you hold the key

In The Doing, Something Happens

We’ve all heard the saying, “fake it til you make it.” It’s something I have used in the past when I’m unsure about something but know I need to find a way to accept it, or a way to do it, but sometimes people have a problem with the word “fake,” and I understand that, we as SLAYERS are meant to live as our authentic selves, so how can we do that if we are faking something? Valid point. But instead of “faking” it, why not look at it as just doing it, just doing it even if you don’t believe it will help, just doing even if you don’t know if it will work, just, well, do it. Sometimes in the act of just doing it, something happens, an understanding, a revelation, and a belief that we can. In the doing, something happens.

When I first stepped on this path, a lot of things were suggested to me that didn’t sound like anything I wanted to do, or things that seemed like they wouldn’t help. I was told to do them anyway. To go through the motions and see how I felt. It felt fake to me. I thought, if I don’t believe, or want to do this, how will this help? But it did. The things that were suggested for me did help, they helped me to get out of my comfort zone and reach out, to share my truth, to connect with other people who were also on the same path, and to give back. Give back. At a time I thought I had nothing to offer, I did, and by just doing it I realized that no matter how low I may have felt, there was someone out there that may feel lower, and might look to me for inspiration, and in just doing, I not only helped someone else, but I helped myself, and I started to believe. In the act of just doing, taking the suggestions and just doing them, miracles happened. I started to feel better, I started to have self-esteem, I started to connect with people and didn’t feel so alone, I began to see some light in the darkness. In the doing, something happened.

It’s not a matter of believing to get started, it’s merely the act itself that can bring you to believe, and sometimes, that’s all we have. For me, my life depended on me just doing it, the voices in my head were still so loud, telling me it wouldn’t work, and I just yelled back louder, “I’m going to try!” Sometimes we’re so set in our old ways, or so afraid, or so determined to fail that we don’t believe things can get better, we shoot the suggestions down before we even start, but if we can get ourselves to just begin, to inch forward, to just do it, incredible things start to happen. And, although it may feel scary, or strange, or awkward, we’ve all felt those things before, and we’ve all survived them, so push through them and SLAY on, learn to find your comfortableness in the uncomfortableness, learn to find excitement there, learn to love that feeling of being unsure but trusting it’s right, learn to believe.

Every new chapter, every victory, every new life begins with taking action, there are always a million reasons to not do something, but there are a million and one to start, that one is you, and that is the most important one. You are worth it. You matter. You can and will make a difference. Just do it. You hold the key to your own freedom, but you have to turn the key in the lock you’ve created, turn it, walk through, and set yourself free.

You don’t have to have all the answers. You don’t have to have it all figured out. It’s about taking it one moment at a time, one step at a time, one action at a time, and as you do you’ll gain momentum, you’ll gain confidence, you’ll gain freedom. All you have to do, is do.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Are there things in your life you know are good for you, or better for you, that you just don’t start? Why? What’s stopping you? What if you chose one and just did it? Just started, even if you didn’t know what the result would be? What do you think could go wrong? What do you think could go right? Do it SLAYER! Even if things don’t go as you would like them to, you still learn, and maybe within that lesson is the solution you’re looking for. But, you’ll never know unless you start. Just do it and SLAY on!

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

You Can’t Grow In Your Comfort Zone

When I first stepped on this path I was desperate, desperate to feel better, desperate not to hate myself, desperate to not want to harm myself, desperate to make that dim little light inside of me brighter. And as much as I wanted to change, to grow, to get better, there were times I pushed back, recoiled, and didn’t want to do the work. The thought of sharing what I had been doing, thinking, and the way I had been living made my skin crawl, I was afraid you all would judge me and I would be left alone, a fear I had lived with my whole life, but now, my life depended on me stepping outside my comfort zone and taking action. You see, my comfort zone had gotten me to that place, it had gotten me to a bottom, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and even though stepping out of it and trying a new way of living made sense, and I wanted it, I had to actually take the steps to do it, to take action, no matter how uncomfortable it felt, because it was a better path, and a path that would save my life.

We’ve all been hurt, kicked around, criticized, made fun of, and when those things happened to us, we shut down, we retreated, we hid, we found a place to live that was safe, but in doing that we cut ourselves off from experiencing new things, from hearing new voices, and living life. For me, when I stayed in my comfort zone I didn’t grow, or learn, and I started listening to the voices in my head that told me to stay there, and that I belonged there, and the longer I lived in my comfort zone the more the fear grew inside me and the harder it was to step out of it, that fear became so big and so loud that it keeps kept me there, like a prisoner, only, I held the key to get out.

It goes back to saying yes. We all know in our hearts what we should be doing, we make excuses for not doing them, or trying them, but we know staying tucked away in our comfort zone is not living life to it’s fullest, and not utilizing who we are and what we’re capable of. The fear of stepping out isn’t real, it is us reliving situations from our past and dragging them into our present, but if we’re choosing to surround ourselves with the right people, living as our authentic selves, asking for what we want, and letting others know what our intentions are, finding out the facts, we are safe, we are safe to try new things, with new people, and we are free from the shackles we have placed on ourselves.

For me, getting out of my comfort zone, trusting the people around me who had walked this path before me, and learning to trust myself and my instincts, saved my life, it also gave me a new one, a life full of new friends, new experiences, new tools to use, and a lot of healing and love. It also taught me about humility, and that it was OK to not get things right the first time, most people don’t get things right the first time they try them, that’s part of the fun of trying something new, or part of the journey to SLAYDOM, the point is just to try, to put yourself out there and fly. Your comfort zone will still be there to sneak back to for a break, but the more you step out of it, the more you realize that it’s really a prison of your own making, it will become less and less comfortable as you grow, heal, and sore like you never have before.

Think about all the things you want for yourself, and ask yourself if you can achieve those things in our comfort zone, SLAYER, my guess is you probably can’t, I know I couldn’t. Take the leap, or maybe slide a toe over, walk on the wild side, and leave your comfort zone behind, there are exciting things waiting for you out there, far beyond your imagination, trust me, I’m writing this from far beyond mine.

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you tend to stay within your comfort zone and not try new things? Why do you think you do that? What do you think will happen if you do venture out of your comfort zone? Are you basing your fears on your past? Do you want to live your life for today or stay stuck in the past? What can you do today to make a positive step to get out of our comfort zone? Challenge yourself SLAYER to try 5 new things this week, and write down how you feel after you’ve done them. I’m right out there with you SLAYER, and there are others, you are not alone, take that step towards us.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you