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Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Boredom is the despairing refusal to be oneself.

New blog goes up Friday, until then… SLAY on!

State Of Slay Boredom

If You Wake Up Bored It’s Your Fault

When I was living in the dark, I would often say I was bored. I would say it like life owed it to me to entertain me. But without putting in any effort myself, I continued to live in a repetitious pattern that only had me spiral down deeper into despair. Life didn’t owe me anything, I owed it to myself to get out there and engage with life.

When I began my journey in recovery, I realized that I had never really thought about, or asked myself, what I truly liked, and most of my life I had just done what I thought I should do, or what I thought looked good from the outside. I had to start with a clean slate. That, at first, seemed daunting, but once I began to look at it as something exciting, something to discover, it turned into something fun I could explore. I started my journey with ‘the year of yes,’ as I called it, I would do my best to say yes to anything, as long as it was healthy for me, that I hadn’t tried before, and it opened the door to new friendships and experiences with newfound friends I found on this same path. Again, a little scary for me coming from a place of isolation but isolating only left me lonely and alone with my disease, so I acknowledged how I felt but off I went on this new adventure! The deal I made with myself was that I only had to try new a thing once, if I didn’t like it, I didn’t have to do it again, but in just saying yes, my world opened up and so did my friend circle. Saying yes never had me bored, because even if I found myself in a situation I wasn’t fond of I was learning from that situation, and, I would challenge myself to look for something positive that I could take from that situation. If I had said yes reluctantly, I would ask the universe to surprise me, and I was, many times, surprised by what I found in those situations I had already condemned in my mind before they had already begun. When I was willing to have an open mind and dive into life, life did give back, two or three-fold, and, I discovered a lot about who I was and what I liked. Saying yes eventually led me to write this blog, something I never thought would have been possible sitting alone in the dark, and, saying yes eventually led me to share my life with someone who teaches me more about myself and what I love every day. Saying yes is the key to boredom.

It is our job to remedy our boredom, it is no one else’s, nor is it owed to us. Like with most things, it is our job to take action, and if we’re able to make that task fun for ourselves, and adventure as I did, we set ourselves up to break free from the walls we had previously built for ourselves and allow new people, places and things in. Still sounds scary? There is some trust that comes into play with this way of life, trust that when we let the universe know what we are doing, what our intentions are and that we are willing to grow that it will present us with opportunities to do just that. I still, 14 years later, continue to say yes to life and my life keeps getting bigger as a result. I never wake up today and think about being bored, there’s far too much to do and see to make time for boredom.

Get out there and engage with life. Each day we have endless possibilities and choices, what if you started saying yes instead of saying I’m bored? SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you often say that you are bored or have in the past? If you still do, why do you think you are feeling that way? Are you open to new experiences in your life? If you complained of boredom in the past, what changed? What do you do today that keeps boredom at bay? Can you be doing more? Do you keep yourself open to new ideas and situations? If not, why not? What has saying yes brought to your life that you would have otherwise not gotten? Can you be saying yes more than you are? What can you say yes to today? Change and new things can be scary, but staying stuck where we are and not reaching our true potential is much scarier than that.

S – self  L – love  A – appreciate  Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Sometimes you face difficulties not because you’re doing something wrong, but because you are doing something right.

New blog goes up Tuesday, until then… SLAY on!

State Of Slay Find The Signs

All The Wrong Reasons

I believe we are guided to where we are meant to be. I believe we can connect to something greater than ourselves through a spiritual practice or faith for continued direction in our lives. But regardless of what we may or not believe, when we look at our lives we can typically find a reason why we may have been lead down certain paths, both good and bad.

I was speaking to someone yesterday about this topic, and she smiled and said that the two most important things in her life, those things that contribute to her overall wellness she entered into for the wrong reasons but found something very valuable there. It got me thinking of situations in my life when I may have had different intentions, or even selfish or wrong intentions, but those actions lead me to something beautiful. I do believe that there is a force that guides me, protects me, and wants the best for me, I’ve seen many examples of this in my life, the one most important, is the night I should have lost my life, I wrote about that experience in my blog “A Power Greater Than Myself,” which you can find here A Power Greater Than Myself, and as a result of having been shown that that guidance is there I know now not to question it, or the directions I may find myself heading to, as long as it feels right to my mind, body and spirit. The universe, God, spirit, whatever you believe or may call it, may guide you to something using whatever will be most attractive to you in the moment, to get you to where you need to be, almost like dangling a carrot, and likely, you have been given the clues or shown the way many times before and had chosen not to take the path you are meant to be on, so, a different direction is taken to get you where you should be. We all have freedom of choice, but we don’t always make the best decisions for ourselves, I know this all too well from my past, so sometimes a little bait and switch happens to bring us to that place we ultimately will find beneficial to us.

It doesn’t matter what gets us to where we are meant to be, what matters is that we remain teachable and open to new experiences, new places and new ways of thinking. We don’t know everything, there’s no way we could, the world and what is out there is far beyond our comprehension, we only know what is in front of us and what we have experienced, so when something new is presented to us, we should take that opportunity and explore what’s there, we can always say it’s not for us, but what if if is, and what if it’s exactly what we’ve been looking for, but it just doesn’t look the way we thought it would.

