During difficult times in my life I have always come out the other side of them better. Even on the most difficult time, the night I nearly lost my life, and by all accounts, should have, I came out better for it. Those big defining moments in our lives, those events that change us, do have the ability to break us, or make us better, depending on how we choose to use them. When I survived, initially, I felt guilty, I wasn’t sure that my life was worth saving, that I, as a person, was contributing enough to be given a second chance, but after I worked through the survivor’s guilt, I began to take stock of my life and started to look at how I could give back, and use what I had experienced to help others. And, when I look at every period of my life that was the darkest, some incredible light came from it when I was able to work through it. Now, I am grateful for my past, as it allows me to offer hope to those who may find themselves in the dark, and what inspired me to start this blog.
When I was in the dark I only saw the dark. I thought it would always be dark and it would never change. I isolated, hid my feelings from friends and family, and slid deeper and deeper down until I almost wasn’t able to get out. My mind told me I could never get out and that if I told anyone what I was thinking that they would label me crazy and judge me, that was not the case. It took someone else sharing their light with me, and shining it on my path, to give me just a sliver of hope that there might be some light out there for me. Fighting my way out of the dark took a lot of courage, stamina and honesty with myself, but I didn’t do it alone, when I was able to speak my truth it led me to the help and support I needed to start my journey, and I continue to rely on that support today over 14 years in.
As I began to unravel the pain of my past I began to see how my story could help others, as someone else’s story had helped me. Those dark moments, struggles and suffering could be turned into something positive, not only for me but for others. For me, I was able to look at those times and learn from them, find forgiveness in myself and others, and pick up new tools to do things differently moving forward. And as I collected those tools life became less challenging, because I had new ways of dealing with life that kept me in the light, and even I wasn’t sure, I was able to reach out to those in my support group and ask them for advice. I didn’t do this alone, I couldn’t have, trust me, I tried, but we’re not mean to do this alone. There is a hashtag I’ve been seeing a lot during this pandemic, #WereInThisTogether, it always makes me smile when I see it, and I’ve used it, and the truth is, we’re always in this together, this thing called life, but when things are good, or better, many of us tend to forget that and only think of ourselves, when we do that, we are vulnerable, we are always stronger together.
So as we all have more time to sit and think about our lives and the world around us, why not ask, how does this make us better, or how can it? That is where real change comes and where the rubber meets the road, that is where action begins, and where there is action there is change. We all have areas we can improve during this time of self-quarantine, lockdowns, and perhaps recovery, the choice is ours, whether we are going to sink down into the darkness or if we’re going to find the light and share it with those around us, using it to improve ourselves. We have a choice to come out of this better than how we went in. SLAY on!
SLAY OF THE DAY: Have you had time to think about how you can make improvements in your life while most of life for us is on pause? Have you thought about what you may be able to change in your life during this downtime? Looking back, during difficult times in your life, did something positive come from those times? What did you take away from those times after you got through them? What could you have taken away from them having some distance from it now? What can you do today to make some positive changes in your life? We have a choice every day to look for the positive or succumb to the negative, let’s collectively let this situation make us better.
S – self L – love A – appreciate Y – you