mindfulness

Sometimes Happy Is a Feeling, Sometimes Happy Is a Choice

Let’s be honest: some days happiness wraps around you like a warm blanket. Other days, it’s a threadbare flag you have to raise yourself, even when the wind isn’t blowing.

Sometimes, happy arrives uninvited. A smile you didn’t expect. A moment of peace. Laughter that catches you by surprise. These are the days when joy feels natural. Effortless. When your heart feels light and your worries take a back seat. These are the days you wish you could bottle.

But what about the other days? The days when you wake up heavy, when your body aches with exhaustion, when your mind is cluttered and your heart is a storm cloud? What then?

That’s when happy becomes a choice. And yes, sometimes, it’s the hardest choice you can make.

Feel It When It Comes

We all have seasons where happiness seems to bloom everywhere—inside us and around us. These are the easy days. The ones where gratitude feels automatic, and your smile is real. And when those moments show up?

Let them.

Don’t question the joy. Don’t wait for the other shoe to drop. Let yourself feel good without guilt. You don’t have to earn happiness for it to be valid. It’s not a reward, it’s a gift. And you are allowed to receive it, just because you exist.

Too many of us hesitate to feel joy because we’re afraid it won’t last. But here’s the truth: happiness isn’t permanent, but it is powerful. And when it comes naturally, lean in. Let it soak into your skin.

Choose It When It Feels Out of Reach

And then there are the other days.

The days when happy feels like a stranger.

That’s when you make the choice to reach for it anyway. You choose to smile. To take a walk. To text a friend. To wash your hair. To play a song that makes you sway just a little. To say thank you, even when you’re not quite feeling it.

This isn’t toxic positivity. This is resilience. This is saying, “I know I feel low, but I’m going to plant the seeds of joy anyway.” And over time, those seeds bloom.

Happiness isn’t about denying what hurts. It’s about refusing to let the hurt define the whole day.

You Are Allowed to Want More

Here’s a powerful truth: you don’t have to settle. Not for a life that keeps you stuck. Not for a mindset that keeps you small. You are allowed to chase joy. To design a life that feels good on the inside, not just one that looks good from the outside.

And when you can’t find it? You can choose it. You can create it.

Even if that looks like a slow morning with coffee and quiet.

You are not failing if you have to fight for your happiness. That’s not weakness. That’s strength.

Some Days It’s Both

Sometimes happy is a breeze. Sometimes it’s a battle.

And sometimes, it’s a little bit of both.

Either way, you have the power to feel it, create it, or reach for it. You don’t have to wait for life to feel perfect before you allow yourself to be happy. Let it show up in small ways. Invite it in. And when it comes, don’t push it away.

You are allowed to feel good. You are allowed to choose good. You are allowed to live a life that includes joy.

Even on the hard days.

SLAY Reflection

  1. When was the last time you felt joy without effort? What triggered it?
  2. Do you feel guilty when you’re happy? Why?
  3. What’s one small way you could choose joy today?
  4. How can you remind yourself that happiness isn’t a reward?
  5. What would your day look like if you let joy take up more space?

S-L-A-Y:

  • See where joy naturally shows up in your day
  • Let yourself lean into those moments
  • Acknowledge the hard feelings, but don’t stay stuck in them
  • You have the power to choose happiness, even in small ways

Call to Action: Join the Conversation
I’d love to hear from you.
What does choosing happiness look like for you right now?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who’s struggling to feel joy, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a reminder.

Go Where Your Voice is Needed

There comes a time in life when you realize—not every space is meant for you. Not every conversation needs your input. And not every audience is ready—or even willing—to hear what you have to say.

For years, I believed I had to be everywhere, say everything, and make sure I was heard. Even if it meant squeezing into spaces that didn’t feel right. I thought that was how you made an impact. Be louder. Be present. Be seen.

But experience has taught me something far more powerful:

True empowerment comes from going where your voice is needed, not where it’s merely tolerated.

It’s a shift from trying to fit in to standing tall where you belong.

The Myth of Being Everywhere

We’re bombarded with messages telling us to “show up everywhere.” Post more. Be visible. Stay relevant. Hustle harder.

But visibility does not equal value.

When you stretch yourself thin trying to be in all the rooms, you lose something essential—clarity. The more you chase attention, the more disconnected you become from your true message.

Impact isn’t about volume. It’s about resonance.

The power of your voice isn’t in how many people hear it, but in who hears it and how deeply it connects.

Quality over quantity. Alignment over attention.

