Good morning SLAYER! There is no such thing as coincidence, the universe is always speaking to us.
New blog goes up Sunday…until then, SLAY on!
Author: Carrie Genzel
The Signs Are There
When I go about my day I always look for the signs, those things that are pointing me in the right direction, showing me the way, the people I am meant to have in my life, and new things that will open my eyes to a new direction or something I might enjoy. Those signs have always been there, but when I was living my life in the darkness I couldn’t see them. Or, didn’t want to see them. Thinking back, there were many signs I chose to ignore because it meant I had to change, or do some work, or say goodbye to something that wasn’t really good for me but I enjoyed hanging on to, either to continue to punish myself, or to keep myself on the same dark path I was on. My line of sight was so dark and so narrow I didn’t see much of anything except what I chose to see. But when I stepped into the light I started to see a new world around me, one full of signs and signals to where I was supposed to go, where I wanted to go, or where I was open to going, they were there, not always at the exactly moment when I wanted them, or asked for them, although sometimes they were, but they popped up when I needed them, when I was ready for them, when I chose to see them. When we find ourselves feeling directionless, or at loss of where to go next, as many of you know, I’m a huge advocate of asking for what you want, so say it out loud, tell people about it, the act of getting it out there can many times bring surprising results, and we may realize that what we want isn’t that far out of reach. But sometimes it takes a little more than just saying it out loud, it takes us being open to it, and living our lives in away that allows us to see the signs. So, how do we do this?
Develop A Desire To Receive The universe is always sending us messages, trying to help us to where we want and/or should go. But we have to be open to seeing and hearing what’s coming our way, not just looking for the signs we want to see and hear. What may come to us may not be what we’re looking for, but it’s what we need, so being open to not only receiving those signs, but being open to the idea that it may bring us to unexpected places. Let yourself be a vessel to take in what is being sent to you, without filtering out what you think you don’t want.
Be Alert Pay attention to the people, places and things around you, even the song that comes on the radio. Signs can come to us in many different ways, and at any time, but if our faces are buried in our phones, or we’re set in our mind that a sign can only look and feel a certain way, we’re going to miss them. Take some time to look around each day, to engage with life, and those around you, to take a moment or two to be quiet with yourself, the answers do come when we look, and we allow ourselves to see.
Look For Patterns If you’re unsure about what’s coming your way, or can’t make sense of it, keep a log, write it down, sometimes it’s easier to piece things together when you can see it on the page rather than just thoughts bouncing around in your head, look for patterns, similarities, things that connect the signs you are getting. Sometimes it’s that we’re not getting the point, so we’ll keep getting the same signs, or we’re ignoring them, if we’re meant to be somewhere we are not, the universe will keep sending the same signs until we get off our butts and go there, or do what we’re supposed to do, so, if you keep getting the same things, take a look at that, and why you haven’t gone there or done it yet.
Surrender Whatever comes your way you have to surrender to it and learn to work as one with the universe and stop trying to manipulate what the signs are that come your way to bend them into what you’re looking for. Surrender and be open to where you may be guided to go next.
Keep It Simple It’s easy to over complicate things and put words in the universe’s mouth where we may not have complete answers, but the universe works in simple ways, if you don’t have enough information yet, stay open, and keeping surrendering to the process, the universe will give you the information when the time is right, or in a way you’ll understand, so stop trying to help things along by trying to finish the job yourself. Keep things simple, listen, and wait.
The biggest ally you have is the universe. The universe is on your side and is sending you love, but you have to be open to receive it, and surrender to the process of it’s guidance of where you’re supposed to be. There are no short cuts in life, you either learn how to dance to it’s rhythm, or trip over your two left feet.
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you notice signs in your life guiding you to where you’re supposed to be? Name some. If not, why do you think you’re not seeing them? What gets in your way? How do you think you can overcome them? Do you think you have an open mind to the signs you are given, or do you only look for the signs you want to see? Are you able to surrender to the signs you find? If not, why? When you haven’t surrendered and have moved forward on your own anyways, what was the result of that? Do you see, looking back, that you may have been directed a different way? Do you believe the universe cares for you and wants the best for you? If not, why? Are these ideas based on fact, or based in your own self-loathing or self-love issues? What if you tried SLAYER, to think of the universe as your ally, to try to work together with it, to look and listen to what it’s telling you, and to take action where it’s showing you to. What if you stopped running your life on self-will and started to let go to the next indicated right action? I challenge you to SLAYER. You may be surprised what you’ll find.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you
Slay Say
Good morning SLAYER! Never be afraid to speak your mind, we all have one for a reason. Your thoughts are valid and deserve to be heard.
