow, I expected myself to get it perfect right way, and when I didn’t, that kicked up right away which kept me in the dark.

The key to getting myself out of that cycle was learning self-love. A tall order at the start, but essential for my recovery, and, my survival. That negative self-talk had gotten so strong it was the only voice I was listening to, and I believed it when it said that I was never going to be good enough and everyone would be better off without me here. Learning that I was enough, that we all are works in progress, and that we learn the most from the things that don’t do our way, or, let me say it, failures, but, really, they’re not really failures because that’s where the most growth happens. In fact, in those failed attempts lies the most yays, in fact, walking through those failures and learning from them should be the loudest yays, and maybe even a little dance or hand clap. It’s most important to congratulate ourselves especially in the sh*t, we should make a point of it, in fact, I challenge you, next time, during one of those times to stand up and let out a loud YAY, because even though it may not feel like a victory in that moment, it truly is, and you’ll know why on the other side of it, so why not get the celebration started early?

We walk through a lot in our lives, and we’ve all been through some really tough things, but how often do you congratulate yourself for walking through those, and, making better choices today as a result? You may just owe yourself some yays for that. As I watch my puppy grow and learn, I realize that we are all still doing the same, we may be further along the path as someone just starting their life, but life is always teaching us new things, if we let it, so congratulate yourself as you learn each new thing. SL-YAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you celebrate who you are and what you’ve accomplished? If not, why not? What stops you? Write down an example of something you walked through that was difficult. Do you appreciate yourself for getting through that? Do you see how you learned from that experience? Do you see that perhaps you were meant to go through it to take away some valuable lessons and information? What did you take away from that experience that you use in your life today? When something goes well, or you accomplish a goal or project, do you congratulate yourself? If not, why not? If yes, how do you celebrate? Celebrate yourself everyday SLAYER, even just for getting out of bed today, hey, that’s an accomplishment in itself, and then, find as many yays in day as you can, maybe even say them out loud for some extra self-love.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go, they only determine where you start.

New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Dont Compare

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Let no one discourage you. You don’t need a fan club to achieve your goals. Be your own motivation.

SLAY on!

State Of Slay Ships

When Others Inject Their Fear Into Your Life

It takes courage to chase your dreams. To put yourself out there. To share your truth with the world, especially when that truth has been born from your soul. It’s vulnerable work. So naturally, we hope the people who love us will show up to support us.

But sometimes, they don’t.

And instead of encouragement, we get fear. Not our own—theirs. Projected through criticism, sarcasm, or silence. It can come from the people we least expect, and it can sting the most when it does. Their fear may show up as jealousy, pessimism, or even ultimatums. And suddenly, your moment of growth becomes a moment of conflict. One you never asked for.

Their Fear Is Not Yours to Carry

It’s important to remember: you are not responsible for making others comfortable with your growth.

You are not responsible for shrinking so someone else can feel tall.

We all carry our own insecurities, and when someone projects theirs onto you, it often has more to do with their inner struggle than with anything you’re doing wrong. You are not doing anything wrong by growing, dreaming big, or stepping into your light. In fact, you’re doing something incredibly right.

People who truly love you will want to see you win. Even if they don’t fully understand your path, they’ll respect that it’s yours. And they’ll support you because they care about your joy. If they can’t do that, then it may be time to lovingly step back and re-evaluate who gets to be in your inner circle.

The Subtle Ways Fear Shows Up

Not all fear looks like yelling or outright criticism. Sometimes it comes quietly:

  • The sarcastic comment

  • The deflating look

  • The unreturned text on a day that mattered to you

These passive reactions are just as powerful. And just as hurtful. Because they take up emotional space that you could be using to build, to dream, to thrive. When you’re busy decoding someone else’s discomfort, you lose time and energy that could be spent fulfilling your purpose.

And here’s the truth: people who inject fear or discouragement into your life when you are rising are not trying to protect you. They are trying to keep themselves from feeling left behind.

Let Yourself Rise Anyway

Your job is not to manage someone else’s emotions. Your job is to rise. To shine. To step into your purpose even when it makes others uncomfortable. You can do this with compassion, but you must also do it with conviction.

