Remeber Your Why, Remember The Magic

We often can get so focused on achieving our goals or going after the next thing or relationship that when we have it we don’t appreciate it in the moment. We work hard to change, nurture relationships with others and push ourselves to go after what we want, what we find magic in, and then when we get there we’re already thinking about what comes next, or forget that the relationship or promotion or whatever it may be comes with day-to-day work to keep and maintain it, and ultimately, to have it grow. When we find ourselves in that rut it’s important to remind ourselves of the magic that person, place or thing had for us that pushed us to go after it in the first place.

There are those of us who are addicted to the chase. Addicted to the next great thing, and are never satisfied once we get it. We build it up in our heads to be something more than it could ever be so once we get it we’re let down or unsatisfied by the reality of what it actually is. I know for myself, I used to be guilty of this. It was like I looked at everything from a child’s perspective, always making it out to be much more than it really was. My expectations were never based in reality, and there was no way anything was every going to reach the level of what I thought it was going to be. As a result I was always let down or feeling empty, and many times thought I had failed, even though I had exactly what I had wanted or worked for because it always felt empty.

It’s important to base our expectations in reality, to go after our hopes and dreams, and allow ourselves to hold some magic around them, but make sure that we’re not setting ourselves up to be disappointed by delusions of grandeur that we build up in our heads. And, even if we keep our expectations in check, to make sure we remember why we wanted what we have in the first place, and appreciating where we are and what we’ve achieved. And remembering that all that we achieve takes a lot of work, and it takes that work to make it work. Many times we’re too quick to throw in the towel when we realize that what we’ve fought so hard for isn’t going to maintain itself or run itself, it takes daily maintenance to keep things running smoothly, and to move things forward to the next level.

We all have the right to dream about what we would like for ourselves, and it’s alright to find some magic around those things, but make sure you keep those dreams and goals in check and not let them get so grandiose that they can never live up to what you’ve built up in your mind. Remember your why and keep that magic that propelled you to start in the first place, and maintain those things as you roll up your sleeves and get to work on what you’ve worked so hard for. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you tend to build up things in your mind that they never reach your expectations? How do you do this? Give an example. Do you let your expectations ruin your enjoyment of what you accomplish? Once you attain what you’ve worked for, are you able to remember your why and keep the magic of what you thought the accomplishment would give you? Are you willing to do the work to keep that magic going? Are you always looking for the next thing and once you get what you want move on to something else forgetting where you just were? Why do you think you do this? How you can you prevent yourself from doing it the next time? It is our nature, SLAYER, to keep striving for more, but it’s important to appreciate what we’ve worked for and accomplished, to remember your why for doing it in the first place and not get discouraged when it requires some work to keep the magic going. Take a moment to pause today, and find the magic in your life.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Laughter: A Sign Of Good Health

When I first stepped onto my healing path, laughter felt impossible.

There was nothing funny about where I found myself. Emotionally, physically, spiritually I was exhausted. My life felt fragile. Every moment felt heavy. I was focused on survival, not joy.

So when I began seeking support from others who had walked similar roads, one thing surprised me.

They laughed.

Not in denial. Not in avoidance. Real laughter. Honest laughter. Healing laughter.

At first, I did not understand it. How could someone laugh about struggles, mistakes, pain, or dark seasons? But slowly I began to realize something powerful.

Laughter was not dismissing the pain.

It was proof they had moved through it.

And that realization gave me hope.


The Healing Power Of Humor

My mom has always said, “If I lose my sense of humor, I lose everything.”

She said it through illness, discomfort, uncertainty, and some very difficult seasons. Watching her hold onto humor even in pain showed me that laughter is not about circumstances. It is about resilience.

When I began my own recovery, I held onto that wisdom. The work ahead of me was serious. I had to face truths, take responsibility, and learn new ways of living. But I did not have to take myself so seriously all the time.

That distinction changed everything.

Humor did not erase the work. It helped me carry it.

And sometimes, laughter was the only light available in an otherwise heavy day.


When Laughter Becomes A Bridge

Something unexpected happened as my healing progressed.

I began laughing with others who had similar experiences.

We laughed about things that once felt devastating. Not because they were trivial, but because we had survived them. Laughter became a shared language of understanding. It created connection, compassion, and perspective.

There is something incredibly bonding about laughing with someone who truly understands your journey. It reminds you that you are not alone. It transforms isolation into community.

And that connection is powerful medicine.

Laughter does not isolate. It invites.


The Difference Between Healing Humor And Hiding Humor

I also had to learn an important distinction.

For years I had used humor as armor. I deflected serious conversations. I made jokes instead of admitting pain. I laughed things off rather than facing them.

That kind of humor keeps healing at a distance.

True healing laughter feels different. It comes from humility, acceptance, and growth. It does not belittle yourself or others. It does not minimize reality. It simply allows joy to exist alongside truth.

Once I understood that, laughter stopped being a shield and became a source of strength.

And that shift made all the difference.


Perspective Changes Everything

Looking back now, some of the choices I made during difficult periods honestly make me laugh.

At the time, I justified everything. I believed I was coping, surviving, protecting myself. But hindsight brings clarity. And sometimes, clarity brings humor.

Not mocking. Not shame.

Perspective.

Being able to laugh at past versions of myself means I have grown. It means I am no longer stuck there. It means healing happened.

And that is something worth smiling about.


Why Laughter Supports Mental And Emotional Health

There is actual science behind this too.

Laughter reduces stress hormones, increases endorphins, supports immune function, and improves emotional regulation. It relaxes the body, shifts perspective, and enhances connection with others.

But beyond biology, laughter signals something deeper.

Hope.

When you can laugh again, even gently, it often means healing has begun.

It means you are reconnecting with life.

And that is powerful.


Finding Light In Dark Seasons

There were days when finding humor felt impossible. Those days happen to everyone. Healing is not linear, and laughter does not mean everything is perfect.

Sometimes it just means you found one small moment of light.

One memory. One conversation. One silly observation. One unexpected smile.

And sometimes that small moment is enough to carry you forward.

Laughter does not deny hardship.

It coexists with it.

And often, it helps transform it.


SLAY Reflection

Let’s reflect, SLAYER:

S: When was the last time you laughed freely, and how did it make you feel afterward?

L: Do you ever use humor to hide how you really feel instead of expressing it honestly?

A: What difficult moment from your past can you now look at with compassion or even gentle humor?

Y: How could inviting more lightness into your life support your healing and emotional health right now?


Call to Action: Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you.
How has laughter helped you heal, cope, or find perspective during a difficult season?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.

And if you know someone who could use a reminder that joy can exist alongside struggle, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a nudge.

Slay Say

Good morning SLAYERS! What would you say today to your younger self?

New blog goes up Sunday, until then…SLAY on!

State Of Slay Relationship