New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!
Honestly Honest
We’ve all heard the saying “honesty is the best policy,” and it is, so why are so many of us afraid of being honest? We may be afraid of being judged, afraid of upsetting the other person, afraid of being seen as different, or just afraid to speak our minds. But when we don’t speak up we typically don’t forget what we didn’t say, it stays with us, playing again and again in our heads like a song on repeat and we beat ourselves up for not speaking our truth. Now, speaking our truth can be tricky, sometimes our truth, or honest opinion, may not be the popular opinion, or what everyone wants to hear, but if we don’t speak up many times it turns into a resentment, either towards the person or people we didn’t speak up to, or ourselves for keeping our mouth shut when we should have spoken up. Being afraid is never a reason not to do anything. So how do we learn to walk through that fear and share our true thoughts with those around us?
1) Stay Calm And Take A Moment. Again, life is not a game show there are no points for speaking up first and having the fastest response. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, take a moment, breathe, even step away for a second to collect your thoughts. It’s OK to say you need a moment, you don’t have to come up with something right away. Sometimes taking a step back is just what you need gather your thoughts in a concise and clear way so you can share them in a way that will be easily understood. If it’s something you’re very emotional about, definitely give yourself some time, letting your emotions take over will not help you convey what you’re wanting to say in a way that will open the door to a healthy and calm discussion.
2) Be Confident. Everyone is entitled to an opinion, and yours is just as important as anyone else’s, so don’t be afraid to speak your mind. Speaking up also opens the door to a conversation or discussion, something that is always useful and understanding and getting to know those around you, and, also yourself. If you feel strongly about something, speak up, share it, and also be open to listen to other people’s points of view. Again, as always, we all have our own perspectives and even though you’re feeling very strongly about yours, there are always different sides to each story or situation, so don’t be afraid to share yours, but allow others to share theirs as well.
3) Overcome Your Fear. You may be fearful of being made fun of, or being listed as difficult, or different, but don’t put so much weight into what other people think, what’s important is what you think and that you’re expressing that. Now, we as SLAYERS don’t set out to say things we know will purposely hurt or anger someone else, we share our thoughts in a thoughtful and mindful way, but we don’t amend our thoughts to appease someone else. People typically will appreciate your honesty with them, even if it differs from their own opinion, they’ll usually respect that you shared your thoughts with them. If they don’t, then that tells you something about who they are and your relationship with them, that’s a red flag and not a good sign of a healthy relationship.
4) Use Your Problem Solving Skills. If there is a differing of opinion, this is an opportunity to work on your problem solving skills. To see if you can find a middle ground or resolution to our differing of opinions. Keeping an open mind and letting others talk are two to elements to this, and you may find that after hearing what they have to say, you may alter your own opinion, or maybe not, but just going into a discussion with the mindset that you are open to new ideas, while sharing your own, can bring an amicable sense of energy to a discussion which opens the door to having a good outcome.
Always be confident in who you are and what you have to offer. Your opinion is unique to you, and your thoughts are valid. If someone has wronged you, has asked for your opinion, or you’re working together on project, speak your mind, collaborate, and be open to other perspectives, you just maybe surprised how easy speaking up can be, and how when you do you gain more confidence, self-esteem, and a stronger sense of self.
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you speak your mind when you have an opinion? If not, why not? Do you have fear around being honest with people? Why do you think you do? Are the reasons you have fear around speaking your mind valid fears based in facts? Or are they old narratives from your past that are no longer your truth today? If they are your truth today, what does this tell you about the people you have chosen to surround yourself with? Are there better choices you can be making with the people you have in your life? I challenge you SLAYER to speak your mind this week, to share your opinion, or speak up if you feel you have something to say, the more you do it, the easier it becomes, and, if you take a misstep, that’s a part of the process, that is how we learn, but if we are open an honest we are not hiding our true selves and walking around with unsaid ideas and opinions that are taking up valuable space in our minds, let them out and show your real you. SLAY on.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you
Slay Say
Happy New Year SLAYER! Today is the first page of a 365 page book, you get to choose your own adventure, write a good one.