Your voice deserves to be heard in spaces where it is valued—where it can make a real difference.

How to Know Where Your Voice is Needed

Not every invitation is an opportunity.

Some spaces want what you represent, not who you are. You might be included to check a box, but your actual voice? It’s sidelined.

That’s not your room.

Ask yourself:

  • Does this space genuinely value my voice?
  • Is my presence here aligned with my purpose?
  • Am I heard and respected, not just seen?

If the answers are no, it’s not your place to pour your energy into.

You deserve spaces where your contribution matters.

Stepping Out of Your Comfort Zone

It’s human nature to stick with the familiar. But sometimes, the places we’ve outgrown are holding us back.

Finding where your voice is needed often means stepping outside your comfort zone.

Try new communities. Enter unfamiliar conversations. Build fresh connections.

You might be surprised how much common ground you discover when you truly see and hear others. Different backgrounds, same dreams. Different paths, shared values.

That’s where genuine community begins—with curiosity, openness, and the courage to explore beyond what feels safe.

Building Meaningful Connections

As we grow, so do our relationships. Not everyone who started with you is meant to go the distance. And that’s okay.

Invest in connections that:

  • Encourage your growth
  • Challenge you in meaningful ways
  • Support and celebrate your voice

The right connections won’t just tolerate your voice. They’ll make space for it. They’ll value it. They’ll help you carry it further.

The Power of Walking Away

One of the hardest lessons I’ve learned is knowing when to walk away.

Leaving a space that doesn’t align with you isn’t failure. It’s wisdom.

When you walk away from what no longer serves you, you create space for what does. For the right people. For meaningful conversations. For opportunities that honor your voice.

Walking away is a declaration of self-worth. You’re not here to prove yourself in rooms that don’t value you. The right spaces will invite you in, not because they have to, but because they want to hear what you have to say.

The Ripple Effect of Showing Up Authentically

When you focus your energy where it’s truly needed, you create a ripple effect.

You may not always see the immediate impact, but:

  • A story you share helps someone feel less alone.
  • A truth you speak encourages someone else to find their voice.
  • A perspective you offer opens minds and hearts.

Impact isn’t always loud.

It’s the quiet strength of showing up authentically, in the right spaces, at the right time. That’s where real change begins.

State of Slay™: The Return

Even as I stepped away to focus on other parts of my life, the State of Slay™ blogs never truly went silent. More people have been reaching out, telling me they’ve been revisiting old posts, finding guidance, connection, and reminders that they’re not alone.

And as you may have noticed, I’ve quietly been writing and uploading new posts over the last few weeks—preparing for this very moment.

So today, on the 8th anniversary of the launch of State of Slay™, I want to say it loud and clear: I’m back.

This next chapter will bring new energy, fresh stories, and the same commitment to real, vulnerable dialogue that started it all. If you’ve been wondering when the blogs would return, this is your answer.

I’m here. My voice is here. State of Slay™ is here.

Final Thoughts: Go Where Your Voice is Needed

You don’t need to force yourself into spaces that don’t align with you.

Instead:

  • Seek out rooms that resonate with your values.
  • Build relationships that amplify your voice.
  • Step out of your comfort zone to discover new communities.
  • Know when to walk away from what no longer fits.
  • Speak your truth where it will be heard and valued.

When you go where your voice is needed, you don’t just create change—you create connection, fulfillment, and purpose.

That’s where the real magic happens.

SLAY OF THE DAY

  • Are you investing energy in spaces that no longer align with your purpose?
  • What communities or conversations feel aligned with your voice?
  • When was the last time you stepped out of your comfort zone to explore something new?
  • Who in your life helps amplify your voice?
  • What’s one intentional step you can take today to bring your voice where it’s needed?

Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
Where is your voice needed right now?
Share your thoughts in the comments. Let’s support each other in finding those spaces.

And if you know someone who needs this reminder—send it their way.
We rise when we lift each other up.

Slay Say

Follow Your Own Road

It’s tempting to look at someone else’s journey and think their path could be ours.
But the truth is, following someone else’s map won’t lead you to your destination.

Your journey is unique, filled with your own experiences, lessons, and growth.
Trust your steps, even when the road is unclear.
Embrace the detours and the unexpected turns—they’re all part of your personal map.

The path to self-discovery isn’t about following others; it’s about forging your own trail.
So, take a deep breath, trust yourself, and keep moving forward.
Your path is unfolding exactly as it should.

SLAY ON.

How Is Your Now?

