staying present

How Is Your Now?

Fear can show up in sneaky ways. It did just the other day—while talking with a group of women, someone brought up fear, and we all shifted in our seats.

There’s a lot of uncertainty in the world right now. And with uncertainty often comes fear. But most fear doesn’t live in the present—it lives in the past or the future. That’s what makes it so tricky. It takes us out of the only place where we have power: the now.

When I feel fear creeping in—and I have, especially recently—I bring myself back to the present. I ground myself in gratitude. I focus on my breath. I ask: How is my now?

Because right now, in this moment, I’m okay.

Living Outside the Now

Before I began walking this path, I didn’t live in the now. I lived everywhere but here. I obsessed over what had already happened or worried about what might come next. I was spinning—and because I wasn’t grounded in the present, I couldn’t take meaningful action.

My life became unmanageable. Fear ran the show. And instead of facing what was in front of me, I avoided it. I let things slide. I convinced myself that if I ignored the chaos long enough, it might resolve itself. Spoiler: it didn’t.

Eventually, the only way forward was through. I had to stop hiding from the now and start making peace with it. Slowly, the present stopped feeling like a battlefield and started becoming a place of peace—a space where I could reflect, reset, and realign.

The more I committed to living in the now, the less power fear had over me. It still visits, of course. But today, I don’t let it drive. I stay focused on the moment—and when I do, I can breathe again.

Return to What’s in Front of You

We don’t know what tomorrow holds. We can’t change what’s already happened. But we can choose how we show up today.

Even when life feels uncertain, we can find clarity by focusing on what’s in front of us. One step. One breath. One moment at a time.

This is how we quiet the fear. This is how we get grounded.

And if the now doesn’t feel great? That’s okay. The present is still the place where change can happen. We get to respond differently. We get to choose a new direction.

Ask yourself: How is my now? And if you don’t like the answer, know that this is the best place to begin again.

SLAY on.

SLAY Reflection: How Is Your Now?

  • Do you often get pulled into the past or future? How does that impact your emotional state?
  • What role does fear play in your life when you’re not present?
  • How do you feel when you manage to stay grounded in the now?
  • What tools or habits help you return to the present moment?
  • If today feels heavy, what’s one thing you can do right now to lighten the load?

Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one way you’re bringing yourself back to the now when fear tries to take over?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who’s stuck in fear or uncertainty, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a moment of presence to find our power again.

When We’re In Fear, We’re Not Present

Fear has a way of creeping in quietly—and taking over quickly. It pulls us out of the present moment and plants us firmly in the past or the future, playing out worst-case scenarios or old wounds on repeat. But the truth is, when we’re in fear, we’re not really here.

What Fear Steals From Us

I had a conversation recently with a friend who found herself back in a familiar situation—and right back in fear. The feelings were intense: paralyzing anxiety, overwhelming self-doubt, and a fear of losing what she wanted or not getting what she needed. We talked about what fear does—how it derails relationships, distorts truth, and keeps us stuck in unhealthy patterns.

And most of all, how it removes us from the now.

I know this pattern well. Before walking this path, fear ran the show. Most of my decisions—if not all—were made out of fear. Fear of failure. Fear of success. Fear of being seen. Fear of being invisible. I either braced for impact or ran from it.

But fear can’t survive in the present. That’s something I’ve learned in recovery. When I’m rooted in what’s real—what’s right in front of me—fear starts to lose its grip. I may still feel nervous or uncertain, but I’m no longer frozen. I can take action. I can stay grounded. I can breathe.

What Staying Present Makes Possible

When I stay in the moment, I stay in the facts. I don’t get lost in what-ifs. I focus on the next right step.

That’s not to say I don’t feel fear anymore—I do. But I don’t let it drive the car. I know now that fear often tells lies. It tries to convince me that I don’t have options. That I’m still that scared version of myself who had no choice but to repeat the same mistakes. But I’m not. I’ve walked through fire and come out stronger. And each time I’ve stepped into fear, I’ve stepped through it.

Sometimes fear pops up when I try something new. Sometimes it whispers when I begin to grow. But when I remember how many times I’ve faced fear and survived—when I recall the freedom that follows courage—it helps me stay centered.

You don’t have to let fear run your life. You can acknowledge it, feel it, and still take the next step. That’s what growth is.

Don’t Let Fear Take the Wheel

We all experience fear. Some of it is healthy—like instinctive caution that keeps us safe. But the fear that stops us from showing up fully? That keeps us from chasing dreams or forming meaningful relationships? That’s the fear worth challenging.

Stay grounded. Stay curious. Stay present.

Because the only place you can make real change—the only place you can grow—is right here, right now.

SLAY on.

SLAY Reflection: Face the Fear, Stay in the Now

  • What fear has been holding you back lately?
  • Is it rooted in your past—or something that hasn’t even happened yet?
  • How does fear show up in your body, thoughts, or relationships?
  • What can you do today—right now—to ground yourself in the present?
  • When have you faced fear and come out stronger? What did you learn?

Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
How has fear shown up in your life—and how do you bring yourself back to the present?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who’s stuck in a fear loop, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a reminder that we’re not alone—and we’re braver than we think.

If You Feel Like You’re Sliding, Ground Yourself In Gratitude

Because even the smallest anchor can save you from the storm

There are seasons in life when the ground beneath your feet doesn’t feel steady. You’re doing everything “right” — showing up, trying hard, taking care of what needs you — and yet somehow you still feel yourself slipping. Emotionally. Mentally. Spiritually. Energetically.

It starts quietly.

A missed step here.
A spiraling thought there.
A wave of heaviness that settles on your chest and won’t explain itself.

Before you know it, you’re sliding — away from your center, away from your peace, away from the version of you who feels grounded and clear.

I know that feeling well.
We all do.

And when life gets like this, it’s easy to panic.
It’s easy to think: What’s wrong with me? Why am I regressing? Why can’t I hold it together?

But here’s the truth most of us forget:

A slide isn’t a failure.
It’s a signal.
And gratitude is your handhold back to solid ground.

The Quiet Descent We Don’t Notice Until We’re Already Falling

Life rarely knocks us off balance with one big moment. Instead, it’s the slow accumulation of little things:

  • A slight disappointment

  • A broken routine

  • A lingering insecurity

  • A change in circumstance

  • A comment that hits us the wrong way

  • A feeling we don’t want to admit we’re feeling

The slide is subtle.

It begins when we stop listening to ourselves.
When we stop resting.
When we stop checking in on our heart.
When we slip into autopilot because being present feels too heavy.

Suddenly, we’re overwhelmed. Or discouraged. Or disconnected from the person we know we truly are.

The human instinct is to claw our way back through force — push harder, work more, suppress the feeling, pretend it’s not happening.

But the way back isn’t through force.

It’s through grounding.
It’s through presence.
It’s through gratitude.

Gratitude Doesn’t Erase the Hard — It Stabilizes You Inside It

Gratitude gets misunderstood as a way to bypass pain.
But real gratitude doesn’t ignore how you feel.

It simply gives you something to hold onto while you feel it.

Gratitude says:

  • “Yes, this is hard… and here is something still supporting you.”

  • “Yes, you’re tired… and here is something still holding you steady.”

  • “Yes, you’re overwhelmed… and here is something still working in your favor.”

It returns your mind to what is real — not imagined fear, not spiraling emotion, not worst-case scenarios.

Gratitude pulls you out of the fall and reorients you toward truth.

It doesn’t invalidate your struggle.
It anchors you through it.

A Small Gratitude Can Shift a Heavy Heart

When you feel yourself sliding, you don’t need a miracle.
You don’t need a life overhaul.
You don’t need everything to be perfect.

You just need one grounding thought — one spark of gratitude — to interrupt the descent.

It can be as simple as:

  • “I’m grateful for the breath that steadies me.”

  • “I’m grateful for one person who loves me.”

  • “I’m grateful for the strength I don’t always give myself credit for.”

  • “I’m grateful for the lessons that shaped me.”

  • “I’m grateful for this moment of awareness — it means I can choose again.”

Gratitude is not about pretending everything is wonderful.
It’s about remembering that not everything is falling apart.

It’s the shift that gives you back your footing.

Gratitude Helps You Regain Perspective — and Power

When we slide emotionally, our mind tries to convince us that everything is collapsing. Gratitude counters that narrative with something more grounded and true.

It:

  • Softens the panic

  • Brings the nervous system down

  • Helps you see the full picture instead of the distorted one

  • Reconnects you to what’s working, not just what feels wrong

  • Reminds you of your resilience

  • Guides you back to your inner stability

Gratitude says:
“You’ve survived every version of life you thought would break you. You can survive this, too.”

And when you remember that, the slide slows.
When you feel that, the ground steadies.
When you breathe into it, you begin to rise again.

You’re Not Failing — You’re Feeling

There is nothing wrong with you for having moments where your footing slips.
There is nothing wrong with you for needing support.
There is nothing wrong with you for losing your center and finding it again.

Strong people slide.
Resilient people slide.
Healing people slide.

But grounded people know how to climb back.

Gratitude is your rope.
Your anchor.
Your reminder that, even in the wobble, you are held.

SLAY Reflection

S — Sit With Your Truth

Where have you been feeling emotionally unsteady or overwhelmed lately?

L — Look at the Pattern

What small shifts or stressors may have contributed to your sense of “sliding”?

A — Align With Your Values

What gratitude practice — even a simple one — can help you feel grounded in this moment?

Y — Yield to Growth

What becomes possible when you anchor yourself in gratitude instead of fear?

Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
What gratitude has helped ground you when life feels unsteady?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who’s struggling to find their footing right now, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a nudge.