New blog goes up Tuesday, until then…SLAY on!
New Year, New You
Today is New Year’s Eve. The end of one year and the beginning of another. I’ve never been one for New Year’s Resolutions, I’ve always made commitments to myself as I feel I’m ready for them, or ready for the challenge of them, so the idea of having to come up with them on a specific day has never really appealed to me. What I do like is the idea of a clean slate. A fresh page. A new year gives us a marker and chance to hit the restart button and start again. Now, we’re still us walking into the new year, but maybe we’re us with a different perspective, with new goals, or a drive to find what we’re looking for. It’s a time to take a deep breath and let go of the past to make room for something new. The problem I have with resolutions is that we seem to set ourselves up to fail. We set them thinking we should have them, people ask us what they are, there’s that anticipation that we have to have answers when asked, and so we set forth and make a list that we may not be fully ready to commit to, or truly have any intention of taking action on. So, if we do feel pressured to make a list, and there is no real pressure to, or we’re just wanting to set some goals for ourselves as we head into a new year, how do we make better choices when it comes to finding out what we really do intend to change, or want to change?
First, it’s asking ourselves why we’re wanting things to change, and what we’re wanting to change? What is our motivation behind seeking out this change? Why is it important to us? How will it help us or benefit us? And these answers should have answers that pertain to us, not how we’ll look to others, or if they’ll help someone else, these should be our goals or changes that will help us to become the people we want to be, who we aspire to be, because deep down we know we are those people. It’s about uncovering our true selves and getting rid of old habits we used to use to get by, or survive, or possibly hide who we truly were. Our goals or resolutions, if we want to stick with that label, should not be born out of judgment of ourselves, or comparison of those around us. They should come from a truth inside of us that we know we should change because what we are wanting to let go of is no longer serving us, or possibly never did. These goals should be internal goals, done for internal reasons, not because they’ll look good on the outside, when we do what we think we should do, or we do something to please someone else, but we don’t believe it in our heart, we are setting ourselves up to fail. We should only do what we know is right for us and do it for us, only then do we have a chance to overcome that particular hurdle and succeed.
We also have to give ourselves time. Change doesn’t happen overnight. We can make some changes, but we have give ourselves time to let those changes settle in, and also, give ourselves some leeway to know we’re going to revert back to our old ways from time to time, change takes time, and it takes practice, so even if you fall back, don’t just throw in the towel, understand that’s part of the process, learn from it, and keep going. The more you do something, the more it becomes your new normal. Failure is a part of the process. Always remember why you’re making the change and how it affects you personally. Remember why you’re doing what you’re doing.
Having the awareness that you want to change and what you want to change is a catalyst for change. Awareness is half the battle, the rest is doing it. So really look at your life, who you are, what you do, how you interact with the world around you and be honest with yourself, are you living as your true self? What areas can you improve on? What areas can you really shine? It can be hard to take an honest look at ourselves, but change doesn’t happen if we keep telling ourselves the same story and living in a place that doesn’t allow us to be our best selves. Take a cold hard look at you, the stuff that makes you flinch, or makes you uncomfortable, that’s the perfect place to stop and take a look and ask yourself why it does. Anything can be changed for the better, we all have the ability to make changes and live a fuller life. Once we make some decisions and put a plan in motion it changes our trajectory, our direction, and sets us on a new path, and if we stay true to that path, and true to us, that path will continue to give back to us and will continue to give us what we need on this new path.
Really, we can change or start something new any day of the year, but why not take some time today to reflect on what things in your life you would like to change that are in your reach to change. Write them down, and write down the steps you can take to make those changes happen. Only we know what is best for us, and only we can do the work to make sure we are and have the best for us. So roll up your sleeves SLAYER, this is a great time to dig into your toolbox and find the tools you need to be your best you this year. SLAY on.
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you typically set New Year’s Resolutions for yourself at the beginning of year? Do you stick to them? If you don’t, why do you think you fail? Are they realistic? Why don’t you follow through? Searching your heart, what change would you like to see this year for yourself? How can you make these changes happen? If you don’t know, ask those around you, with those you trust or who maybe inspire you, ask them how they might go about achieving the same goal. Find those things you think are holding you back, those things you might hide behind, or use as protection, make a commitment to get rid of them, to get out from behind them, to allow yourself to be your best you and shed those things you no longer need, those things that are only holding you back. Give yourself the gift of self empowerment, of doing what’s best for you, and following through on letting your best parts shine.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you
Slay Say
Good morning SLAYER! Behind every negative thing is a positive thing we can learn.
