This is one that’s been on my mind a lot lately. I’m going through a transition and with that, a lot of change, compromise, and well, sometimes triggers of bad behavior from my past. For the most part I’m able to identify it and move on, but, sometimes it gets the better of me and I don’t act my best. Not ideal, but hey, I, like you, are human, and we do have bad days, or moments, the key is to correct them and to keep our side of the street clean. It’s far easier to look at someone else’s side and judge them for the garbage that may be hanging around, but the truth is, there is likely some garbage on our side to. So, how do we keep our side of the street clean?
We start with keeping an open line of communication. When we mess up, we admit to it and talk about it. Everyone messes up at some point, so it’s not the end of the world when you do, in fact, it makes us human, so embrace your humanness and take responsibility for what you’ve said or done. There’s a big dose of humility that comes along with this as well. For me, in the past, if there was something I was far to stubborn to admit, I then would suffer at my own hand for not admitting I had done something wrong, letting it hang over me like a dark cloud, until there seemed to be a storm above me at all times. If you do something wrong talk about it. It’s that simple. Most things can be resolved by a conversation, especially when you are open and honest about your mistake. You’d be surprised how open and forgiving people can be if you’re just straight with them about what was done. Don’t hold it inside, trust me on this, it only festers and gets worse, and, once you have a lot of garbage on your side of the street, you start not to care that it’s there, or that you keep adding more, so stop making more of a mess than there already is and start cleaning it up.
Back to the humility part. Be honest about your mistake, don’t make excuses for it, but explain what you did and that it was wrong, and find a way to make it right. Making it right varies depending on what was done, but it may just be as simple as an apology, or even a hug. For bigger issues try to offer the person a way you think will make it right and be open to suggestions, they may have a different way that suits them better, at the end of the day you want to be sincere about righting the wrong, and about the action you plan to take to make it right, otherwise you’re just making more garbage. This is also not the time to over explain why you did what you did, that’s information that’s good for you to know so you don’t, well hopefully, do it again, but the other person doesn’t need to know all the details of what brought you to the place where you committed the act. As I’ve said before, “just the facts Ma’am,” but keep the facts simple. This is also not the time to try to share the blame with the other person, your act is your act, no matter what the other person did, you made the decision to act, or react to it the way you did, that is your choice and your responsibility, so don’t try to co-share the blame.
And lastly, use this time to make positive changes in your life, so you’re not having to keep sweeping away so much garbage on your side of the street. I always try to look at these moments as learning moments, times when I can take a look at what is wrong and find a better way to navigate around it, or take a look at what triggered me to act out in the first place. There’s no reason to beat yourself up here, everything is an opportunity to learn and grow, and it’s times like these that a spotlight is put on certain areas for us to focus on to make us better people, there is always a way to turn a negative experience into a learning experience, and ultimately a positive experience. Stay out of the negatives by using it to put yourself down for doing something wrong, we all do things wrong, challenge yourself SLAYER to look at it as an opportunity to do something right the next time.
We are all responsible for our own side of the street, and the cleaner we can keep them the easier and more positive our lives will be, we will also be more informed about who we are and what makes us tick, all good information to have. We as SLAYERS set out to bring positive energy out to the world, to be a part of the solution rather than the problem, so if you cause a problem, make sure you acknowledge it and make it right, you’ll be a brighter happier person, and so will the relationships in your life. SLAY on.
SLAY OF THE DAY: How are you at keeping your side of the street clean? Are you able to admit when you’ve done something wrong? Are you able to see your own mistakes? How does it make you feel when you identify them? Are you more likely to try to brush them under the rug, or deal with them head on? If you brush them under the rug, do they go away? How do you feel knowing they’re there? What do you think will happen if you admit to them and make things right? I challenge you SLAYER to do just that. Look at your side of the street and if you see that there is some garbage there, get out your broom and clean it up, you’ll be grateful for it later.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you