Being disappointed by the results of work I didn’t do could sum up years of my life in the past. I suffered from magical thinking, believing or hoping I would get the desired result just by wishing it to happen. It never did. I would get in my own way, thinking that if I didn’t do it perfectly there was no point in starting the work, or I would believe I wasn’t worth the work anyway, so I continued to hope for different results when I kept doing the same thing to improve my life, nothing.
We get back what we put in, with anything in life, and many of us want certain results but don’t do the work required to make it happen. Day in and day out we scroll through social media and see people getting the results we would like, but then just keep scrolling, resentful that we aren’t posting those same exciting posts, not doing anything about it. It took me falling extremely far down into the darkness and finding myself in absolute fear and desperation to finally be willing to do the necessary steps to improve my life. I didn’t know what all of those steps were going to be, and it didn’t matter, because I knew the first step was to take the action of picking up the phone to ask for help.
I learned as I continued to take the steps forward that I needed to do the work and believe I was worth it in order for it to work, and if I didn’t like the result I was getting, I needed to look at the work I was putting in. And, I have to say, as a reformed wishful thinker, it felt good to do the work and see the results of it. Each milestone I reached built my self-esteem and my self-worth, I worked very hard to get those things I wanted in my life and the results from that laid the foundation of the life I live today.
No one is going to do the work for you, and even if they wanted to, they can’t, it has to come from you. And the thought of it and all that may be required to get the results you want may exhaust you before you start, but if you just take one step at a time, do what’s in front of you, it may surprise you how quickly things start to change. And, just the act of choosing those positive steps in your life will change your mindset which will encourage you to keep going and change that old thinking into positive thoughts to keep you moving forward.
We all have the choice every day, to make changes in our lives that will get us the results we want, or to sit where we are wishing and hoping for that change to happen on its own. As someone who tried it the second way I can tell you it doesn’t happen on its own, that change has to come from you. And, even though it may feel like an uphill battle, it’s a battle worth fighting for, because you are fighting for you, and there’s no better reason to roll up your sleeves than that. SLAY on!
SLAY OF THE DAY: Are you someone who rolls up your sleeves and gets to work, or hope that your magical thinking will get you what you want? If you use magical thinking, how has that worked for you in the past? Did you get what you wanted? Write an example of when doing the work got you a positive result? How did that feel? And even if the result wasn’t exactly what you were looking for, perhaps the work itself was the result and motivated you to work harder next time or continue to work. You’ve gotta walk the walk and not just talk the talk if you want to see results, the best time to start is now, take that first step and don’t look back.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you