Fear can show up in sneaky ways. It did just the other day—while talking with a group of women, someone brought up fear, and we all shifted in our seats.

There’s a lot of uncertainty in the world right now. And with uncertainty often comes fear. But most fear doesn’t live in the present—it lives in the past or the future. That’s what makes it so tricky. It takes us out of the only place where we have power: the now.

When I feel fear creeping in—and I have, especially recently—I bring myself back to the present. I ground myself in gratitude. I focus on my breath. I ask: How is my now?

Because right now, in this moment, I’m okay.

Living Outside the Now

Before I began walking this path, I didn’t live in the now. I lived everywhere but here. I obsessed over what had already happened or worried about what might come next. I was spinning—and because I wasn’t grounded in the present, I couldn’t take meaningful action.

My life became unmanageable. Fear ran the show. And instead of facing what was in front of me, I avoided it. I let things slide. I convinced myself that if I ignored the chaos long enough, it might resolve itself. Spoiler: it didn’t.

Eventually, the only way forward was through. I had to stop hiding from the now and start making peace with it. Slowly, the present stopped feeling like a battlefield and started becoming a place of peace—a space where I could reflect, reset, and realign.

The more I committed to living in the now, the less power fear had over me. It still visits, of course. But today, I don’t let it drive. I stay focused on the moment—and when I do, I can breathe again.

Return to What’s in Front of You

We don’t know what tomorrow holds. We can’t change what’s already happened. But we can choose how we show up today.

Even when life feels uncertain, we can find clarity by focusing on what’s in front of us. One step. One breath. One moment at a time.

This is how we quiet the fear. This is how we get grounded.

And if the now doesn’t feel great? That’s okay. The present is still the place where change can happen. We get to respond differently. We get to choose a new direction.

Ask yourself: How is my now? And if you don’t like the answer, know that this is the best place to begin again.

SLAY on.

SLAY Reflection: How Is Your Now?

  • Do you often get pulled into the past or future? How does that impact your emotional state?
  • What role does fear play in your life when you’re not present?
  • How do you feel when you manage to stay grounded in the now?
  • What tools or habits help you return to the present moment?
  • If today feels heavy, what’s one thing you can do right now to lighten the load?

Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one way you’re bringing yourself back to the now when fear tries to take over?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who’s stuck in fear or uncertainty, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a moment of presence to find our power again.

Your Mind Replays What Your Heart Cannot Delete

We’ve all been there—tossing and turning, unable to fall asleep, replaying a conversation or event from the past. Wishing we had responded differently. Wondering why it still hurts. Telling ourselves to let it go—but we can’t.

Our mind replays what our heart hasn’t yet released.

It’s like our brain is trying to rewrite the story to heal us, but instead, the loop only deepens the ache. Until we learn to extract the lesson, offer ourselves grace, and let go of what we can’t change, we keep ourselves stuck in the pain of yesterday.

Before the Release: The Cycle of Replay

Before walking this path, I never let anything go.

I was a walking vessel of resentment. Conversations looped in my head for days, weeks—sometimes years. I’d even replay them out loud, alone in my room, beating myself up for not saying the “right” thing or for freezing in the moment.

The weight of those replays followed me into new relationships and opportunities like a ball and chain. Every fresh connection felt like a repeat of the old one. I filtered every interaction through the pain and fear I hadn’t dealt with. Eventually, I started to isolate—bitterly and often.

And yes, my heart hurt. A lot. But what I didn’t realize was that I was choosing to stay in that hurt every time I pressed play again.

Rewriting the Loop

It wasn’t until I began prioritizing my peace—my healing—that I realized how much control I had.

Letting go didn’t mean letting someone else off the hook. It meant letting me off the hook. No longer dragging around conversations that had already ended or wounds that no longer served me.

I began to ask: What can I take from this? What’s mine to own? And what do I need to release?

Sometimes, yes, the harm done wasn’t my fault. But the replay? That was on me.

By valuing my peace over my pain, I slowly turned the volume down on the noise—and finally found some quiet.

You Can Mute the Past

We may not be able to delete every painful moment from our hearts—but we can learn to mute the noise. To press stop on the loop. To extract the wisdom and throw out the rest.

Because the longer we replay what hurt us, the longer we stay hurt.

Let it teach you. Then let it go.

SLAY on.

SLAY Reflection: Are You Replaying or Releasing?

  • Do you find yourself mentally revisiting the same events or conversations? Why?
  • How does that impact your mood, energy, and relationships?
  • What would change if you gave yourself permission to let it go?
  • What can you learn from that moment instead of reliving it?
  • How might your life shift if you muted the loop—and chose peace instead?

Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one loop you’re ready to stop replaying—and what’s one way you’ll start letting it go?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who’s stuck in replay mode, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a new way to rewrite the story.

When We’re In Fear, We’re Not Present

Fear has a way of creeping in quietly—and taking over quickly. It pulls us out of the present moment and plants us firmly in the past or the future, playing out worst-case scenarios or old wounds on repeat. But the truth is, when we’re in fear, we’re not really here.

What Fear Steals From Us

I had a conversation recently with a friend who found herself back in a familiar situation—and right back in fear. The feelings were intense: paralyzing anxiety, overwhelming self-doubt, and a fear of losing what she wanted or not getting what she needed. We talked about what fear does—how it derails relationships, distorts truth, and keeps us stuck in unhealthy patterns.

And most of all, how it removes us from the now.

I know this pattern well. Before walking this path, fear ran the show. Most of my decisions—if not all—were made out of fear. Fear of failure. Fear of success. Fear of being seen. Fear of being invisible. I either braced for impact or ran from it.

But fear can’t survive in the present. That’s something I’ve learned in recovery. When I’m rooted in what’s real—what’s right in front of me—fear starts to lose its grip. I may still feel nervous or uncertain, but I’m no longer frozen. I can take action. I can stay grounded. I can breathe.

What Staying Present Makes Possible

When I stay in the moment, I stay in the facts. I don’t get lost in what-ifs. I focus on the next right step.

That’s not to say I don’t feel fear anymore—I do. But I don’t let it drive the car. I know now that fear often tells lies. It tries to convince me that I don’t have options. That I’m still that scared version of myself who had no choice but to repeat the same mistakes. But I’m not. I’ve walked through fire and come out stronger. And each time I’ve stepped into fear, I’ve stepped through it.

Sometimes fear pops up when I try something new. Sometimes it whispers when I begin to grow. But when I remember how many times I’ve faced fear and survived—when I recall the freedom that follows courage—it helps me stay centered.

You don’t have to let fear run your life. You can acknowledge it, feel it, and still take the next step. That’s what growth is.

Don’t Let Fear Take the Wheel

We all experience fear. Some of it is healthy—like instinctive caution that keeps us safe. But the fear that stops us from showing up fully? That keeps us from chasing dreams or forming meaningful relationships? That’s the fear worth challenging.

Stay grounded. Stay curious. Stay present.

Because the only place you can make real change—the only place you can grow—is right here, right now.

SLAY on.

SLAY Reflection: Face the Fear, Stay in the Now

  • What fear has been holding you back lately?
  • Is it rooted in your past—or something that hasn’t even happened yet?
  • How does fear show up in your body, thoughts, or relationships?
  • What can you do today—right now—to ground yourself in the present?
  • When have you faced fear and come out stronger? What did you learn?

Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
How has fear shown up in your life—and how do you bring yourself back to the present?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who’s stuck in a fear loop, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a reminder that we’re not alone—and we’re braver than we think.

Rest and Digest: The Power of the Pause

There was a time in my life when I reacted to everything.

Fast. Defensive. Ready to pounce.

I lived in constant fight or flight mode—responding not from thought, but from fear. It felt like life was a game show, and I had to buzz in before the question was even finished. But spoiler alert: there was no prize behind door number two. Just more stress, more chaos, and more regret.

I wasn’t resting.
I wasn’t digesting.
I was just surviving.

Living on the Edge (and Not in a Good Way)

Before I started walking this path of healing, I had no self-care. No grounding. No pause. I was always “on.” And that always-on state pushed me into situations where I wasn’t proud of how I showed up. I wanted to be right. I wanted to win. And I never stopped to ask myself if being right was worth the cost of peace—or relationships.

I’ve written before about the power of the pause, and I’ll say it again here:
That pause saved me.
It taught me to breathe.
To reflect.
To choose differently.

Response Over Reaction

In recovery, I had to retrain my brain. I made a commitment to myself:

  • Don’t act right away.

  • Don’t respond just to fill the silence.

  • Don’t feel pressured to have the answer right now.

I started saying things like,

“Let me think about that.”
“I need to check in with myself.”
“Can I get back to you?”

Those phrases were a revelation.
Because life is not a game show—there’s no buzzer, no penalty for taking your time.
In fact, slowing down is often how we win.

Self-Care Creates Space

Making rest and nourishment a priority changed everything for me.

