belong

It’s Very Difficult To Push Love Away

Now don’t get me wrong, it can be done, I’ve done it, back when I didn’t love myself, I did push love away because I didn’t accept it, or didn’t believe it, or felt I was unlovable. So, it is possible to push love away, but it takes an effort.

When I started on this path I hated myself. I hated myself so much I would look down to brush my teeth because I couldn’t stand the site of myself in my bathroom mirror. I knew a journey of self-love was going to be a long road, and I wasn’t sure it was a road I would ever find an end to, but I started the journey anyways because I could see others on that road who had found what I was looking for. I surrounded myself with the people on that road, all on different parts of their journeys, but on the same road I was now walking, and those I found on my path showed me love. It was hard to accept at first. I didn’t trust it. And, I still didn’t believe I deserved it. But they loved me anyway, they loved me far before I loved myself. And even when I resisted, or told myself it wasn’t real, they kept loving me, and showed me I was worthy of love, as they all were. I learned to love them for their support, their encouragement, and through their love I slowly learned to love myself. I was shown that no matter what I had done in the past, no matter how ashamed I may have been by my own actions, no matter how disappointed I may have been in myself, I was worthy of love, I was lovable, and, I was love. I was no longer able to push it away, even on those days those negative voices in my head wanted to tell me differently, their love was far greater than my fear of it.

There is love all around us. Much more than we realize. And even more when we’re open to letting it in. We may push it away. Say we don’t have it. But the truth is, it’s there, we just have to let it i, believe we deserve it, and stop pushing it away. Making the decision to allow love in our life is sometimes the first act of love we show ourselves, and sometimes is the biggest act love we can show ourselves. It takes much more effort to push love away than it does to let it in, but once we do that’s when the magic starts to happen, and those dark places within us start to see some light. It may be a little at first, but when we let it in, and we feel it come in, it may just be as smile, a tiny warm spot in the darkness were we lived, but if we focus on the light, that warmth, it will grow, it will get warmer, brighter, and it will start to feel like home.

Let go of what stands in your way of love and let it in, even if you think you don’t deserve it, let it in anyways and learn to trust that you are worthy of it. If we just stop pushing it away, we may just realize that it’s there and through the love of others, we may also find a way to love ourselves, and there is no greater gift than that of self-love. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you see all the love in your life? Do you let it in? Do you believe you are worthy of love? If not, why not? Do you push love away? Why do you do this? What in your past has caused you to do this? Are those reasons valid today, or part of the old you, the story of your past that is no longer valid, or, you can choose to no longer make valid. Does love scare you? Why? Do you have love for yourself? If not, why not? Write down 3 things, SLAYER, that you can find love in yourself. Find 3. Did you have love for yourself in the past? If yes, what happened, how did you lose that love for yourself? You can get it back SLAYER. And, if you’ve never had it, you can find it. Look for the love in your life. Find people, like yourself who are also seeking love, look for those who have found it, who will support you on your journey to find love, let their love fill you up until you can find your own. Allow love in your life and tell yourself you are worthy of love. I know you can SLAYER, if I can, you can, and, I already love you, so use my love to start your journey. I will see you there. I love you.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

Held With Invisible Hands

I talk a lot about how STATE OF SLAY is a community of like-minded people who love and support each other through their journeys. We talk about carrying a torch for each other, lighting someone’s path when it gets dark. And, I talk about walking next to you on your path as I walk on mine. But we are also all held by invisible hands. We are supported by all the hands of the many SLAYERS around the world, we may not see those hands, but they are there, guiding us, giving us strength, loving us, and cheering us on when we are victorious, or just need a hand to hold. Those hands are always there.

I was thinking about that the other day. I feel you all with me, all the time. Even though we are in different time zones, different parts of the world and on different parts of our paths, we walk as one, and as I often say, no one gets left behind.

Our hands are always stretched out for those in need, they are there to embrace one another in greeting, or in love and support, they hold the hands of others to help when it’s hard to speak, or share our truth, our hands can’t be broken, they make a chain, a link, to all of us, and that chain continues to grow.

I walked most of my life alone. And I felt alone. When I think of all of you out there I know I’m not alone, you are all with me each day and I can feel your hands around me, I hope you can feel ours too. And maybe that’s something to focus on, when we feel anxious, nervous, unsure, visualize those hands with you, holding you, giving you strength, because they’re there, and just by seeing them in your mind, they may give you exactly what you need in that moment.

We share a common goal, we share many common experiences, and we walk this shared path to becoming our best selves. We can’t do that alone, I know I can’t, I tried, and, it’s so much better to do it with others you know, you love, others who understand. Those outreached hands can also help us to learn. We can learn to trust again, or maybe for the first time, we learn that those hands are there when we reach for them, even when we don’t, they are always stretched out in our direction, we can depend on them, and we learn that we can stretch out ours, that it is safe and that we feel good when we do it. Those hands connect us to others, to old friends, to new friends, to those like us, we see that we are not alone, that who we are is OK, that we’re more than OK, that we are incredible and we should celebrate that.

Each and every one us is held up by invisible hands. Whether from this community, or others you may belong to. We are here to support one another, to lift each other up, to share this journey when it gets tough, and to show those who are struggling that it gets better, brighter, and that there is hope. All of our hands reach out to yours, we are always here, even when you don’t see us, we reach out to you, and hope you’ll reach out to us too. There is room for everyone on this path, and sometimes just to get by, it takes a lot of hands. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you feel supported either here within our community, or within one of your choosing? If yes, why? If not, why? If you don’t, what can you do to connect with others, or at least one person, who can walk with you and share your path with you? Is there something that stops you from connecting? What is it? Is that the truth, or is that a story from your past that is no longer valid? Only you can make it valid today, if it’s an old story, let it go, try something new, reach out to someone who you admire, who’s walking a path of being their authentic self, who will take you along with them. The only person we hurt by not reaching out is us, we lose every time, it is when we learn to overcome our fear to connect with others that our world opens up, it gets brighter, and we see those hands reaching out for us. I challenge you SLAYER, reach out to one new person this week, talk to them, meet up with them, and share with them, you can never have too many hands.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you