We can easily fall down the rabbit hole of negative thinking, only seeing what we don’t like about ourselves, our lives and those around us, we complain, make negative comments and stay under a cloud of darkness. It can be a dangerous place to be if we allow ourselves to stay there and let it affect us and prevent us from moving forward. If we’re not actively participating in positive acts in our lives, self-care and living in the moment, not in the past or future, we can get trapped in the black cloud of negative thinking and stay stuck there.
I used to complain a lot. I was never satisfied with the way things were yet I never did much to make positive changes for a different result. I would say I was making changes, but I was looking for quick fixes that only put a band-aid on the problem, or would mask it long enough for me to feel like I had accomplished something but the problem was still there, and getting worse. No matter what I had or was doing I always saw the negative in it, or feared it was coming, and at times it would paralyze me, holding me hostage as I slid further and further away from a solution. My complaining only dug the hole deeper as it solidified the negative thoughts in my head as the truth and something that was inescapable. That was not true. The truth is we always have a choice to take action, to make positive choices and work on changing what we don’t like, or would like to improve in our lives. When I finally reached out for help and began the journey I have been on for the last 14 years, I realized how much power my thoughts and actions had. If I tell myself I’m going to have a bad day, I do have a bad day, so why not tell myself I’m going to have a good one? Why not take action each day to ensure I will have the best day I can? We have no control over outside factors that can affect us, but when we can choose how we respond to them and the environment we find ourselves in, and many times, we can change that too. We are responsible for taking the right action for us, the action that enriches our lives, that moves us forward, that helps us grow and learn, and gives back to us. It’s not up to anyone else to do those things for us, and really, no one can, because even if something does some of the heavy lifting and makes some positive changes in our lives, our negative thinking may tear it apart and dismantle the good that was done, it typically only has weight, or sticks, when we do the work ourselves, and, we do it for ourselves. This is where self-love and self-care come into play, we need to give back to ourselves and feed ourselves with what we need to feel good, all on our own, and it’s possible, I can attest to it, as someone who spent most of her life hating herself and today, even on a challenging day, can look at herself with love.
We are all doing the best we can, no one is perfect, but we can strive to be our best selves today, in this moment, and if we continue to take positive action in our own lives the best of today will keep getting better as we become who we are meant to be. So next time you start to complain about yourself or find yourself stuck in a cycle of negative thinking, ask yourself, what am I going to do about it? SLAY on!
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you find you often get stuck in negative thinking? How do you get yourself out of it? Do you get yourself out of it? Do you want to get yourself out of it? How does your negative thinking harm you? What action can you take to change that? What positive action can you make each day to keep yourself moving forward and towards the goals you want to achieve for yourself? Do you believe you are worth the work? If not, why not? Do you doubt yourself? Why? If you believe you deserve all of the things you want for yourself you can make it happen, it may not always look exactly the way you imagine it, as we only know a little of what’s possible, but if you continue to take action you will be lead to the path you are meant to be on, and possibly, to places you had never dreamed of.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you