Time Takes Time

We often hear when we’re going through a difficult time, to give it time. And many times, my thought has been, well, how much time!? When is this going to feel better? And the answer is, when it’s time. I know that time does some amazing things. It can heal. It can give us perspective. It can give us strength, love, and it can give us what we need to move on, or start over. Time, as it turns out, is the answer to a lot of things, but it takes time to get time.

When I was new in my journey time was all I thought about. I could see others who had started before me, who had more time, and I wanted to be there, to jump ahead to that time, and already feel better, or feel how I thought those people were feeling, but since I had already gotten myself to an emotional and spiritual bottom by not wanting or allowing myself to feel my feelings, I was told I needed to learn to feel them right where I was, and that takes, you guessed it, time. I also had to accept that my time wasn’t anyone else’s time. We all heal, grow, learn on our own time, and it wasn’t my place to judge others time, nor was it there’s to judge mine, and I had to abide by that same rule with myself, I could not judge my own time, only live each moment to the best of my ability.

Time can seem infinite, daunting and empty, especially when we’re waiting to have it, so for me, on those days when I wanted to jump ahead, I had to focus on what was in front of me, do what was in front of my hands and take it moment by moment, minute by minute so I could keep moving forward with time, even if it was slower than I would have liked, but the key to being present for each moment of time was that I was actually living each moment, no matter how uncomfortable it was, I was there, feeling it and learning to make better choices for myself. And when I focused on each moment, I was able to start looking at larger increments of time, minutes, to hours, to days to months, to years. Each moment of time has added up to almost 14 years now, and yet still, like today, I sometimes have to dial it back to just this moment and keep it simple for myself so I don’t run away from time.

With time I do have the privilege to look back at my journey, so see how far I’ve come, and to notice what I still struggle with. Time shows me my patterns, my highs and my lows, and as it shows me that it also let’s me see that all of it, the good and bad, passes, because time never stops moving, even if we get stuck in it, stuck somewhere, time doesn’t stop, it moves past us until we catch up. Time is a blessing that way, it walks with us, and shows us our past, and it offers us the hope of the future, but that hope isn’t an invite to get ahead of it, just some light to look for as we keep moving forward in time.

We all love time when it’s working in our favor, the trick is to realize that it may always be, even when it’s adding stress or moving too slowly, there’s always a reason for time moving just as it is, and even when it doesn’t seem so, it may always be on our side, even when it seems like it’s working against us. Time, like everything in life, is going to tick along at it’s own pace, so why not learn to dance in it’s rhythm and trust that it’s moving at just the right speed to allow us to get what we need out of our time each day. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you make the most of your time? Do you live in the moment or do you find yourself looking into your past or surfing into the future? Why do you think you do that? What stops you from living in the moment? What are you afraid of? Why are you not comfortable just where you are? What can you do in this moment to accept where you are? There is nothing we can do to slow down or speed up time, so why not appreciate it and learn to make the most out of the time we have.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Words are singularly the most powerful force we have, and we have the choice to use that force constructively or destructively.

New blog goes up Tuesday, until then… SLAY on!

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Powerful Mind

I was speaking with someone the other day and sharing that I had strained my neck. I was feeling a lot of discomfort and stiffness which brought up feelings from a past car accident I had two years ago yesterday. We have talked, in the past, about not retelling the story of the accident, as it doesn’t serve me to do so, and it causes my mind and body to relive the events of that day and the weeks and months following it. I explained to her how I strained it and she stopped me, and told me to focus on my neck feeling good, not how badly I was actually feeling in the moment. I often talk about focusing on the positive, and I do do that, but sometimes I forget just how powerful our minds really are, and that we do have the capability to heal much of what bothers us when we choose to believe it has already happened and we can visualize ourselves in that place. Now, obviously there are cases where a medical attention or mental health experts are needed, but we have much more power in our minds than we realize.

I took what she said to heart, as she is actually an expert in her field, and I began to do what I know to do physically for my neck, but also consciously thinking and envisioning it feeling great and moving the way it should. I started Friday afternoon and by Monday I was pretty much back to normal, which seems somewhat surprising seeing as I was in tremendous pain last week and had lost mobility in my neck and shoulders. Now, getting treatment Friday put me on the right path physically, but I truly believe that much of my recovery has been centered in my mind. Now, whether my positive thoughts did help me recover faster or not, I’ve been reminded about my own power as I navigate through life and plan on continuing to make a conscious effort to use my own power to not only think positive thoughts, but to tell my body how it feels at any given moment instead of succumbing to what I think it’s telling me. If I feel tired, I will concentrate and tell myself I am rested, ready to tackle the day, and have the energy to do what needs to be done. If I am afraid, I will tell myself I have courage and am confident I can achieve what I am setting out to do. When I think of my future, the great unknown, I will tell myself I have a bright and promising future and that many great things are waiting for me. Even just typing those last few sentences I already feel a boost of positivity and energy.

