Love

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! We are better together.

SLAY on!

State Of Slay Dumpster Fire

 

SLAY TALK LIVE Video

Hey SLAYERS! Sorry for those of you who were confused as to where to find us, we had to move to Facebook LIVE, and, for those who didn’t join us, here’s what you missed!

SLAY on!

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Slay Say

Good morning SLAYERS! I am more than my scars.

New blog goes up Sunday, until then… SLAY on!

State Of Slay Gold Self Love Super Power

When We Love Ourselves Love Finds Us

This seemed like a good topic for Valentine’s Day, and one that may stir up some feelings about self-love. As someone who spent most of her life hating herself I know the power we have over what we attract into our lives. That’s not to say if we don’t love ourselves that we won’t, can’t, or don’t have love in our lives, because I know we can, I did, even when that self-love wasn’t there, but when we do find or have that love for ourselves it invites more love in, and, we tend to look for the love we already have and want to share our love with others.

Love is contagious, who doesn’t want to feel, receive and give love? It can heal almost anything, and what I may not be able to heal alone, it can certainly help with the process. Finding love for myself came with some work on my part, but I knew I had to find it to get better and to live the life I had dreamed of. To get to the place I am now I had to first find forgiveness in myself, for all the unloving things I did to myself and to those around me. I had to let go of the guilt and shame I carried around that held me back and blocked me from finding self-love. I had to take responsibility for my actions but I also had to accept that I was doing the best I could with the tools I had, and, with untreated mental illness, my best thinking often set me on a course of self-sabotage and self-destruction. I would never criticize someone with cancer, diabetes or Alzheimer’s so why would I criticize myself for the disease I had that had clouded my judgment and stole from me for most of my life. Finding that acceptance and using it as a tool to grow from where I was, to do better and to start living in a positive way was the place I started on my journey to self-love. I made a point, each day, to find gratitude in who I was, where I was and where I wanted to go, and some days that proved more challenging than others, but even just thinking of one thing was enough to change my outlook. I gave back where I could to others struggling like I was, which got me out of my own head and relieved me of the negative thinking that had plagued me my whole life. I made a lot of changes, took direction from others and professionals and I began to feel better. Slowly, by practicing loving acts towards myself and others I was able to say, out loud, that I loved myself, and when I did my life changed, and I began to look for love in each day. I also began to share the love I had with others, even by paying someone a compliment are congratulating them on a job well done. Walking this path with love in my heart ultimately brought me a love I didn’t know I could have and a man who I now share a love with that continues to grow each day.

Finding love for ourselves may seem like an impossible journey, but nothing is impossible if we try and make changes in our lives that support our efforts to find that love. It’s a journey that takes humility and a desire to search for those things that we feel make us lovable and what allows us to share our love with those around us. We all are worthy of love, even if we don’t feel we are, but when we open our heart to the idea of it, the magic of love may just open your heart enough to show you just how lovable you really are. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you believe you are lovable? If not, why not? Have you always felt that way? If you haven’t, what changed? Are there moments in your life that have been able to find self-love? What were they? Why don’t they stay or why did they go away? What can you do today to show yourself love? How can you share that love with someone else? Today, since this is a day to celebrate love, look for all of the love you have in your life and all of the ways you can show yourself love in return, just being willing to look for it opens the door enough to come in.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

IMALIVE: There’s Always Me Campaign

Hello SLAYER! Excited to contribute again this year to the IMALIVE Valentine’s Day campaign #TheresAlwaysMe.

This Valentine’s week, we ask you to place a little note or card where it can be found. It is a small gesture that could go a long way.

It could even save a life.

What to do:

  • From February 7th – 14th get creative!
  • Make notes or cards to leave for others to find.
  • Download the poster, bookmarks or cards (by us and our supporters), print and leave for others to find.
  • Add our hashtag #ThereIsAlwaysMe
  • Take pictures and tag us, we will share them!

Join us and spread the word that #ThereIsAlwaysMe

To download my cards or others, go to IMALIVE V-Day Campaign

For more information about IMALIVE or to donate to go: IMALIVE: An Online Crisis Network

Carrie Genzel IMALIVE V-Day 2020

Carrie Genzel IMALIVE V-Day Campaign

Carrie Genzel

 

You’re Worth It

Fourteen years ago today I surrendered. After years of suffering, I finally admitted defeat. And although that may sound like I failed in some way, I really won that day.  I finally found the humility and courage to ask for help, and I had just enough hope to stand up and fight for myself. That hope was really dim, but it was there, and I held onto that little light inside of myself as I set foot on a new path, my hands may have been shaking, but my heart gave me just enough strength to keep stepping forward, even if those steps, to start, where small.

