faith

All The Wrong Reasons

I believe we are guided to where we are meant to be. I believe we can connect to something greater than ourselves through a spiritual practice or faith for continued direction in our lives. But regardless of what we may or not believe, when we look at our lives we can typically find a reason why we may have been lead down certain paths, both good and bad.

I was speaking to someone yesterday about this topic, and she smiled and said that the two most important things in her life, those things that contribute to her overall wellness she entered into for the wrong reasons but found something very valuable there. It got me thinking of situations in my life when I may have had different intentions, or even selfish or wrong intentions, but those actions lead me to something beautiful. I do believe that there is a force that guides me, protects me, and wants the best for me, I’ve seen many examples of this in my life, the one most important, is the night I should have lost my life, I wrote about that experience in my blog “A Power Greater Than Myself,” which you can find here A Power Greater Than Myself, and as a result of having been shown that that guidance is there I know now not to question it, or the directions I may find myself heading to, as long as it feels right to my mind, body and spirit. The universe, God, spirit, whatever you believe or may call it, may guide you to something using whatever will be most attractive to you in the moment, to get you to where you need to be, almost like dangling a carrot, and likely, you have been given the clues or shown the way many times before and had chosen not to take the path you are meant to be on, so, a different direction is taken to get you where you should be. We all have freedom of choice, but we don’t always make the best decisions for ourselves, I know this all too well from my past, so sometimes a little bait and switch happens to bring us to that place we ultimately will find beneficial to us.

It doesn’t matter what gets us to where we are meant to be, what matters is that we remain teachable and open to new experiences, new places and new ways of thinking. We don’t know everything, there’s no way we could, the world and what is out there is far beyond our comprehension, we only know what is in front of us and what we have experienced, so when something new is presented to us, we should take that opportunity and explore what’s there, we can always say it’s not for us, but what if if is, and what if it’s exactly what we’ve been looking for, but it just doesn’t look the way we thought it would.

It doesn’t matter what reasons get us to where we are meant to be, what matters is that we are open to what what we may find there. Life does have a way of showing us one thing just so we’ll discover something else. Be open to where your path may lead you and to what you may find there. You may be directed to someone or something that will completely change the direction of your life through a situation that may have been your worst, there is always a reason for everything. Stay true to who you are, trust, and look for the signs, they are pointing you in the right direction. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you believe in something greater than yourself guiding you to where you are mean to be? If not, why not? Can you see examples in your life where you may have changed direction or had been shown a new way of life? Write down that example. Can you think of times when you may have not taken the direction and found yourself repeating the past where you had not been happy? What can you do to change your view, to be open to new things and possibly new roads? The answers, and solutions, you are looking for may just be there in front of you, look for the signs, take a chance on new opportunities and new roads, and be open to things, when you do, the possibilities are endless.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Let your intention be known, do the footwork, and trust where you are being lead.

New blog goes up Tuesday, until then… SLAY on!

State Of Slay Fall Into Place

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! You become what you believe.

SLAY on!

State Of Slay Manifest

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! If you’re living in harmony with yourself, you’re living in harmony with the universe.

New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!

state of slay universe

How Do I Know I’m In The Flow?

Someone recently asked me how I know when I’m in the will of the universe or my own will. For me, I can typically tell because when I’m not trying to force my will things go smoothly, it’s like being in the express lane on the freeway.

Looking back, before stepping on this path, I only wanted things my way. Nothing went smoothly because I was trying to force things into happening the way I wanted them and when I wanted them. There was no waiting or investigating to find the right way, or the right time, I wanted what I wanted and I wanted it now! As a result I wasted a lot of time and energy on things I had no business being a part of, and would often get involved with people I shouldn’t have, or get involved with them for the wrong reasons. Nothing just flowed into the right direction because I was trying to override that direction with the direction I was trying to make happen, which led me into dishonesty and manipulation. It was all a slippery slope with me, and when I’m in a mode of trying to force my will I’ll go to almost any length to make that happen, ignoring the signs around me that I’m heading in the wrong direction.

