Good morning SLAYER! Maybe the journey isn’t about becoming anything, but unbecoming everything that isn’t really to so you can become who you were meant to be in the first place. Only you know the real you, no one else can tell you who you are.
New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!
Good morning SLAYER! The real magic happens when you understand your true self-worth and share that with the world.
New blog goes up Sunday, until then…SLAY on!
When we’re living our true life we are living in the moment, we are open to new things, open to change, maybe even welcome it, but we are living life on life’s terms, we’re not forcing things to look and sound the way we want them to. We’re also not only focusing on a small part of our story, the story we want to tell, whether good, or bad, we live it all. Our lives have many different facets to them, many different angles and alley ways, many different colors, patterns, and many different moods, emotions, and feelings. Our lives are not just one thing, and if we’re living our life just for one thing we are not living our true life as our true selves. We can sometimes get caught up in wanting to show the world a certain story of who we are and what we can offer, but we can get so caught up in wanting to show something specific that we neglect other parts of our life. We may also, to get a certain reaction from others, exaggerate, or downplay, certain aspects of our lives to get sympathy or to gain praise, but when we do this we short change ourselves, and those people in our lives, because we’re not painting a complete picture and sharing our true selves. So, how do we know if we’re not living an authentic life?
1) When you’re sharing with others you feel like you’re lying to them, or, not telling them the whole truth. When we’re telling people a story rather than the whole truth we know it in our gut, and ultimately they know it too, people can sense when we’re not being authentic with them, even though we may be able to fool them some of the time, our omissions usually catch up to us, and we know we’re not being authentic to ourselves.
2) You feel stuck. You feel like you’re spinning your wheels, like you’re stagnant, not getting anywhere. You may be right! If you’re not living authentically only focusing on what you want to you might be missing key elements and signs that are in front of you that will take you to where you ultimately want to go, but when you’re only looking at the facts that back up the story you want to tell you’re not open to seeing the possibility of change, of growth, and of new doors and roads that are open to you if you’re willing to take them.
3) You feel off. Things aren’t clicking, not going your way, you can’t find your groove. The challenges, headaches and aggravations may be telling you that there is something greater inside of you that you’re not tapping into, and because you’re not living up to your own potential nothing seems to be clicking in your life, your health may even be declining, all because you are ignoring your true self and the true path you are meant to be on. When you’ve lost your rhythm, that’s a time to look at how you’re living your life, there may be a reason why things aren’t going “right” or your way, and that reason maybe be you.
4) You feel like you’re being punished. You feel cheated or robbed by life, you never see yourself as a winner and feel like everyone else is getting all the breaks and nothing ever works out for you. At the end of the day, there is no escape from the hardships of life, we all have them, but when you’re not living as your authentic self they seem to hit harder because deep down, you know, you’re not being true to who you are and trying to manipulate your story, so when things don’t work out, you might feel like you’ve been hit harder because you know you haven’t been true to you and you feel the universe is punishing you, or you’ve been on the pity train and crying “poor me” and think the universe added an extra dash of sorrow. Either way, you’re not being punished at all, at least not by the universe, you are the only one punishing yourself by not being true to yourself.
I’ve said this many times before, and I’ll keep saying it, because it’s true, you are enough. You are. You, right now, are enough. You are special. You are unique. You are talented in your own way. So, why would you want to be anyone else? We get in our own way, our own heads thinking that we should be something we’re not, or that someone else’s life is better, or we want to manipulate the facts to get a specific reaction from someone, but nothing is worth throwing away who we truly are, not for anything in the world. We always know when we’re not telling our whole truth, and if we know, so do others, and, the universe certainly knows, so isn’t it just easier to be you, all of you, and share that story instead of the one you would rather tell?
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you share your true self with others or do you narrate a story you want to tell others? If you don’t share your true self, why do you think you do that? What’s stopping you from sharing your true self? What are you afraid of? What are you trying to accomplish? How do you think it hurts you? Why don’t you make a pact with yourself to not edit yourself or your life, to be you, in every facet and every way that you are you, just be you and be honest about your life and who you are. See if that changes the way you think about yourself and how you think the universe is treating you. Also, see how it changes, or strengthens, the relationships you have in your life. SLAY on.