New blog goes up Sunday, until then…SLAY on!
Sometimes Something Negative Gives Us Exactly What We Want
I was recently on a trip, and during the process of checking in online something got messed up, perhaps it had something to do with us trying to do it on a phone in the sun poolside, but online checking wouldn’t let us check-in properly or give us boarding passes, it said we had to go to the counter in the airport. As we were trying to squeeze in the most out of our vacation we were frustrated as we were hoping to just breeze right through to security and not have to account for time waiting in line at the counter to sort out why we weren’t able to check-in properly. We let it get the best of us for a few moments, but the next day we left earlier than we wanted to just to be safe. In the end the whole process didn’t take that long and because my boyfriend was selected for an additional security check in the Jetway prior to our flight, a seemingly negative once again, he was able to board the plane earlier and he was able to get us the exact seats we were hoping to get so we were able to sit together for a trip home. So, a negative turned into a positive. Now, in the big scheme of things seats on an airplane is quite trivial, but it reminded me of how we categorize events in our lives as positive and negative, when, we don’t know how those events will play out in our lives, or the reason they’ve come up. You see, we don’t know what the outcome of any set of events will be. We can set out to have a positive attitude about them, we can do the footwork and set things up to give us the best possible outcome, but in the end, we have no control over how things actually unfold. What we do have control over is how we act and react to what’s going on around us.
In the instance with checking in for our flight, even though we were initially frustrated, we gave ourselves plenty of time to go through the process, and we went to the airport with a positive attitude and mindset. All things we can control. In the end it worked to our advantage, but even if it hadn’t there’s a lesson in that too, one of going with the flow and trusting that life is taking you where you need to be, and that maybe those things we think or feel or so important, aren’t really that important at all, they’re just nice to have, but not necessities for our well-being. Many times we can place importance on things that aren’t really that important, we give them much more value than they deserve, or we tell ourselves things have to be a certain way, but they don’t, not always, maybe not ever, sometimes when things don’t go our way we get the chance to experience something new, or see something from a different angle, and what we learn is that perhaps the way we’ve always “needed” things to be, or wanted them to be, wasn’t the best way after all, and we never would have known that if we always got our way and things always went exactly the way we wanted them to.
It’s a matter of perspective as well. When something seemingly negative happens, it’s our choice to have an open mind about it and be open to new possibilities. It’s also falls into a place of trust or having faith that you are being guided to exactly where you are supposed to be, or need to be. I find when I look at things from that perspective I am better able to let things go of the way I think they should be. Be open to new things, new ideas, new experiences, new ways of doing things. Let go and trust the path you’re on. When things don’t go your way, use that as an opportunity to change your attitude towards it, look at it as a possibility of something new and exciting, something different that you’re getting a chance to experience, and you just might find that the things you fought so hard to have a certain way weren’t the best way after all.
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you find that if something doesn’t go your way, or if it’s not exactly the way you want it, that you have a negative attitude around it? Do you then let that sabotage your day and effect those around you? Do you see that you have a choice in how you let seemingly negative things effect you? Do you see that being open to new things can possibly show you a better way, or make your world bigger? List 5 examples of times that something negative happened and something positive came out of it as a result. List 5 examples where you could have changed your attitude about something you labeled as negative. How could a positive attitude have changed the outcome of those examples. In the end SLAYER, we only know what’s in front of us, or where we’ve been, we don’t have the whole picture, so when we’re only willing to see and do things our way, we may be missing out on a place we’re supposed to be, a place with new opportunities, new people, and new ideas, be open the next time something negative happens, look for the good that can come from that, even if it’s just the act of being open, I guarantee your life will get bigger and brighter if you do. SLAY on.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you
Slay Say
Good morning SLAYER! Maybe the journey isn’t about becoming anything, but unbecoming everything that isn’t really to so you can become who you were meant to be in the first place. Only you know the real you, no one else can tell you who you are.
New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!
Slay Say
Good morning SLAYER! Let go of the results and trust the journey, the journey itself is the point, and when we stay out of the way we often find that what we are seeking may be within reach, or, that the path to it lies ahead.
SLAY on!
