Coming from a life of hiding my truth, living in fear of being found out and wanting to appear to be more than I was, I understand dishonesty. I was living a dishonest life even from myself back then, so how could I be honest with others? I lied even when I didn’t need to lie, and even without any consciousness of it, my life, in the past, was lie upon lie until I couldn’t keep them all straight, and the only truth in my life was that it was completely unmanageable and I had fallen so far down into the darkness I wasn’t sure I could get out. Thankfully, someone came into my life who shared his honesty with me, which gave me hope.
As I walked the road of recovery I had to learn to be honest, starting with myself. I had to stop believing or justifying the lies that had kept my sick and I had to get rigorously honest as I began to build my life from the foundation up. What I was building was never going to be sturdy enough if that foundation wasn’t built with honesty, so I rolled up my sleeves and got to work. It wasn’t always easy to face the truth of my past, the things I had done, what I had said, and the damage I had done to myself at my own hand. My lies pointed my finger at everyone else, but the truth, the honest truth, was that I was at fault for much of it, or at least played a part in it. Letting go of my fear of being judged I began to speak my truth, and even though my head told me not to I charged ahead anyway and found support on the other end of that truth. People didn’t reject me, or push me away, they offered their hand, their understanding and their ear to listen, and as I shared my truth that guilt, anger and fear began to melt away. I was taught, during my journey, to be honest, honest about my intentions, my time, what I am willing and able to contribute, and as much as I had fear around that to start, as I’ve practdiced it, the result has always been a good one. That doesn’t mean that there hasn’t been disappointment or frustration, but far less of it when I am being honest rather than saying what sounds good or what I think someone wants to hear. And really, what most people want to hear is the truth, not some made-up bullsh*t that wastes everyone’s time. Being honest shows not only respect for yourself but respect to others, it shows vulnerability and opens the door for help or collaboration with another person, and, many times leads to understanding and a solution that we may not have thought of on our own. When we are honest we have nothing to hide, and when we’re not spending our time hiding we are free.
We may go into things with the best of intentions and then realize the reality of a situation, instead of hiding and trying to keep up appearances try being honest, you may find that instead of someone working against you they may actually work with you to get to a result that you both can benefit from, in fact, even the act of being honest will get you a positive result because you are speaking your truth instead of pretending to be something or someone you’re not. Be honest about what and who you are, what you can offer and honestly give, as they say, the truth will set you free, and, it’s all in your hands. SLAY on!
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you tend to be honest with others? If not, why not? Do you feel you are honest with yourself? If not, why not? Has not being honest caused trouble for you in the past? Had you been honest how would that have changed the result? What can you do to be honest in the future? Are you afraid to be honest? Why? What prevents you from being honest? Do you realize that you aren’t being honest? It’s important to be honest with ourselves first, and once we are able to do that it becomes easier to be honest with others, and not only easier, it becomes a necessity to honor our true selves. Let go of what you think you should be and what you should do and be honest with who you are and what you want to do, you may be surprised who will be there to support you.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you