Was Blind But Now I See

As I was listening to Andrea Bocelli’s moving performance of “Amazing Grace” recently at the iconic Duomo cathedral in Milan I was reminded of the years I was struggling, a time when I didn’t’ believe I was worth saving and a time when I had lost hope, the line “I was blind but now I see,” got me thinking, and I hadn’t really put much thought into that particular lyric in the past, just the song as a whole and what it means, but it reminded me of how blind we can be about ourselves, our lives, our behavior, thinking we’re something that we’re not, or living a life that we aren’t. I lived blindly for most of my life, seeing only what my mind told me to see and not the truth of what was going on. I lived my life in the darkness of my mind and the person I was, the real me, was slowly slipping away under the garbage I was piling on top of her, blind to what I was doing and blind to a solution to the life I was living.

We tend to see what we want to see, whether good, or bad, instead of what is. We may paint ourselves a pretty picture and choose to live in it or drape our lives in a shroud of doom and gloom. Often our lives really fall more in the middle, or not as drastic as our minds want us to believe they are. Many of us use things to cloak the truth, to numb ourselves or distract ourselves from reality, that has become a little more difficult during these days of isolation and home seclusion, but it still can be done. Looking at our life as it truly is isn’t always what we want to see, it becomes easier to hide behind the veil of truth we choose to see rather than finding the willingness to make the changes to those things we don’t like when we aren’t open to seeing the truth. For me, I was able to do that for a long time until the truth was standing right in front of me and I could no longer hide. It took the realization that I could continue hiding from my truth but that it would ultimately lead to my demise unless I made some changes and sought help, and once I did and that the veil of truth was lifted, it was then that I could see how truly a mess my life had become, and how much my head had been lying to me. Seeing the truth for what it was proved difficult at first, it was far easier to hide and live in a world of my choosing, but things were never going to get better in that place, and, I was lucky that I saw the truth when I did and was still able to do something about it, many don’t and lose that chance.

As difficult as it may be to face the truth, when we are willing to do so it gives us the chance to change what we don’t like, or, at the very least, improve things for ourselves. When we are able to see things as they are we are able to make better choices for ourselves, and see how those choices not only affect us, but those around us. It is within the truth that change is possible and the opportunity to be someone we are proud of, living a life we want to live, not one we are pretending to live. Seeing the truth for what it is gives us an open door to be our best selves and to take responsibility for our actions, no longer feeling the need to hide or be ashamed of who we are. Take off the glasses you may be wearing and may be impeding the true vision of your life so that you can create a life for yourself that you are proud to see. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you typically see things as they are or do you think you see things as you choose to see them? What do you see? Do you like what you see? What can you change about what you see? How much of what you don’t like has been the result of the choices you’ve made? How can you improve on those choices moving forward? Write an example of something you chose not to see and as a result became a bigger problem. Do you tend not to see the good in your life? Why is that? What good can you see if you look for it? How can you find more good? How can you create more good? When we are able to see our lives for what they are they give us feedback as to how we’re doing, and,  opportunity to make improvements in those areas we may not want to look at.

S – self  L – love A – appreciate Y – you

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