Before taking this journey I thought I was powerless, I never would have let you know that, because on the outside I presented a powerful front that was run purely on self-will and stubbornness, but inside, I felt helpless, alone, and a victim of life. And I was, because that was the outlook I chose to see. There are certain things we do not have power over, many things in fact, but what we do have power over is how we react to them, or, if we choose to engage with them at all, that, is in within our power. We have so much more power than we think, and when we start to exercise that power, and align those choices with our hopes, dreams and goals, our power grows and we go from powerless, to powerful.
No one us you. No one. There is power in that. There is no other person in the world who brings exactly what you have in the package you have it, no one. Know that. Own it. Use it. Even though you may have similar or shared experiences with other people, even though you may have similar backgrounds or education, no one has exactly what you have. Find the strength and power in that and use it to harness your talents, your ambitions, to go after what you want, use it to push you forward toward your goals and the direction you want to go. Don’t wait for permission to do something, create it, do it, go get it, work for it, make it happen. You are only as outside the center of power as you allow yourself to be, because truthfully, you are the center of your own power. Own that space, stand firm in who you are and what you want and take action.
This goes back to many of the topics I’ve discussed previously at State Of Slay, like many topics I discuss, everything builds on itself to create a solid foundation for us to stand, and to leap from, so we can rise to greater heights. Each step builds on the next, and gives us more self-confidence and strength to move forward, even if we’re still working on finding something in ourselves, the act of doing, seeking, or trying, works as a stepping stone to get us to the next step, and in trusting in the act of doing, sometimes we find the answer there. I’ve learned along my way that I’m not always going to figure it all out just because I’m working to do so, but I trust that I am learning what I need to know and gaining the information I need and I understand it when I’m supposed to have it, when I’m meant to, and that when I’m meant to understand or get what I’m working to find or achieve, I will, as long as I keep doing the work, so, even if you don’t have what you think you need to move forward, trust that you have enough, and that you will have the rest when you do need it and are ready, just take action, take action with the best of intentions with the information you do have, and move forward toward the things you want. I know that can be difficult when you’re struggling with self-doubt, or slow self-esteem, but just the act of doing it anyway, as I’ve mentioned before, taking contrary action, can help you gain more self-esteem and start to chip away at your self-doubt because you are taking positive steps towards being your authentic self and going after what you want. Never be ashamed of that. Never give up if it’s something you want and are willing to work for it. Keep moving forward and focus on your inner strength, your inner power, visualize it, use it to move you when you feel paralyzed with fear or uncertainty, use to grow, and to shine your light.
Know your power, and own it.
There is only one you, that is our power SLAYER. SLAY on.
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you see and feel the power you have within? If not, why not? How do you think you can find it? Only you have the power to find your own power, and when you do, and you find the fire within you, you have the fuel to propel you to where you want to do, you have the fuel to shine bright in all that you do. It’s time to take action SLAYER, to find and own your power, to know that you are like no one else out there, only you are you. Write down 5 things that you think make you special. Write down 5 things you love about yourself. Write down 5 things that you want for yourself. Now use those things that make you special, use those things that you love about yourself, and go get the things you want! You, SLAYER, have the power to do that.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you
Good morning SLAYER! When we act on self-righteous anger we are in danger of hurting ourselves, and those around us. You are in charge of how you react, and who you choose to engage with. Choose wisely.
New blog goes up Tuesday, until then…SLAY on!
Good morning SLAYER! Fears kill more dreams than failure ever will. Dream big. Aim high. Kill your fears. Make your dreams come true!
New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!
Good morning SLAYER! Always speak your truth, your voice deserves to be heard, live authentically, never apologizing for doing what is right for in each moment, especially to yourself.
New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!