It doesn’t matter what reasons get us to where we are meant to be, what matters is that we are open to what what we may find there. Life does have a way of showing us one thing just so we’ll discover something else. Be open to where your path may lead you and to what you may find there. You may be directed to someone or something that will completely change the direction of your life through a situation that may have been your worst, there is always a reason for everything. Stay true to who you are, trust, and look for the signs, they are pointing you in the right direction. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you believe in something greater than yourself guiding you to where you are mean to be? If not, why not? Can you see examples in your life where you may have changed direction or had been shown a new way of life? Write down that example. Can you think of times when you may have not taken the direction and found yourself repeating the past where you had not been happy? What can you do to change your view, to be open to new things and possibly new roads? The answers, and solutions, you are looking for may just be there in front of you, look for the signs, take a chance on new opportunities and new roads, and be open to things, when you do, the possibilities are endless.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

If You Show Up As Yourself, You Are Worthy

I was just sharing this the other day, that years ago, when I was experiencing a lot of success in my career, I never allowed myself to truly enjoy it because I didn’t think I was worthy of it. Not that I didn’t have the skills, not that I wasn’t working hard enough, and it wasn’t that I hadn’t earned my place, but deep down I thought of myself as less-than and a fraud, so I was always worried the other shoe was going to drop, that I was going to be found out and everything I had worked for was going to be taken away. When I think about who I was then, those thoughts that used to run around in my head, those thoughts I believed, it makes me sad, and truthfully, sometimes, on a bad day, those thoughts do come back, but I know now that anytime I show up as my authentic self, I am worthy, I am worthy of anything and everything.

It takes a lot of guts to show up as ourselves sometimes. To say, hey, this is me, this is who I am, and not worry what people think of us, not let someone else’s opinion change who we really are, or what we’re capable of. For me, it took a lot of work to get to that place, to unravel that self-doubt, self-hatred, and the self-destructive actions of my past, but it’s possible to do it, and the result of that work outweighs any work it may take. You see, the secret is that when we are ourselves that is when we shine, that is when magic happens, when we share our true selves and our true passion to those around us, when we share the true us, we let people see the beauty in us. and no matter what comes from that, you are worthy, you are great, you are special, and no one can take that away from you. People are entitled to opinions, and everyone has one, but if you are true to yourself, one person’s opinion doesn’t matter, you let out everything you got, everything that makes you you, that is the bravest act we can take.

For me, from a young age I was always afraid to let people see the real me. I hide behind who I thought you wanted me to be, and every time I did that a little part of the real me died, it was like a confirmation to myself that I wasn’t good enough, and that if people got to see the real me that they wouldn’t like me. I got so good at it, well, I made it a career, but I lost sight of who I truly was, I had stuffed it down so far, under so much junk, that it lay there, like garbage that I trampled all over. When I finally found the courage to ask for help, to find out who I truly was, it scared me, because I realized I didn’t know. But I found a way to make it exciting. I was going to find out for, probably, the first time in my life. I was actually going to get to know the real me. It wasn’t all rainbows and unicorns, I had to address some bad behaviors and habits, things I had accumulated over the years as a way, or so I thought, to protect myself, I had hurt some people, I had lied to some people, and most importantly, I had done damage to myself. But at the core of who I found was someone I was proud of, someone who made me laugh, someone I could cheer on, someone, I learned to love.

Now I don’t worry about what others think of me, as long as what I am and who I am is authentically me. Me, showing up, and sharing my truth, my talent, my heart makes me worthy, as it does you, and only you can allow yourself to feel that worthiness, no one else can truly give that to you, not so you feel it in your center, only you can do that for  yourself.

If you are struggling today with who you are, go on a finding expedition and figure it out. Put on your SLAYER detective hat and get to work on figuring out the greatest mystery of them all, who you truly are. Once you have, never apologize for what you find, for what makes you you, and for being proud of that. If you stand up as just yourself, that is more worth more than anything someone can give you, you are worthy. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: When you think of yourself do you feel you are worthy of the things you would like for yourself? Do you think you deserve good things? If not, why not? When you have accomplished something do you allow yourself to celebrate you and what you’ve done? If not, why not? Is there something or someone in your past that has told you, or showed you, that you are not worthy? Write down that incident or incidents. Have you told yourself that you are not worthy? Why do you feel this way? Whatever has happened in your past, you are not what’s happened to you, you are here today, and today you have the choice to start a new way of thinking, a new direction, a new life. Let go of what has been holding you back, what has been telling you lies, and take a step on a path of self-love and worthiness. Your foot may be a little shaky at first, but if you keep trudging forward, soon you’ll be walking tall and inspiring those around you.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYER! Your story is important. Your voice matters. Your dreams count. You were born to make an impact. Follow your passion, and discover your purpose.

New blog goes up Friday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Why