I learned, early on, that my secrets, those things I fought to hide, those things I thought would show you I was weak, unlovable and ugly, those things were the things that there going to connect me to those who would understand me, lift me up, and love me before I could love myself. What I thought was the ugliest part of me became my ally and admitting my faults was the key to finding self-forgiveness and strength. I would also learn that admitting my faults would not push those away who were true friends and family who wanted the best for me, but it would bring us closer together, it would bond us, open the door to understanding and create a support system for me that I still hold close today. It would also surround me with people like myself who were working to do the best they could with what they had, and had also made the choice to fight for their life. And, that’s truly what I was doing every day, and every day since then, chosen to fight for my life. That fight has become less strenuous over the years but still can be on certain days, but I know today that I never fight it alone, I have a whole army of warriors around me, and I need to, I know, from when I was living in the dark, that I can’t fight alone, and am not meant to, we have far more strength together, and when we are weak, tired or feel we can’t go on, we pick up those who are struggling until they are able to get up and continue their fight alongside us.

My gratitude for the last 14 years is immeasurable, as is my love for those who have walked this journey with me. Today, I walk in the light, because I choose to, and I let that light shine for others to see who may need that spark of hope like I did years ago. When we shine our light and fight to be our best selves, we give others permission to do so also, or perhaps offer a spark that sets them off on their own journey of recovery. That, I believe is why I am still here, to share a message of hope, of compassion and to connect with all of you from a place of vulnerability, transparency and healing, we all want the same thing, to be loved, to feel love, to feel we matter and are appreciated and heard, and I want to you to know, you are, I love you, and even if you don’t love yourself today, I still love you, perhaps even more, as I know that sometimes what we need to get started is someone else seeing us for who we are and loving us anyway.  I hope one day you may find that you have always been worthy of love, especially those parts you think are unlovable. You are worth it, whatever it takes, find what works for you and fight, I am right there with you SLAYER.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you feel you’re worth fighting for? If not, why not? Is this something you think alone, or have you been told this? By whom? Why do you think they have said that? Why do you think it’s true? What if you didn’t believe them and fought for yourself anyway? What do you think would happen? What would you like to happen? It can. You hold the power to change, to seek help, to find those like yourself to support you, to share your journey with you. You have much more power than you think, but you have to believe you do, or at least have enough to get you started. That’s all it took for me, just enough strength to pick up the phone and share my truth, and that phone call started me on this path I walk today, and that path has given me a life beyond what I ever could have imagined. SLAY on!

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYERS! Fill your heart with your own love and positivity, then, share it with someone else.

New blog goes up Sunday, until then… SLAY on!

State Of Slay Green Support You

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Thank those who walk with you on your journey.

New blog goes up Tuesday, until then… SLAY on!

State Of Slay Be Kind

The Good Version Of Yourself

For most of my life I was not living as the good version of myself. She was down there, somewhere, but I had thrown years and years worth of garbage on top of her so that all I could see was the garbage, and, I believed that all you could see was the garbage as well. Deep down I believed that the good version of myself was still in there, but I didn’t know if I could dig down deep enough to find that good version, and that garbage I kept piling on was slowly eating away at the person I had become. Even so, sometimes she would come out, but she couldn’t stand the weight of all of that garbage and would retreat back down in the darkness she had become accustomed to living.

When I stepped on this path, I made a commitment to dig down and get that good version of me out. This was a rescue mission, to save the good version of me, and to save my life. I wasn’t sure what I was going to find when I started digging, or how far I was going to have to dig to get her out, but I started to do the work to find her, and, to hopefully save her. I surrounded myself with those, like myself, who had already done the work, and those who, like me, where just getting started or on their own path of rescue. Each one of them saw themselves in me, as I did them, and they were able to see the good version of me, even though I wasn’t able to see her on my own most of the time, but, they could see her, and I started to see her through their eyes and with their support, and through them, I was able to start reconnecting with her. I was now more determined than ever, doing what was suggested, to sift through the rubble to get her out. Along the way, after years and years of stuffing her down, I wasn’t sure what I was really going to find when I found her. I had been stuffing her down and stuffing things on top of the good version of me for so long that I had lost who she really was, who I really was, I had stopped caring for that good version of me and had lost touch with who she really was. When I found her I had to get to know her again, or, in all honesty, likely, get to know her for the first time. I did find her, and make a commitment to her every day to do what’s right for her, and to never stuff her down or pile garbage on top of her ever again. Her light and spirit shines through me, she is the good version of me, and I am that good version, and now the good version of me found the good version of someone else, and together they are very happy, and are even better together.

