I know for me, it took a lot of pain before I found any humility, it actually took me getting knocked down to me knees, time and time again, until I finally surrendered. Up until that point, I thought I knew better, knew what was best for me, and usually, what was best for you too. My ego kept me sick, and it kept me from having meaningful honest relationships in my life. I was never going to find or see a solution when my ego was running the show, and it was my ego that nearly cost me my life. Humility is where we’re teachable, it’s where the light comes in and the healing can start. It’s that place where we give ourselves permission to ask for help, and where we find the willingness to do the work to find peace. Why do we put ourselves through so much pain until we are able to find humility?
I used to think that humility meant weakness. That it meant I couldn’t fail or make excuses for myself, that I had to have it all figured out, and be successful in everything I did. Now that is one tall order I was never going to live up to, no one could. And, not at all what humility actually is. I also used to confuse humility with self-deprecation. I would tell myself I was being humble but really just putting myself down or not taking credit for a compliment or appreciation of a job well done. That was as close to humility as I ever got, self-abuse to beat my ego down for a moment before it inflated back up to it’s super-sized proportion.
When set out on a path of recovery, I was told I needed to stay right-sized. That struggle inside of me of thinking I knew everything but that I was also a piece if crap didn’t know what to do with that. What size was right? I needed to find some humility and figure it out.
The first step of humility for me was asking for help. A phone call that opened the door, and it was from that step that I was able to find some humility from there, but it took some work to get my ego “right-sized” and admit that not only did I not know everything, I probably knew very little. In fact, considering where I found myself, I probably didn’t know much of anything in that moment. That was scary, but also exciting, to know that, if I let myself, I was about to embark on a new way of life that was going to teach me how to live in a healthier happier way. I had to push that ego aside over and over, as being teachable was the most important thing I needed to get better, and still is today. I needed to look at my part of things, and my part was all over the misery and heartache I had felt in my past, and learn to forgive myself and not blame others for my mistakes and choices that had gotten me to that place. I had to learn what true humility was, and I had to learn that when I let my ego run the show again that the only result was pain, pain that would eventually bring me back to humility.
We don’t have to wait for pain to push us to humility, but for many of us that’s what it takes. Sometimes a lot of pain. I am grateful that I was able to endure the pain I was to find my humility, and that I have learned over the years what true humility is and how to use it properly in my life. I know today that we are all important, and what we say, feel and do has the same level of importance and worth, we are all here to contribute and to share who we are and what we are, the best of what we have to offer, but none of us are better than any other, we are all here to learn, to grow, and, to remain teachable, because if we lose that teachability we probably setting ourselves up for more pain. SLAY on!
SLAY OF THE DAY: Has pain lead you to humility in your life? How so? What pain of you caused yourself with your lack of humility? Do you consider humility a bad thing? Why is that? How have you seen humility be a positive attribute in your life or the life of others? What can you do to find more humility in your life? No human being knows everything, and what we do know is limited to our perspective and experience, it is important to always remain open to new ideas and concepts, as well as the knowledge that there the world is much bigger than what we see everyday. We all have a great contribution to make, to share our best selves, but no one’s contribution is better than anyone else’s if it comes from your true self and shared from our heart.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you