Even when we get up with the best of intentions, telling ourselves we’re not going to let the outside world affect our mood, that we’re not getting to let our own selves get in the way of a good day, or, those in our direct path, we can get off track and have a good day take a downward turn. Once we start to spiral down it can be easy just to ride it down into the gutters and let it ruin our whole day, or days, but, we actually have the power to start the day over at any time and begin again. Just because our day has gone in a direction we told ourselves we wouldn’t let it, or didn’t want to go, doesn’t mean we can’t hit the reset button and start fresh. I joke often about not really understanding electronics and that my motto when something stops working is, when in doubt plug it out, and I’ve plugged out computers, cable boxes and other pesky electronics many times and gotten them back up and running, and the same is true for our day. When in doubt, plug it out.
When I was living in the dark, I lived with an all or nothing mentality. I would start out the day making a pledge to myself to have a good day and then, as my negative thinking piled up, or as soon as something didn’t go the way I wanted it to I would throw in the towel and get on the negative bus and drive it all the way into the station, then, I would beat myself up for allowing my day to get derailed, but every day I did have the choice whether I was going to get on that bus or not, or, just watch it pass by. My life back then was dictated by the unachievable expectation to be perfect, no one is perfect, so there was no way I was going to be, so, when I messed up in my view, instead of asking myself what I could have done better or differently I let it drag me down into negative self-talk and a cloud of negativity that I let take over my whole day. When I began to walk this path I had to pick up some tools that would give me something to do other than throw in towel.
It started out with me accepting myself as a work in progress, not attempting to find the perfection I was never going to achieve, and also realizing that I did my best learning when I did mess up, or fail, and that it was part of this process. So, instead of beating myself up when things didn’t go well, I began to look at why they didn’t, and if I had any business expecting them to in the first place, I had to look at what my part was and that got me out of thinking negatively and thinking as a victim and getting me into action. I also learned to do something for someone else when I felt my day was taking a turn down the drain, when I got out of myself to help someone that got my head back to a positive place and restart to my day. I learned to make a list of gratitude when I felt the negativity creeping into my day, and when I was having a particularly tough one I’d carry that list in my pocket and read it aloud to myself when I began to feel overwhelmed. As I practiced these new tools my ability to restart my day got stronger, and I began to hit the brakes faster when I felt like I was careening off the road of positivity and progress.
We all have a choice every day to have a good or bad day, but sometimes what starts out good takes a sharp turn and it’s up to us to get ourselves back on track and not get pulled down to a place that may harm us or hold us back. At any moment, of any day, you can start your day over. SLAY on!
SLAY OF THE DAY: Do you give yourself a restart when your day takes you off course? Do you let it pull you down? How long do you stay there? Why do you let it? Do you believe you deserve to be kept down? Why? What tells you that? Have you found ways to restart your day? What are they? When you hit the restart, what message is it telling yourself? It is OK to mess up, to feel disappointed or let down, but it’s then up to us and what we choose to do in that moment, are we going to stay in that place, or focus our energy on a positive restart?
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you