When I’m rested, fed, and grounded, I don’t jump into the fire—I assess the flames. I choose how I want to show up. I give myself the chance to respond instead of react.

And when I pause, I listen better. I learn more. I catch myself before I repeat an old pattern.

Reacting is living in the past.
Responding is choosing from the present.

When the World Feels Like Too Much

We’re living in challenging times. The news is overwhelming. Emotions are high. People are hurting.
But when everything feels loud and urgent, that’s exactly when we need to rest and digest.

We may not be able to control what’s happening around us—but we can absolutely control how we move through it. We can hit pause. We can take care of ourselves. And we can choose to respond from a place of calm, compassion, and clarity.

That’s how we move forward. Together.

SLAY on.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Reflect & Rise

Do you find yourself reacting before fully thinking things through?

  • Why do you think you do that?

  • How has it affected your relationships or peace of mind?

  • Have you ever regretted jumping in too quickly? Did you make amends—or avoid it?

  • How do you feel when you think back on those moments?

  • What would pausing look like for you?

  • How can you begin to practice rest and reflection before action?

Take a breath, SLAYER.
Let your calm lead the way.

Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
What helps you pause when life feels overwhelming?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who tends to react fast and regret later, send this to them.
Sometimes, we all need a gentle reminder that the pause is where the peace lives.

See With Your Eyes, Hear With Your Ears

I used to live with blinders on.
Not the kind you wear—but the kind you believe.

I only saw what I wanted to see. I filtered everything through my pain, my fear, and the false narratives I told myself over and over again. If I thought I was a bad person, I looked for proof. If I believed I was unlovable, I focused on every moment that could validate that. If I thought life was unfair, I zeroed in on all the ways I’d been wronged.

I wasn’t seeing the truth—I was seeing my trauma.
And I was listening through it too.

A Filtered Life Isn’t a Full Life

When we don’t see with our eyes and hear with our ears—when we see and hear through the noise of our past or our pain—we miss what’s right in front of us. We convince ourselves of stories that may not be true. We act on distorted feelings. And slowly, we begin to disconnect from reality, from the people around us, and from ourselves.

That’s where I was before I began this path.

My perspective was warped. My sense of truth was tangled in denial and self-destruction. But I couldn’t live that way anymore. And when I started my recovery journey, the very first thing I had to do was get honest—with myself, and with the world around me.

The Moment I Took the Blinders Off

Truth didn’t come all at once—it came in pieces.
Each time I stripped away a lie I had believed, the world became clearer. Each time I sat in the discomfort of a moment instead of running from it, I reclaimed a little more power. I learned how to be present, how to focus on what was right in front of me, and how to listen with compassion.

That’s when I stopped reacting and started responding.

Because here’s what I know now:
We can’t live fully if we’re not looking and listening fully.

The Danger of Disengaging

It’s easy to get lost in our distractions—our phones, our playlists, our screens. But when we do that, we cut ourselves off from the life happening around us.
We ignore truth.
We disconnect from others.
We retreat into the stories we already believe.

But life isn’t meant to be background noise.
It’s meant to be lived, seen, heard, and felt.
And the only way we can do that is by taking off the blinders.

Choose to Show Up

When we truly see and hear what’s happening around us, something shifts. We become part of the world again. We stop reacting through old patterns and start participating in real connection. We begin to move with clarity and intention.

Let go of the need to be right.
Let go of the comfort of the old narrative.
And open yourself to what is actually real, here, now.

Because your truth lives in the present.
All you have to do is look. And listen.

SLAY on.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Reflect & Rise

Are you seeing and hearing the truth—or just what you’ve trained yourself to expect?

  • Do you move through life fully engaged, or are you walking with emotional blinders on?

  • What truths might you be avoiding? What stories do you replay that might not be real?

  • How does this affect your relationships? Your inner peace?

  • When’s the last time you truly paused, took in your surroundings, and responded instead of reacting?

Challenge yourself to listen differently.
Look deeper.
And live fully.

Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
What’s something you’ve learned to see clearly—once you stopped seeing it through the lens of your past?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who might be stuck in an old story, send this to them.
Sometimes, truth is what sets us free—but only when we choose to see it.

Don’t Forget To Check Your Odometer

Some of us move through life so fast we never catch up to ourselves—while others move forward without realizing just how far they’ve come. It’s always easier for someone else to notice the distance we’ve traveled before we do. We’re often too close to our own lives to see the growth clearly.

That’s where checking your odometer comes in.