The Universe, God, Higher Power, whatever makes sense for you, does send us guidance and signs if we ask for them, and, we are looking for them. Sometimes those signs do come like a slap in the face when we’ve been ignoring them, and there may be something that comes that is even bigger than a sign and just stops you dead in your tracks, but when we are open to working with a force that is bigger than ourselves, and look for direction, I have found it is there, and if it’s not in that moment I know that I am not supposed to do anything at that moment, to keep doing the work, keep investigating, keep asking for direction, but stay right where I am until I feel confident about the next move. It is during those times, when I am in alignment with where I am supposed to be that I feel at peace, that things do fall into place, many times, quite miraculously, and I feel grounded and centered on my path. Now that may sound like some mumbo jumbo if you don’t have a belief or understanding in something greater than yourself, but I am a firm believer in a higher power and I know, from plenty of experiences in my life, that there is something out there that watches over me, and I also know that when I connect with it, it has my back, in fact it’s even had my back when I haven’t connected with it, but it works better when I do, and I certainly feel better.

There are signs and direction everywhere if we choose to see them and take the direction. We can try to run the show and steer the ship ourselves, but we’re likely going to hit solid ground at some point steering it alone, now that’s not to say that hitting bottom isn’t a part of your journey, and, could possibly be a blessing to get you where you need to be, but why cause more chaos than you really need to, life is meant to be enjoyed, we’re not meant to suffer at your own hand. Find your flow, be open to new ideas or directions, and look for the signs, they’re there and they’re there to show us the way. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you believe that there is something greater than yourself that guides you and looks after you? If not, why not? If you do, what is your understanding or belief in what that is? How has it guided you in the past? When have you seen the guidance and chosen not to take it? What was the result? What signs have you seen in your life that there seems to be some guidance from that source? How do you connect with it? How can you connect with it more? It comes down to having faith SLAYER, faith in something you cannot see but can feel, if you consciously work on forming a relationship with it, and allow yourself to loosen the reigns and let something else show you the way, that connection, or bond, will get stronger, and that direction clearer. There is a lot out there we don’t know, so why not let yourself believe and trust that you may have more on your side than you thought?

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! If you wait until you’re ready, you’ll be waiting for the rest of your life.

SLAY on!

State Of Slay Just Say Yes

Contempt Prior To Investigation

I used to think I knew better. I thought I knew better than all of you, and I thought I knew if I was going to like something, even if I had never done it before. And because I lived in a negative space, I often said no to things without ever trying them. Before someone could even finish asking me to join in or participate in something I had already made up my mind I didn’t want to do it. Some of that came from fear, fear of never having done it and now knowing what the result will be, or, maybe looking stupid because I didn’t know what I was doing. My first reaction to any invite or suggestion was no. As a result, I missed out on a lot of things, a lot of opportunities, because I had already condemned something before it happened.

When I stepped on this path, I was encouraged to say yes. Yes was a word that made my anxiety shoot up immediately. What if I didn’t like what I agreed to do? What if I didn’t like the people? What if they didn’t like me? What if? What if? But I knew if multiple people kept encouraging me to say yes, I had to try, I had to say yes to saying yes, no matter how nervous that made me. I had to watch myself, in the beginning, I had to watch that I didn’t jump in each time with a quick no, I would breathe, make myself listen and then tell myself, regardless of what it was, I had to say yes, just to try. If I didn’t like it I didn’t have to do it again. I made a commitment to myself, that in that first year I had to say yes, so the year of yes began.

The first few times it was tough, saying yes, but as I kept doing it it got easier. And, I was discovering some new things about myself. When you say no all the time you don’t give yourself an opportunity to grow, to learn, to test yourself. As we move through life, our wants and needs change, as we do, but when we’re not testing the waters to see what works best for us today, we stay stuck and keep doing the same things, or nothing, and not growing to our potential. Saying yes does take courage, and faith, that you’re being asked to say yes for a reason. Nothing happens randomly, typically things come to us when we need them, or should take part in them, so we can take away what we should to move forward, or possibly, change the direction we’re going in completely. So when we keep saying no, we’re not only stuck, we’re not were we’re supposed to be.

