Do It For You

You have to get well, or improve your life or self, for yourself. Doing it for someone else usually doesn’t work, unless you believe you are worth it. Many times I have seen and heard people say that they’re making the effort for a spouse, boss, child, or family member, but without truly believing that you are worth the work you take the focus off of you and place it where it where doesn’t belong, on someone else. There are many of us too who believe that it’s not OK to be OK if others in our life are not. There’s a co-dependency in many of us who feel responsible to stay in a place that makes others comfortable and we don’t want to make waves by breaking from the pack and moving forward without them. Move forward. We are not here to please others, we are here to learn to be our best selves, to discover our purpose and calling and to share that with the world. We are not capable of any of doing any of  that when we hold ourselves back to someone else’s standard of living or effort. And, it has been my experience that when we do make the necessary changes for ourselves and others see that change, that many times they will ask about it and my be inspired to do it themselves, but that change has to come from a belief that it is our right, and is right, to do so.

When I made the decision to seek help I did it for me, because I believed I was worth fighting for, and I was and still am. I was fortunate that I had the support of friends and family, but there were those in my life that also weren’t well. I was concerned how my decision to get better was going to affect those relationships, but I had to do what was best for me and my life and let someone else follow their own path, or perhaps join me on mine. Some did. Others fell away as my new way of living didn’t fit in with theirs, and there were others who came to me, over time, to ask how I had changed things around. I’ve found that when we follow our true path and live our lives doing what’s best for our mental, spiritual and physical selves that miracles can happen, not only for ourselves, but possibly for those around us. Everything we do has a ripple effect, and when we make positive changes in our lives people take notice. I discovered the path I have been on for over 13 and a ½ years because someone had shared the change they made for them selves many years prior with me and his story inspired me to seek out a solution for myself. I could see that he had found something that worked for him and I took a chance that it might for me too, it did.

When we focus on what is best for us and not what everyone around us needs or worry about how they may react, we are on our true path, and as we grow on our journey we have the opportunity to show others how they may find theirs, or inspire them to seek that path out for themselves. We cannot control whether they do or not, but when our light shines bright it makes it easier for others to search for theirs. And, for those who are stuck in their ways, and may not like to see the change, yes, there are those people, we can set a boundary with them to respect our choices and way of life, they don’t have to like it, but they need to acknowledge that we do to stay as an active member of our lives.

We don’t owe our well-being to anyone but ourselves. We are the only ones who can hold ourselves back, no one else has the right to do so, and, we shouldn’t even be doing it ourselves, but who we are, how we live and what we want is up to us, the only person we should measure ourselves up against is our own self, from where we have come from and where we want to go.

Let go of the attachment of having to please others, or stay in a place that does not serve you. Let go of the fear of what others may think or do if you break free and find your freedom in ourselves. Let go of the idea that you are not allowed to succeed when others may not. Find your path, ask for the help you need to become your best self and make no apologies to those who may not be ready to join you. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you hold yourself back to please others? Do you choose to spend time with people who make you feel better about yourself and your choices so you feel better about not taking action where you should be? Do people in your life put pressure on you to stay where you are and not move forward? Who are these people? Why do you let them dictate what you deserve? Do you fear the consequences if you stray from their expectations? What do you think they would be? What do you think the consequences will be if you do stay and not follow your true path doing what’s best for you? Always do what is best for you SLAYER, no one has a right to hold you back from where you are meant to be, or where you want to go. Go, be your best self, or find the path that will help get you there.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you