We may not have a physical readout to track our personal mileage, but we do have markers—our habits, our choices, our relationships, and our emotional shifts. When we take the time to pause and reflect, we might just see that we’re not in the same place we were three months ago, a year ago, or even last week.

And if we are in the same place? That’s not shame. That’s information. A gentle cue that it might be time for new action.

How Far Have You Really Come?

Before I stepped on this path, I didn’t want to check the odometer. I didn’t want to be reminded that I wasn’t making progress—or worse, that I was moving in the wrong direction. I judged myself harshly and measured my worth based on where I thought I should be, instead of where I actually was.

I was living with blinders on—trapped in a cycle of self-criticism, isolation, and disconnection. It wasn’t until I asked for help that I started placing positive mile markers in my life. Each step forward, no matter how small, became something to build on. And even when I couldn’t see my own growth, the people around me could.

Their reflection helped me see the transformation happening inside of me—and over time, I started to believe it for myself.

Celebrate the Journey

You’ve come a long way. Even if you don’t feel like it, you have. Maybe you’ve let go of a toxic relationship. Maybe you’re managing your mental health better than you used to. Maybe you’re just waking up and trying—and that alone is progress worth celebrating.

Self-checks matter. They give us a chance to acknowledge our growth, recognize where we still want to go, and celebrate the resilience that brought us this far. And yes, even setbacks can be part of that progress—sometimes, they’re just a moment to pause and breathe before your next big leap.

You don’t need anyone’s permission to be proud of how far you’ve come. Own it.

You’re a survivor. A warrior. A kickass SLAYER.
Don’t forget that.
Don’t forget you.

SLAY on.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Reflect & Recalibrate

  • Do you notice the changes in yourself—or only when someone else points them out?

  • When others celebrate your growth, do you accept it? Or do you deflect?

  • How do you support and recognize growth in others? How would it feel to give yourself the same grace?

  • What’s one area where you’ve worked hard to grow? Write down the milestones that got you here.

  • Where are you today that felt impossible a year ago?

You’ve traveled further than you think. Don’t miss the view just because you forgot to check the odometer.

Call to Action: Join the Conversation
I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one win—big or small—you’ve had on your journey that you sometimes forget to celebrate?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who doesn’t see how far they’ve come, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a reminder.

Start With Gratitude, End With Thank You

The Shift from Despair to Gratitude

There was a time when I woke up dreading the day ahead—angry that I had even woken up. I wasn’t looking for a new start. I wasn’t searching for light. I was living in a cycle of silent suffering, hoping that sleep would take me away from it all. But hoping isn’t a plan. Hoping isn’t healing.

It wasn’t until desperation pushed me to the edge that I found the courage to ask for help. That moment—the moment of deciding to share my truth—was my first act of gratitude, even if I didn’t see it that way at the time. It was gratitude for my own life, for a future I wasn’t sure I deserved but was willing to fight for.

Bookending the Day

When I reflect on how I stay positive—especially during challenging or uncertain times—I always come back to this: I begin and end my day with gratitude. It’s not complicated. Sometimes it’s a list. Sometimes it’s a pause and a silent thought. But it anchors me.

Throughout the day, life happens. Stress, frustration, and setbacks can pull me off course. But when I revisit my gratitude list—or take a small positive action—I’m reminded of what matters. At the end of the day, I say thank you. For everything. For the lessons, for the moments of peace, for the people, for the growth.

Living with Gratitude

Starting and ending the day with gratitude doesn’t guarantee a perfect day, but it sets the tone. It creates space for positivity. It invites me to see beyond the challenges.

When I wake up with dread, I pause and ask myself what I’m grateful for. Even on the toughest days, there’s something—a sliver of light, a moment of connection, a breath. And when I plan something to look forward to after a difficult task, it keeps me anchored in possibility.

Living a life of gratitude means being intentional. It means creating moments of thankfulness and allowing them to guide us. It’s not about ignoring hardship—it’s about finding resilience through gratitude.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Reflect & Rise

  • Do you tend to start your day in a positive or negative mood?

  • What triggers a negative start for you?

  • How can you turn it around?

  • Have you tried gratitude practices before? If so, what worked? What didn’t?

  • Do you allow a negative morning to affect your entire day?

  • How can you incorporate gratitude into your routine to shift your mindset?

  • Do you consciously end your day with thankfulness? Why or why not?

Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
What’s one thing you’re grateful for today?
Share it in the comments. Let’s uplift each other with gratitude.

And if you know someone struggling to find positivity, send this to them.
Sometimes, a simple “thank you” can be the spark they need.