We all have a good version of ourselves, and it’s up to us to let that good version out, to care and nurture that good version and to let that good version shine. If we’re not careful we can lose that good version, or push that good version aside, when we do our heart knows and our light dims, so it’s up to us to light that flame again, or perhaps, see our light through someone else’s eyes. There is good in you, the good in me sees it, and encourages the good version of you to come out and be everything it is meant to be. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you believe you are the good version of you? If not why not? If you don’t, where is the good version of you? Do you believe that good version is inside you, waiting to get out? What stops it? Are you stopping it? Why? Has the good version of you gotten buried under the stuff you pile on top of it? How can you get that good version of yourself out? It’s in there SLAYER, focus on the good and see the good in you through the people in your life who only see that good, they will help you find it again, or, for the first time. There is good in you, and that good is you.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Those Who Underestimate Us

Throughout my life I have often found that people have underestimated me. For various reasons people have tried to limit what they think I am capable of or should even attempt. My spirit, and drive, has always been strong, and the fear of regretting never trying as always outweighed the fear of trying and possibly failing, and now, having lived on this path for many years, I know there is no failure, only an opportunity to learn. Most of the times I have been underestimated I have used that to fuel my desire to attempt or accomplish what I’ve set out to do, but there have been times that the disbelief that I can complete or attain my goals has been like a knife in my chest. Even, so, I never let it stop me from moving forward.

Support by those we love, colleagues or others in general really can propel us to success. We ourselves, at times have self-doubt, but with the support of those around us we can overcome those negative thoughts and head toward the finish line. But so can those who don’t believe we can get there. It’s easy to take someone else’s opinion of what they think we are capable of and let it bring us down, it can be like a self-fulfilling prophecy were we let it derail us into falling short just as predicted. But for me, being a reformed stubborn close-minded girl in the past, I can pull up that old stubbornness and use it for good. I now, when someone doesn’t believe in me, use that stubbornness to propel me forward and continue on my journey to complete my goal. It’s nice when I have support behind as I go, but not necessary if it’s someone I strongly believe in or have challenged myself to finish. There’s also the twinge of satisfaction when you are able to accomplish what you set out to and are able to show those doubters that you yes you can do exactly what they thought was impossible, I believe that is a moment of self-pride for a job well done.

We should never let anyone else dictate what we can or cannot do. Our limits are only set by ourselves, and, we shouldn’t set any. We are capable of almost anything we set our minds to, and even if something may not be attainable right now, there’s a reason we’re drawn to it, it may be leading us down a path that is meant for us. Never doubt yourself or your goals or dreams, nothing happens by accident, we are meant to challenge ourselves, to reach higher than before and to go after those things we want for ourselves or have dreamed about, we are the only ones who can stop us. Those things may not always look exactly how we thought they would, but they are many times better, because we only have the limited information of our experiences so far, we don’t have the broad spectrum of what is actually out there for us to discover and realize. So, go after your goals with everything you’ve got, and if someone underestimates you, don’t let them slow you down, use that doubt to fire you up and keep you on the path of your goal.

Let someone’s negative opinion of you of you lead to positive results, and perhaps the next time you share your goals with them, they’ll see your potential and cheer you on to victory! SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you allow for negative comments derail you from your goals and ambitions? Why do you do that? How can you change that? Why is it so important to you to have everyone believe in what you want or are doing? Can you use that energy to prove them wrong or attain your goals anyway? Can you use that energy to fuel the fire inside of you to produce a positive outcome? It is always preferable to have the support of those around us, but if we don’t have all of the support we would like, it is still possible to realize our dreams or challenge ourselves to accomplish something new. Use whatever energy comes your way, positive, or negative, to prove to yourself that you can do it, and let those naysayers come around on their own, it’s not your job to convince them, it’s your job to keep reaching for your personal best.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you