Coming from a place, years ago, of negative thinking and negative self-talk, I know the power our words have on ourselves, so why not use that power for good? For me, I am making a commitment to ramp up my positive thoughts and put them into action, not just think them, to make real changes in my life. Like anything else, the more we practice a technique or way of life, the better and easier it becomes, so I am careful not to judge myself if my old thinking, or even a current state of being comes through that doesn’t fit into that encouraging positive mold, I can just acknowledge it and get back to work!

It’s time to tell our mind, body and spirit we’re great, and to keep ourselves in a productive positive place to best serve us and those around us. Many of us do have obstacles to overcome, but we can, or perhaps just lessen them, by getting our powerful minds to work for us instead of against us. In my mind, you’ve already done it, and you’re doing it beautifully. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you realize the power of your own thoughts? How has being positive, and thinking positive turned into positive results for you? How have negative thoughts affected you? Do you consciously work thinking in a positive way, envisioning positive outcomes for yourself? If not, why not? If yes, how have you seen the results in your life? Center yourself, focus on the power of your mind, and send a message to it and your body that you are more than OK and ready to win!

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Life is happening, right now, outside your screen.

New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!

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Close Your Device And Open Your Mind

We live in a time where we are obsessed with our devices. We use them to connect and stay in touch, we use them to stay on top of current events, we use them to document our lives, and we use them to numb ourselves and tune out from our day-to-day lives. Too often we replace people time with screen time. We miss moments, right in front of us, to have meaningful exchanges with others, to help someone in need or to share who we are with those around us. We use our devices many times without realizing we’re doing it, we habitually pick them up and start scrolling through stories, photos or media shutting off our brains and falling into a trance as we gaze at the images passing through our screens, many of us so addicted that we seem incapable of turning them off in meetings, church, movie theaters, while driving, well, for anything. But what suffers when don’t keep ourselves, and our devices, in check? In my experience, everything.

Don’t get me wrong. I use my devices to do many useful things, but I do make sure I am giving myself, and my brain, time away from them. One of my favorite times of the day is when I turn my phone off and hike or  exercise. It is one of my most productive times of the day and always has been. It’s time that my fingers stop doing the work and my mind kicks into gear. That’s when I’m at my most creative, and where many ideas, including State Of Slay™ have been born. Often times I figure things out that I had not been able to find a solution for earlier in the day, I get new ideas, I find inspiration and I think about what I am most grateful for. Very few of that same brain activity happens if I’m scrolling through my phone or computer. Sure, I can get ideas or find inspiration in what I see, but it’s that time away from my screens where my mind really gets fired up. And that goes for the relationships in my life as well. Because I’ve moved many times and traveled a lot for work, my devices easily keep me connected to those I love, but nothing compares to that one on one time with that those people, something I feel we’re loosing in society as a whole. Yes it’s faster to send a text or leave a voice mail, but it’s that human interaction that leads to deeper friendships and relationships, and, possibly collaborations or understandings that only come from time spent together. Those moments are what make us feel alive, make us feel wanted, loved, a part of and connected to those around us. We as a society seem to be feeling lonelier, maybe if we all made a little more of an effort to spend time with others instead of our devices that loneliness may dissipate, or go away all together.

It’s easy to get distracted by our devices, they’re designed to keep us engaged, but what if we kept ourselves engaged in life and those around us and instead of worrying about how many ‘likes’ we have, or what the latest gossip or news story is, why don’t we focus on what we like in life and choose to put our time and energy into those people, places and things, our hearts, and our minds, will thank us. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you tend to focus more on your devices and screens than in life around you? What is the result of that? How does that help you? How does that hurt you? What can you do to take time away from your devices today and engage with life? Do you limit the amount of screen time you get every day? If yes, how has that improved your life? If not, how do think it will impact your life? Do you feel anxious when you don’t have your device with you or don’t have it on? Why do you think that is? What can you do SLAYER to focus each day on the relationships you have in your life, the ideas, inspirations or ideas you may have that never get the chance to be explored or fully realized because you’re attention keeps getting pulled back to your screen. Turn off your devices today and turn on your mind, you may be surprised what’s in there waiting for you.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! The key to being happy is knowing you have the power to choose what to accept and what to let go.

New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!

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