Recently, Taylor Swift sparked conversation when she said: “Think of your energy like it’s expensive. Not everyone can afford it.”
That hit me—and clearly, it hit a lot of people. Because the truth is, energy is expensive. Not in dollars and cents, but in time, effort, focus, and emotional bandwidth. Once it’s spent, you don’t get it back. And yet, so often, we give it away freely to people, situations, and environments that do nothing but drain us.
If your energy is expensive, why are you letting just anyone spend it?
Energy as Currency
Imagine waking up every morning with a set amount of money in your pocket. That’s your energy for the day. You get to choose how to spend it—on your work, your relationships, your passions, your health. But if you hand it out without intention, you’ll end up broke by noon.
The same is true for your emotional and mental energy.
Every “yes” you say is a withdrawal. Every boundary you set is a deposit.
So when Taylor says not everyone can afford your energy, it’s a reminder to start asking yourself: Who am I allowing to spend my most valuable currency?
Why Protecting Your Energy Feels Hard
Here’s the catch: many of us were raised to believe that giving endlessly is the right thing to do. That being available, agreeable, and accommodating makes us “good.”
But constantly giving, without discernment, isn’t goodness—it’s depletion.
I know this firsthand. For years, I poured energy into people who didn’t pour anything back. I stayed in conversations that exhausted me, relationships that drained me, and obligations that left me resentful. And I told myself it was kindness, when really, it was self-neglect.
Protecting your energy isn’t selfish. It’s self-preservation.
You Teach People How to Value Your Energy
Here’s the truth: if you treat your energy like it’s cheap, other people will too.
Think about it—if you always answer the phone, always say yes, always overextend yourself, what are you teaching others? That your energy has no limits. That it doesn’t cost you anything to give.
But when you begin to value your energy, something shifts. Boundaries get stronger. Relationships get healthier. And the people who truly value you start to rise to the top.
You don’t have to cut people off with cruelty. But you do have to get clear: What is my energy worth, and who has earned the right to receive it?
How to Protect Your Expensive Energy
If your energy is a luxury item, then not everyone belongs in your store. Here’s how you start protecting it:
- Audit your energy spend.
Notice where your energy goes every day. Who leaves you feeling drained? Who leaves you feeling alive? - Set boundaries without apology.
Remember—boundaries don’t burn bridges, they protect castles. Your energy is the castle. - Stop over-explaining.
“No” is a complete sentence. You don’t need to justify why someone can’t have unlimited access to you. - Invest in what fuels you.
Spend energy on relationships, passions, and practices that multiply your energy instead of depleting it. - Rest like it’s your job.
Because it is. Rest is the recharge that makes sure you have something to spend tomorrow.
The Shift from Pleasing to Protecting
When I stopped people-pleasing, I realized something powerful: not everyone was meant to have access to me. Some people liked the version of me who was always tired, always available, always giving. But that version wasn’t sustainable.
Now, when I say no, when I walk away, or when I don’t engage in drama—I’m not being cold. I’m protecting my most expensive resource: me.
And you can do the same.
Your Energy, Your Choice
At the end of the day, you decide who gets access to you. You decide how much of your energy goes where.
Some people simply cannot afford it—not because they’re “bad,” but because they haven’t earned it, they don’t value it, or they won’t respect it.
And that’s okay.
Because your energy doesn’t need to be affordable to everyone. It just needs to be invested wisely.
So the next time you feel guilty for saying no, or walking away, or setting a boundary, remind yourself:
You’re not rejecting them—you’re protecting you.
SLAY Reflection
- Who in your life consistently drains your energy without giving anything back?
- What areas of your life feel like “good investments” of your energy?
- Do you undervalue your energy by overcommitting or overexplaining?
- How can you start treating your energy like it’s expensive today?
- What boundary could you set this week to protect your peace?
- S – Spend your energy where it’s respected
- L – Let go of guilt when you say no
- A – Align with people who energize you, not drain you
- Y – Yield your time and focus to what truly matters
Call to Action: Join the Conversation
I’d love to hear from you.
Where in your life have you realized your energy is too expensive to waste?
Share your story in the comments. Let’s cheer each other on.
And if you know someone who’s learning to protect their peace, send this to them.
Sometimes, all we need is a reminder that we’re worth it.
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