Fighting Your Own Battle

Most of us have probably heard or read a quote saying, be kind, for everyone is fighting a battle we know nothing about, and, maybe we do know the battle they’re fighting, but that may not make it easy to fight your own while someone is fighting theirs alongside you.

It took me years to learn how to fight my battle, or more accurately, live with my battle in a loving and healthy way. It took a lot of work, acceptance and letting go of old ideas and habits that no longer served me, or never really did, but they were what I knew. I, alone, had found my stride over time, there were some bumps along the way, because no matter how hard we’re working, that doesn’t mean we’re only going to encounter others who are working just a hard, or, even have the same intentions. I know I fell down the rabbit hole a few times making that assumption that because I was working hard to change my life that others were as well, or capable of it, and, that wasn’t always the case, a lesson I learned the hard way, and one where I had to start looking at people for face value of where they were in their journey and not the potential of what I thought they could go, or what I assumed they could be. It’s enough to just worry about ourselves and keeping ourselves on the right path, but, we don’t put in all that work just to live in isolation, we do it so we can live a full life and contribute to our community and those around us, enjoying healthy relationships, learning to work with others and be a part of the world around us. But adding all of those factors in can add some curves in our road, curves that aren’t devastating, or worth retreating for, but curves that we need to learn to navigate around as they are not our curves to smooth out, but they can throw us off our path if we let them.

There can be people in our lives that trigger things from our past, we may not even realize it in the moment, why we may be suddenly feeling a certain way, but that other person may have said or done something that we relate to a trauma, situation, or person from our past that holds a lot of emotion. We suddenly are propelled into a set of feelings and we don’t know why. Or there may be someone who reminds us a lot of ourselves, we pick out things we don’t like about them, or are overly critical because we recognize those same things in us, and we don’t like them, so, when they pop up we get angry, or judgmental or are quick to tear them down, sending us back to old behavior and rocking our peace of mind. It is our job to not let people, places and things take away what we’ve worked so hard for. If we are agitated it is our problem, if we can’t fix the issue, walk away, let go and leave it alone. Nothing is worth sacrificing our peace of mind, but we should ask ourselves why it bothers us, what is it about that person or situation that we find unacceptable? Do we recognize it in ourselves?

Each of us is fighting our own battle, but our battle is only our own, not anyone else’s who may be battling beside us. We all have the right to walk our own path at our own pace, no two paths are the same. And, even if they were, who are we to judge?

Focus on your own path and journey, and if someone else’s seems to be infringing on yours, ask yourself why? It really has nothing to do with the other person at all and everything to do with what is being triggered for you. Only we can fight our own battles, we can’t fight anyone else’s for them, nor can they fight ours, so make sure you’re fighting a good clean fight and keep yourself on the winning team, team self. SLAY on!

SLAY OF THE DAY: Are you affected by those around you? How so? How does your battle get affected with those around you? How do you let it? Why do you let it? Do you realize you are letting it? Do try to get involved on other people’s battles? Do you think you may be doing this to distract you from fighting your own? Do you just like to fight? We are each entitled to our own battle, and, that one battle is usually enough without taking more of them on, so stick with your own, and if you notice someone else’s bothering yours, ask yourself why, then let them continue fighting theirs as you focus back on your own.

S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you

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