We all make mistakes. Mistakes are how we learn. Maybe we learn to do things differently, and maybe we learn that mistakes are just that, and oops we acknowledge and learn to move on from. It’s when we believe that we ourselves are mistakes where there is a problem, because believing we are what we do can affect our growth. We are allowed to mess up, in fact, it’s encouraged, it means we’re trying and we are taking action, and no matter what the outcome, the result does not define us.
When I as living the dark I did believe I was a mistake. I beat myself up every time I thought I had failed, and, when I was looking for failure I always fount it. I expected myself to be perfect, and set unrealistic expectations for myself that I could never accomplish, and when I didn’t reach my goal it was just another opportunity to label myself a failure. I kept track of each mistake I made and then would ask myself why I wasn’t good enough to reach my goals or do things the way I thought they should be done. I thought of myself as one big walking mistake. It wasn’t until I got help that I was able to give myself permission to make mistakes. It was a huge revelation to me that making mistakes was a part of the journey. In fact, when I was making them it meant I was doing what I should be doing, I was trying something new, or trying something a different way. I wasn’t going to get it right every time, or even the first time, and that was OK, the point was that I was trying and learning from what went wrong, or as planned. Mistakes also let me know when I wasn’t taking care of myself, when I was pushing too hard and not taking enough time for self-care. I began to notice when I was tired or hungry I made many more mistakes than usual, so if I noticed an uptick in my mistakes it was an indication that I may need to look into what I needed and perhaps had been neglecting. And, my journey has also been about allowing myself to make mistakes, to learn from them and condemn myself for being something that no one is, perfect. I’ve also learned that sometimes my mistakes lead me to wonderful destinations, to places I may not have found if I hadn’t made the mistakes I had.
Life is a journey, it’s not about what we do right or what we perceive as wrong, it’s about trusting the path you are on, make the right decisions in the moment, doing the best you can and looking for opportunities to learn and grow. Win or lose we are always lead to where we are meant to be and if we can find comfort in that those mistakes we make become just a minor bump in the road, or a nudge in the right direction. None of us are mistakes, the only mistake we can make is not taking chances, not challenging ourselves and not taking action because we are afraid of making a mistake. Sometimes the mistake you make can lead you to the most beautiful gift. Learn to make your mistakes work for you. SLAY on!
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you tend to beat yourself up for the mistakes you make? Do you talk down to yourself when you do? What do you say? How does that make you feel? How does that harm you? What can you do to stop doing that? Have there been mistakes you’ve made in your past that have brought you something positive in your life? How so? Has that experience made you more forgiving of mistakes you make, knowing that sometimes a mistake can bring an unexpected positive outcome? What can you do to be for forgiving of yourself and the mistakes you make? A mistake is like anything else in our lives, we can choose to look at it as a negative experience, or we can use it to turn it into a learning tool or an opportunity to open our eyes to something new.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you