Now after almost 13 years of saying yes, I can say that the yes’s have been very good to me. Yes has gotten me to a pretty incredible place today, and one I wouldn’t have had to courage to say yes to if I hadn’t had years of practice of saying yes, because this yes, is life-changing, and has taken a big leap of faith that what was given to me was exactly where I am meant to be, and I know that with every fiber of my soul. When we say yes, the universe says yes back. We open the road of possibilities and allow the flow of new ideas and new challenges that are meant to prepare us for the next yes, and possibly, prepare us for the biggest yes yet. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Is your immediate reaction when being asked to do something a no? Why? What happened the last time you said yes? Why don’t you say yes more often? What do you think will happen? When you think about the times you may have said yes, how do you feel about those choices? How do you feel when you see other people saying yes and getting remarkable results while you’re still saying no? You can be one of those yes people SLAYER. Challenge yourself this week to say yes, at least twice. Ignore the negative voices that tell you to say no and just say yes, say it without even thinking about, just blurt out yes! You may just discover some new things about yourself, and may even meet some new people who are also saying yes. Surround yourself with people who say yes, try new things, challenge yourself to move forward, to uncharted waters, and say yes to exploring who you are and where you are meant to be. One yes may just change your whole life.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! It’s not what happens to you that determines your future, it’s what you do about it.

New blog goes up on Sunday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Become

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! No matter how low you may feel, someone else out there feels lower, and your light, even though it may feel dim, may be as bright as the sun to someone in need. Shine bright.

New bog goes up Sunday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Storm (1)

Let Your Heart Shine

We lost a bright star yesterday. As I was in the air, traveling, my Uncle passed away. I’ve spoken about him before, on SLAY TALK LIVE, he had been battling cancer for the past 9 years, and yesterday he found his rest from that battle. What I will carry with me moving forward, and forever in my heart, is how he changed when he was first diagnosed. I imagine a cancer diagnoses must feel like a death sentence, that immediate shock and the reality setting in, although there are many survivors, some of whom I count as friends, but it would be easy to feel defeated, or to retreat from life when you feel like perhaps you don’t have much of it left to live. My Uncle Mel, was not one of those people.

He didn’t have an easy life, and he wasn’t always the man I came to know during his fight, that is the miraculous thing about Uncle Mel, he allowed something that could easily perceived as negative and let it turn him into someone so full of light, so full of love, and he let it fill him with such a desire and drive to make other people’s days brighter, that I believe, it kept him going, for years, as he continued to fight various forms of cancer. I always called him a superhero, and he would laugh, he would say, “I’m just doing what the good Lord shows me to do.” He had a strong faith, and it was that faith that he relied on as his journey was coming to an end. He found a peace with it, and made the most of his time here with us all.

He said this to me a number of times, but the last time we spoke he said that I had permission to tell his story, to share who we was, because it might help someone else. So, today, as I write this with tears in my eyes, I know it’s important to do just that, for me, for anyone who may need it, and for him.

I look at his journey and it reminds me that even in the face of adversity we can still share our light and our heart. We always have something to offer to someone who may be sicker, or feeling even lower than we do, or who just might need a friend. No matter where we are, we always have value, and have the ability to share our best selves. My Uncle never became his best self, I believe, until he started to share it, until he started to give away the light he had to give and was able to light the way for many others as they walked in their own struggle, or darkness. I believe that fire, that light, is what kept him going the past 9 years, and it lit the way for many others.

I talk a lot here at STATE OF SLAY of holding a torch for one another, so when we may find ourselves in the dark, there is always a light to find your way home. I believe that because Uncle Mel held his torch for so many, that yesterday, he saw that light and made his way home.

We have a choice, each day, to live our lives in the darkness, or to shine bright, and it may feel safer in the dark, especially if that is all we’ve known, or we feel we don’t deserve the light, but we are meant to be in the light, not only for ourselves, but so we can share it with others, and when we do not only do we bring light to those around us, but our light gets brighter. I know there will be a bright star shining in the night sky tonight, and that star is my Uncle, his star will continue to shine from above, lighting the way for us here, and as a reminder when we look up, that there is something beautiful up there, watching over us in the darkness of the night. Shine on my SLAYERS!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you allow yourself to shine or do you dim that shine? If you do dim your shine, why do you do that? How does it help you? How does it hurt you? How can you share that light with someone in your life who may need it? Write down a time when you may have felt you had nothing to offer, but were able to make someone’s day brighter. How did that make you feel? Did you feel brighter? You did, didn’t you SLAYER? Always let your light shine, even if it’s just a small flicker of a flame, when you share that flame with someone else, that flame starts a fire, and warms all who are within it’s reach. SLAY on!

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you