Good morning SLAYER! The only obligation you have is to be your authentic self. No matter what others’ expectations may be for us, who we are, and what role we play in their lives is our decision, no one gets to dictate who we should be, that role is ours alone, and one we should be proud of.
New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!
I don’t think it ever occurred to me, until I started on this journey and began to make positive changes in my life, that some of the people in my life might push back and not support me in my journey, that some people in my life wouldn’t support that I was becoming a better person, that I was doing things differently, not engaging in arguments I didn’t belong in, that I had started taking care of myself, and learning to love who I was. Those people who wouldn’t accept the changes I was making had cast me as a certain person in their life and they didn’t want me changing that. It was hard for me to understand at first, I thought that everyone would be happy that I had stopped living my life the way I had been and was finally taking action and getting the help that I so desperately needed, but that wasn’t always the case because some of the people I had chosen to be in my life, who I thought had been friends, weren’t willing to accept those changes and wouldn’t try to adapt the role they had already cast me in.
Just like in a play people cast us as certain roles in their life, without our consent or sometimes even our knowledge or involvement. I know for me there have been times that people have had a wild misconception about the relationship that we had, wild because we didn’t have a relationship, the relationship they thought we had was completely fabricated based on a few brief exchanges and from those they decided who I was going to be in their life and created the rest on their own. When this used to happen I felt obligated to be that person, even if it wasn’t who I really was, or how I felt, not wanting to let them down I would act the part, but that wasn’t fair to me, not if that’s how I really felt, or, if it wasn’t the truth because it was false and based on some sort of fantasy or preconceived notion on their part . As my sense of self got clearer I stopped doing that, I stopped agreeing to be what other’s perception of me was and just focused on being myself, and when people did push back or not like it, that was a great indicator that those people shouldn’t be in my life, because the people who truly knew me, who truly cared, and who truly supported me were happy to see the changes I was making and supported them, and me. I realized that people will sometimes hold on to who you were, or who they thought you were, or who they want you to be and not let go, and if that’s not who I am then I have to let that person go, and that can be hard to do, but as we go through life, and walk this path of SLAYDOM, there are going to be people who fall away, who aren’t up for the journey with us, who aren’t ready for the steps we’re taking, and who’s story in our lives should come to an end. Not everyone is meant to take the journey with us, not everyone is ready, but, if we live our lives as an example of a better way, a more loving way, perhaps they might come back around, or perhaps they’re not meant to, but we in no way should change who we are to fit their idea of us.
We also have to watch out that we don’t do the same to others. I know for myself, as an example, I put my parents on a pedestal for a long time, expecting them to be all-knowing and to always get it right, but the truth is they are just people like myself, learning and growing as they go, and even though they have had more time to live life, they’re journey is their journey, and I have to respect that and let them be who they are, not who I want them to be. And that’s important for everyone in our lives. As a SLAYER we allow others to be their authentic selves, as we want people to honor ours, we allow others to walk on their path at their own pace, their own way, and if they change and grow, we accept that, and hopefully if that growth is in line with ours, we do it together.
At the end of the day we our only responsible for being the people we are, we don’t owe anyone else a different representation, the only role we should play is ourselves, and we should only expect and encourage that in others. Who we are, authentically, is the greatest role of all, stand tall in who you are, and shine bright.
SLAY OF THE DAY: Are there people in your life who have cast you in a role that doesn’t or no longer fits? Why do you think they’ve cast you in that role? Have you been honest with them, or have you played the role they’re wanting you to play? Do you think they will accept your authentic you? If not, why? If they won’t, do you feel this person is a good fit for you and your life? Do you cast other people in specific roles you want them to play? If so, why? As a SLAYER we celebrate our authentic selves, as well as others in our life, the only role we want to play is us, and that’s the only role we want them to play as well, there’s no greater part to play, it’s the part of a lifetime. SLAY on.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you
Good morning SLAYER! It’s OK to be sad, it’s OK to have emotions, to have feelings, to hurt, to love, to be who you are at any given moment, give yourself permission to be true to your heart and honor your truth.
New blog goes up Tuesday, until then…SLAY on!