We rise by lifting others. But if someone refuses to rise with you, that’s not your fault. Let your light shine anyway. You never know who might see your light and be inspired to find their own.

SLAY on.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Reflect & Rise

  • Do you feel guilty when you succeed and others don’t?

  • Have you experienced people trying to discourage you from pursuing your goals?

  • Why do you think their fear shows up when you shine?

  • Have you ever dimmed your light to make someone else feel better?

  • What can you do to protect your peace and keep moving forward?

You don’t need to carry someone else’s fear. Let them work through it. Your job is to keep going.

Call to Action: Join the Conversation
I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one way you’ve protected your light from someone else’s fear?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who’s struggling to rise because others are trying to hold them back, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is to be reminded we’re allowed to shine.

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Too many of us are not living our dreams because we’re living our fears.

New blog goes up Tuesday,  until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Fear Inflicted

Fear Of Success

I’ve talked a lot about fear, and how fear ruled my life before stepping on this path. Fear can take many forms, and it can be quite cunning in disguising itself as others things, it can also pop up and get in the way of our success. Fear of success as another type of fear I also experienced.

I always had dreams, hopes, and goals I worked toward, and, even in my disease I accomplished a lot, but I did suffer from fear in regards to those successes. That fear came up for a number of reasons. I feared and believed I didn’t really deserve success, that I wasn’t good enough and that if I succeeded it would be short-lived because I would be found out as a fraud. I feared that if I found success that others would not like me and I would lose friends or feel ostracized. I feared that if I found success that others might feel that I was showing off, and if I celebrated that success, bragging about what I had accomplished. And I feared that if I found success that I still wouldn’t be happy. That’s a lot of fear trying to derail the things I wanted and worked for in my life. Looking at that all in print, it’s amazing I found any success at all, and when I did I would mostly downplay it as a fluke, or luck, which, of course wasn’t the case, I was working hard for those successes, but because of all the fear I was carrying around I was also afraid to give myself credit.

Fear of success can form from many sources. Some of us may have been told we can’t accomplish those things we want, we may have failed and were embarrassed by not accomplishing our goal, or we may not want to be more successful than those around us. We let outside forces rob us of success, and we let our own internal voice rob us of success. We are all meant to succeed. We are here to grow, learn, and find success in whatever given area we excel at, or find interest in. We are all worthy of success, not only for ourselves, but for everyone else we may touch by our success, or what that success may offer us and those around us. In a sense, it is our duty to succeed, because it’s not just about us, it’s about how we contribute to society as a whole, and our success just might inspire someone else to go out and find theirs. And what if we fail? So what if we fail. All of the most successful people, in any given field, have failed, and many, found their greatest success in those failures, so you have to trust the process and not doubt who you and what you have to offer. What you choose to focus on, what you are looking to succeed in is not an accident, you are destined to aspire to it, so to sabotage your own success because of your fear means you’re are not reaching your destiny, or your full potential, you are telling the universe, God, whatever, or whomever, you believe in, that they are wrong by not succeeding and by denying your talents.

Fear of success can be an invisible enemy, because while we are building something with one hand we may also be tearing it down with the other hand and not even realizing we’re doing it. It’s about believing that we can and will succeed, that we need to do our part for humanity, to contribute what we can give back by our success. Our success isn’t just about us, it fits into the bigger picture, and so when you may think that you don’t deserve success, you not only take that away from yourself, but everyone who may have benefited by accomplishment. Get to work SLAYER, you are destined for success. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you feel that you are worthy of success? If not, why not? If you do, why do you feel you are? Write down an example of a time you got in the way of your own success. Write down a time when you did succeed. How did that success make you feel? How, also, did your success affect others? What good came from that success? What good came to others from your success? It’s up to you to believe you deserve to succeed, and to not get in your own way of that success. You are not your past, you are working and moving forward to succeed and to be exactly were you are meant to be, successfully.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! As dark as things might be, you never know how bright the light is that is waiting for you if you just hold on.

New blog goes up Sunday,  until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Thankful (1)